In his opening statement this week, a lawyer for Milton Balkany, the Rabbi who tried to shake down SAC Capital’s Steve Cohen for $4 million, said that his client went after this particular hedge fund manager because he was “Jewish and rich.” Since obviously Cohen is not the only person on earth or even in the area with such characteristics, Balkany must have done his homework to figure out that Steve is not just rich but super fucking rich, and chose to go after a big kill rather than some pedestrianly wealthy citizen.
To that end, given that Cohen is extremely well-known on Wall Street but not as famous to the general population as, say, Jamie Dimon or Dick Fuld, one might figure that Balkany’s intel went deep. Likes, dislikes, reputation, and just generally, of course, that Steve Cohen = King. Grand High Poobah. Lord High Admiral. Archbishop of Stamford. You get the idea- but apparently Balkany did not, as evidenced in a transcript of a taped phone call that took place last January between SAC’s outside counsel, Martin Klotz, and the Rabbi, as part of the sting (SAC immediately went to the authorities after initially hearing from Balkany).
Marin Klotz, a lawyer for SAC: Yeah, and look I hear you and all I can say is I’m the intermediary, I’ll find out whatever I can find out…My client, I can’t control I can just get information from them. I will get back to you as soon as I know more, but…the caveat is I’m gonna be tied up for much of tomorrow, because I’ve got this other guy. Like I said everybody’s under investigation these days and I got another client up there who I have to be sitting holding his hand…tomorrow, so it’s gonna be, you know the afternoon before I get back to the office.
Balkany: Do you think, this evening, or now, that there’s any way of…
Klotz: I can’t reach [SAC in-house counsel Peter] Nussbaum and–you know, look, between you and me, talking to Mr. Cohen is like talking to the president. I, you know, I speak to him, but I don’t—you know, it’s not like I call him up and say, you know, “Hi Steve I need five minutes of your time.” He’s uh, I, I uh, I almost always work through Peter.
Idiot boy! Clearly, Balkany’s ignorance and lack of respect here is quite shocking and it’s a little more than likely he’s earned himself a place on SC’s shit-list. Having said that, on the slim chance he’s ever granted audience with El Presidente and would like to make it right, we’d suggest opening with something like this:
I’ve always had good luck getting Steve on the phone. When his assistant asks I tell her I’m the Zamboni repairman.
All you have to do is stand outside SAC’s headquarters and threaten to burn anything Damien Hirst. Stevie will come out faster than a closeted gay after three appletinis…
actually he’s kind of over hirst.
-larry gagosian
Bess, you’re just posting this to gloat: There’s standing orders among Steve’s assistants that EVERYTHING drops when Bess calls. He can be on a plane, riding the Zamboni, talking to a big client–no matter. They’re equipped with AK-47s so they can shoot their way through the crowds around Stevie if need be in order to get him the phone.
Bess, you’re just posting this to gloat: There’s standing orders among Steve’s assistants that EVERYTHING drops when Bess calls. He can be on a plane, riding the Zamboni, talking to a big client–no matter. They’re equipped with AK-47s so they can shoot their way through the crowds around Stevie if need be in order to get him the phone.
truer than you know…
“talking to a big client”
LOL
The Lord High admiral eh? Boy I hope Ken Griffin, David Tepper, and James Simon don’t read this otherwise there is going to be a stolen shark a la Ocean’s 11 or should I say 3.
I hope you burn for your stupidity.
OT (to self): “boy are they going to think I’m a big timer when I list the names of these famous hedge fund managers.”
the shark hasn’t been at SAC for years. also, kill yourself.
Listen you little fuck I’m really getting tired of every time I post something you say something similar to this behind the luxury of your computer behind the Bank teller booth you work at.
Make it funny or shut the fuck up. And if you can’t control your fucking mouth, pistols at dawn or dicks on the table.
I vote for a soggy biscuit standoff…
Did I say it was at SAC? It’s at the MET since 2007 – yet still a pride kicker for SC.
Did I say it was at SAC? It’s at the MET since 2007 – yet still a pride kicker for SC.
Actually I mentioned those because those 3 are the only ones (besides Soros) that beat Steve Cohen in earnings last year
Raj Rajaratnam will eat Steve for breakfast!
I like that (presumably Bess, but whomever) removed OT’s comment but kept the header so we know that OT said something offensive and stupid.
I like that (presumably Bess, but whomever) removed OT’s comment but kept the header so we know that OT said something offensive and stupid.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
What? Earnings? As in returns? Personal income? Growth of assets? Pretty sure SAC doesn’t generate “earnings” by selling fleeces.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
don’t bother talking to the idiot. seriously, it only encourages him.
i want to throw up.