While the financial crisis has wreaked havoc on the lives, careers and bank accounts of many, it’s actually been pretty sweet for former Goldman executive Peter Kraus. After leaving Goldman in March 2008 he collected $25 million for a few months of work at Merrill Lynch and then took his current job as chairman and CEO of AllianceBernstein. He also bought a five-bedroom apartment at 720 Park Avenue for $37 million and by all accounts seems to be having a pretty good time. Still though, there’s one thing that likely plagues him. Not the public flogging he took for an eight-figure paycheck around the time the economy was having its ass torn out but something so much worse. His rejection by 2008 Banker Of The Year, Ken Lewis.
In FT reporter Greg Farrell’s new book, Crash Of The Titans, he writes that “one thing was clear to Lewis”– that “the ‘Goldman Guys’– Thain, Kraus and Montag– had been in the process of taking over Merrill Lynch when he struck the deal to buy the Wall Street bank [and] that Peter Kraus would not fit into the organization.” Why didn’t K-L like Pedro? Specifically, in one particular meeting, Kraus “turned himself into the center of attention in the conference room, talking nonstop and continually flashing his bright green BlackBerry,” and in general? Ken Lewis hated Peter Kraus because he’s fabulous.
Fabulousness in dress:
Kraus, with piercing blue eyes and a neatly trimmed beard, donned pink and lavender shirts as well as ties sporting splashy colors and patterns. He wore plaid suits and a wristwatch that looked like it had come from the Museum of Modern Art. He took great care and attention on his own presentation and appearance. He looked more like the creative director of a large advertising agency than an investment banker. The women who worked directly for Thain– Margaret Tutwiler and May Lee– admired their boss’s fierce intellect but were absolutely taken with Kraus’s presence. He was the epitome of urban sophistication and taste.
Fabulousness in his eye for design:
Kraus was above having a simple office. Just as Thain and his wife had recoiled at O’Neal’s decor, Kraus was repelled by the contours and confines of a plain four-walled space with a desk. An avid collector of modern art, Kraus knew exactly what he wanted to do with his space…Most striking of his objects was a plasma screen that featured a group of French street cleaners sweeping sand in the desert. On a continuous loop, figures swept the sand, forming small mounds. The sand piles would then be dispersed by the wind forcing the figures to start sweeping all over again…Then there was “the bookcase.” People entering Kraus’s office immediately noticed the stunning art on the walls and out of the corner of their eyes, they’d also note the fact that Kraus had a large bookcase, about 30 feet long by 6 feet high. But either while speaking to Kraus, or walking across the office, visitors would do a double take when they got to the bookcase and realized that it was a piece o art itself and that the “books” were constructed from the same material as the “shelves.” Greg Fleming ran afoul of Kraus one day when he dropped by for a casual chat and sidled up against the bookcase. “Please don’t lean on that,” Kraus said. “Why not?” Fleming asked. “It’s a bookcase.” “No,” Kraus said. “It’s art.
Fabulousness in vanity photoshoots:
Over the weekend, most of the executives going to and coming from the Federal Reserve accessed the building from the parking garage and the employee entrance on Maiden Lane. To accommodate requests for media access, the police designated an area across Maiden Lane as a special zone for cameramen and TV producers as well as reporters.As the MER group made its way slowly out of the rear of the Fed onto Maiden Lane, Kraus noticed the photographers. He took out his phone, as if he were answering a call, and walked toward the media scrum. He paused in front of the photographers and stared ahead into the distance, portentously, as though contemplating an issue of great significance, one that could affect the course of financial history. A dozen or so photographers snapped pictures furiously, capturing this indelible image of Wall Street, poised at the brink. Slowly, Kraus turned away from the photographers, put the phone back in his pocket and rejoined his colleagues from Merrill Lynch.
FIRST
The bottom line and open to no further interpretation:
Ken Lewis thought Peter Kraus was an annoying, prissy faggot and wanted him gone.
He looks like Jeff Van Gundy with a beard and toupee
he reminds me of a Steve Berkenfeld wannabe
Sometimes when I go to Burger King, I “make” pretend phone calls to my wife, and talk loudly about my children while ordering copious amounts of food. I then take the food to my car, and eat it in silence while staring out to lonely High Ridge Road.
Steve “Every Time I’m Nervous, I Grab a Klondike Bar” Cohen
Nice wife
http://www.panacheprivee.com/File/Jill_Kraus/
Fag.
-Jimmy Cayne
“I’m too sexy for some book, too sexy for some books, so sexy for my bookshelf”
“On the catwalk, yeah on the catwalk, I do my little turn [while talking on the phone staring in the distance] on the catwalk…”
Douche bag of the highest order.
The Kraus guy seems like a self-impotent prick as well.
I actually heard she’s a total bitch.
-LEH Quant
That’s not a wife, that’s art
that is typical of peter.
Make sure you order 4 Diet Cokes so you dont blow your cover.
-Fattie
I color coordinate my scarfs with my ties with my suits
– Chuck Bass
This is what happens when a stranger fucks you in the ass.
Over the weekend, most of the executives going to and coming from the Federal Reserve accessed the building from the parking garage and the employee entrance on Maiden Lane that didn’t have dildo detectors. To accommodate requests for media access, the police designated an area across Maiden Lane as a special zone for cameramen and TV producers as well as reporters, Vivid Entertainment “scat” talent scouts, and spread brokers wearing black leather zippered, full head shrouds with red gag balls.
As the MER group made its way slowly out of the rear of the Fed onto Maiden Lane, Kraus noticed the photographers. He took out his phone, as if he were answering a call, and walked toward the media scrum. He paused in front of the photographers and stared ahead into the distance, portentously, as though contemplating an issue of great significance, one that could affect the course of financial history. A dozen or so photographers snapped pictures furiously, capturing this indelible image of Wall Street, poised at the brink. Slowly, Kraus turned away from the photographers, pulled down his pants and incredibly “lit a fart” then put the phone back in his pocket and rejoined his colleagues from Merrill Lynch.
“You are Peter, and on this rock I will build my Church of Fabulousness, and off the rack Jos A. Bank suits, humility and shelves that actually hold books will not prevail against it.”
-God
I see what you did there.
YIKES! Scared me to death and I’m not afraid of nuthin’
Love how the picture mentioned is the one Bess uses. Mister sophistication and suave and he dresses like that to the Fed NY? That fucking shirt looks like he just left Studio 54 and Raul called to tell Pete he left him at the club to go home with someone else.
Don’t you have a risk report to run?
roy scheider
dear god
In December of 2007, on my 72nd interview with Goldman Sachs I was taken to a room without windows and told to wait. Soon a man entered and introduced himself as Peter Kraus. He was wearing a charcoal grey suit with a bright pink shirt and brown bowtie. He had a Blackberry and suddenly, surprising even me, he asked me if I had a handkerchief. I had one and I handed it over to him. He began to rub the handkerchief violently and vigorously on his Blackberry. Suddenly, with all his sweating and grunting and rubbing the Blackberry slowly began to turn a bright green color!
“Oh…OH!!! OH!!!…oh!……there you are…there you are…..and he rubbed the green Blackberry to his face and showered it with litle kisses and some “mmm”s and deep breaths. As he calmed a bit he asked me, ” Did you know that the use of a cloth handkerchief is occasionally considered old-fashioned or unhygienic, or both, in some parts of the world, mainly due to the popularization of disposable paper handkerchiefs and the fact that they are stored in a pocket or a purse after being used? However they are a potentially more environment-conscious choice, as cloth handkerchiefs are reusable. What is your opinion?”
Knowing I only had a moment in which to respond I stated, “Actually, handkerchiefs are artistic props as well. The material of a handkerchief can be symbolic of the social-economic class of the user, not only because some materials are more expensive, but because some materials are more absorbent and practical for those who use a handkerchief for more than style. Handkerchiefs can be made of cotton, cotton-synthetic blend, synthetic fabric, silk, or linen. Handkerchiefs were also used, especially by children, as an impromptu way to carry around small items when a bag or basket was unavailable. They could also serve as a substitute for a bandage over a small injury. In the United Kingdom, the habit of wearing a handkerchief with tied corners on one’s head at the beach has become a seaside postcard stereotype, referenced by the Gumby characters in Monty Python’s Flying Circus.”
He looked at me for a moment. Then he did a “farmer blow” into my handkerchief, handed it back to me and said, “Impressive. Can you meet with a colleague of mine tommorrow at eleven?”
“Sure”, I replied, “no problem.”
What’s with the toupee? Mongolian horse tail? Meredith beaver select?
It’s the clash of cultchas …
You would have scored about an 8 for that, but the damn Russian judge gave you a four.
6.5
Lights off and in a meow meow coma.
Just order a large Farva.
- Ramathorn
I wasn’t intimidated by that fairy. I always made sure that the mason jar on my desk was the same color as the tie I was wearing. As a fellow art lover, I too made sure that no one leaned against the replica of The General Lee that I had in my office.
Supermodel work, cover girl, work it, girl, give us a twirl
Do your thing on the runway
Work, supermodel, you better work it, girl of the world
Wet your lips and make love to the camera
Work, turn to the left, work, now turn to the right
Work, sachey chantey
Work, turn to the left, work, now turn to the right
Work, sachey chantey
I see your picture everywhere
A million dollar fairytale
And when you walk into the room
You’ve had everybody’s eyes on you
All right meow. Hand over your license and registration.
TL;DR
Now he’s at Alliance with that group of glassy-eyed zombies
Was it a replica of the person or the car?
A definite bottom.
Neither. It was the boat.
-The Band
So Thain had a $50k commode, Kraus had a “bookcase” that was not, in fact, a bookcase, and over at Bear, Jimmy (co)Cayne kept a motorcycle in the executive suite… is there some positive correlation between having random-ass stuff in your office and running your firm into the ground?
His taste in wives was predictable, given on his taste in clothing. Cartoonish.
His taste in wives was predictable, given on his taste in clothing. Cartoonish.
Not to nitpick, but Thain’s $50K commode wasn’t actually $50K ($35K, if memory serves), wasn’t actually a commode in the common sense, and had only been shat in a couple times. Three, max.
He looks like a bad guy in a Bruce Willis movie. A bad guy with a thick German accent. And guns.
Uber douche
common misconception– they were referring to the man.
-V. Caine
Are you telling me that guy wouldn’t blend into Charlotte culture?
That would be an insult to cartoons.
http://inebriatedpress.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/081104-jessica-rabbit.jpg
HAAAAAANNNNNSSSS!!!!!
Wait – someone shat IN the commode?
*slaps forehead*
…Dreißigsten Stock…kommt sofort….
Bill Clay
Her wardrobe is bovine-inappropriate…
I would just prefer to have a superficial artistic bookcase rather than a real one to read books with.
Sounds like complete asshole to me
It was the car with wax figures of Bo and Luke in the front seat. My secretary dressed like Daisy and my head of risk was Uncle Jessie.
What a loser and a douchebag.
ove how the picture mentioned is the one Bess uses.
man is a straight up g. no doubt about it
yee nieve americans… so trusting…
AXA, alliance bernstein, who follows what is going on underneath all these layers of who owns what – who cares…control of assets…secured contract for TARP management after causing the problems to begin with? The problem is not what these guys are doing but what we are doing about it. Nothing..
revolving door is the only thing you can be sure is going to keep happening, Revolve your assets out of their doors!
The FEDS take your money, let some other company manage it, who then skims off the top, then declare a huge loss, if you can actually figure out how they decided this in their reporting, or in fact if it is correct, or just covered up by some other paid off auditor, or “moved to some other country” where not required to compare apples to apples…argggh
the plasma – artwork showing a french street sweeper -sweeping mounds of sand and then the wind blowing it away… classic symbolism for this guy, don’t believe that is a coincidence. sand – money
Dear investment guru, I know it may not be smartest way to manage my money, but given the pure corruption and confusion, I’ll take all of my money now, so I can bury it in the backyard, in the form of a “DOLLAR” and can I have a large order of french fries with that!
At least I would know where it is, who has access to it, and can monitor what it is worth each day. Oh yeah, I can also be sure I know where it is NOT being invested!
Just exactly who and what was decided to be stabilized here?