Citi Analyst Applicant Creates 11-Page Presentation On Why She Should Get The Job

When you’re applying for a gig on Wall Street these days, you’ve got to do something that will set you apart from the crowd. Jobs are scarce and while anyone can tell a firm why they should be hired, few go the extra mile to show. Armed with this knowledge and the knowledge that competition for positions at Citi is fierce, one recent applicant knew she had to raise the stakes. She didn’t just send Citi a resume and cover letter indicating her interest and qualifications– anyone can do that. She sent them an 11-page presentation entitled “I’m Always Awake With Citi: 9 Reasons Why You SHOULD Hire Me As Your Investment Banking Analyst” filled with headers like “Smart” and lotsa clip art. Perhaps it was the reasons, perhaps it was the fact that she appealed to someone at Citi’s love of its insomniac tagline, but we’re told she’s been asked to come in next week. (We’re also told she created similar presentations for other banks, such as BAML, which has also invited her to stop by next week, and that she has interviews set up with “several” firms. Citi may be her “dream,” but they’re not the only ones who should be offered a piece of this and girlfriend is a hustler.) Job-seekers, take note.

Subject: Citi Investment Banking Analyst Application

I’m here to apply for Investment Banking Analyst position in Citi, my dream job in dream company. I’m graduating business school in Dec 2010, so I can start work in January 2011. My cover letter and resume are attached and I will appreciate it very much if you could do me favor to talk a look or forward them to other hiring managers.

Look forward to hearing from you.

Thanks very much.

Citi Cover Letter Presentation [PDF]

(hidden for your protection)
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447 Responses to “Citi Analyst Applicant Creates 11-Page Presentation On Why She Should Get The Job”

  1. Moe says:

    Jobs are not at a premium?

  2. tits says:

    “my dream job in dream company”

    I bet she says words like that to all the boys. Slore!

  3. Guest says:

    Unless it’s 9 inside tips from expert networks, I fail to see the value.

  4. Guy Waiting for the Trainwreck says:

    Did she apply at Tullet Prebon?

  5. Early Bird Worm Handler says:

    You’re up early!!

  6. Guest says:

    There might not be a giant step that does it, but there’s a giant kick in the butt that does. Next.

  7. FLRM says:

    The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

    -Former Lehman Risk Manager

  8. Shawn13 says:

    Talk a look? Next.

  9. TheSameGuest says:

    Unless you make a video of your aerial skiing and tennis/martial arts mastery, i don’t think anyone will be impressed.

  10. Guest says:

    I bet a Jefferies first year wrote this for her.

  11. TheSameGuest says:

    Wow you’ve officially changed my life with that.

  12. Aleksey Vayner says:


  13. Decent Guy says:

    Banks advertises like that so why shouldn’t she? A clever effort.

    -Decent Guy Who Hopes She Gets a Job and Admires Her Effort

  14. Guest says:

    You have just abridged her presentation by 1 slide.

    note to Analyst-Sweetie– nix the detail oriented page please.

  15. Guest says:

    Ghey presentation is ghey.

  16. anti DB says:

    The clipart looks like the work of the unabomber. If she wants to impress us, she should be rapping on a skateboard

  17. GG says:

    It is a clever effort, but she should have taken the time to have someone go over the presentation before she sent it out. There are way too many awkward sentences.

  18. Guest says:

    Oh really???????

    -Nicholas Bruce Lee Federer

  19. tits says:

    Impossible is nothing at Citi

  20. Guest says:

    $200 in fund raising? A NYC hobo makes more than that outside the Lipstick building in an afternoon.

  21. Guest says:

    Welcome to the new Citi templates…

  22. NakedShort says:

    …raised more than $200 donation….


  23. Supraman says:

    Looks like someone learned everything she knows about Wall Street from BI slideshows.

  24. Supraman says:

    “I also excited about participating in different deals….”

  25. Naughty Hawk says:

    Citi’s “careers” page has a few typos, too:

    “Citi is today&acutes pre-eminent financial services company and was built to create a highly diversified financial services company that could act as one to deliver solutions to clients throughout the world.”

  26. Guest says:

    she’ll fit right in.


  27. Guest says:

    I think this presentation was store-bought from Successories©.

  28. Hank_Blodget says:


  29. Decent Guy says:

    tits and GG:

    I agree with GG that she missed some editing efforts. Ah, youth. And, dear tits, as far as “boning her”, as they say in the parlance of our times, I am not a physical natural gas trader from East Texas so I don’t see how you could cast that sweeping assertion upon me.

  30. Tommy Callahan Jr. says:

    The Comic Club is more popular than the Rugby Club? WTF is wrong with kids today?

  31. NakedShort says:

    WTF does Eddie Lampert’s shop have to do with this?

  32. CoveredLong says:

    Damn – I want to make fun of her, but I’m only a No. 3 tier for CFA Level 1 exam.

  33. Guest says:

    She will definitely get this job!

    – Guy who listed winning his 4th grade local community science fair on his medical school applications and was rejected from each and every one of them (including the schools in the Caribbean and Hungary)

  34. StillNoCouch says:

    Hell, I’ve been submitting ‘additional material’ for years. In some respects it does show a little creative effort … but this was a pretty lame attempt.

    They probably called her in for the goof-factor.

  35. tits says:

    My apologies.

  36. Guest says:

    “9 inside tips”?? Sounds like what happened to Snow White while under the spell.

    -Humorous AIG Quant

  37. Anonymous says:

    Maybe I’m too hungover/insufficiently caffeinated but wtf does that sentence mean?

  38. Citi HR says:

    Bess, I think you got the rough draft of the presentation. The version I saw has a last slide that reads:


    I clearly have no shame and am willing to do whatever it takes to get this job. And I mean anything.

  39. Oracle says:

    When I wanted to get started in finance, I wrote letters begging to be part of a team and even offered to work for free to get the opportunity.

    -The Oracle of Omaha
    Runza, NE

  40. Vulture Fund Subhuman says:

    and some brain matter if he’s lucky

  41. Guest says:

    We are going to need a picture.

    – Hand Bridge Cap HR

  42. Guest says:

    I respectfully disagree. The called her in on the off chance she dresses like Debralee.

  43. Ted says:


    -Ted Kaczynski
    ADX Florence

  44. StuckInOhio says:

    Some marketing major blonde is well on her way to investment relations?

  45. guestssss says:

    …and one time at band camp….

  46. Pier0188 says:

    I would have tossed the resume over this part alone…then called CFAI.

  47. NakedShort says:

    That answers so many questions. Thank you!

  48. Guest says:

    Even if she gets rejected with this atrocious presentation, she’ll be back on her knees in no time.

  49. Impossible is Nothing says:

    I ran a successful hedge fund, bench pressed 495 pounds, hit a tennis serve 140 mph, karate chopped 7 bricks, did ballroom dancing, authored a book on the Holocaust and even gave a video interview describing my various achievements. And for all that, I still did not get a job offer. This girl’s got NOTHING compared to me.

    –Aleksey Vayner

  50. Guest says:


    -Chuck Norris

  51. StuckInOhio says:

    I will lick peanut butter off of anything. ANYTHING

  52. General Disarray says:

    With all the typos, lack of real information, and general pointlessness of this presentation, you’d have tossed the resume over just the CFA error? I mean, the only reason she would know what tier she was for the Level 2 exam was if she FAILED the level 2 exam. And since she is listing that as an accomplishment, I can see why, she clearly does not know her Ethics or Standards of Practice.

    Also, you might give her a shot, remember she used to work simultaneously on three projects in hand. Clearly she can give multiple people happy endings at one time.

  53. CFA1 says:

    Damn Koreans. Always raising the bar for the rest of us.

  54. Jrgoldie says:

    Am I wrong to assume that English is not her first language? She is probably a slant and should include she offers Happy Endings

  55. Columbia MBA says:

    resume rejected by citi > CFA > MBA

  56. Guest says:

    Donald Trump
    Ivanka Turmp
    Jamie Dimon?

  57. Yogagirl says:

    I like her chutzpah, but she seriously needs an editor. There are a few typos and several grammatical errors like “I also excited” instead of “I’m also excited.” Sentences like “When I’m doing my best to quest for excellence” are cringers. As a future banker, she should invest in hiring a writer to proof her copy.

  58. WUSTLSUCKS says:

    WUSTL??? LOL

  59. IWishIWasAWallStreetGuy says:

    This presentation is not as interesting as the one from that slutty chick from Duke.

  60. says:


  61. Yogagirl says:

    You’re a pig. But I like how you were able to offend both Asians and women in less than a dozen words. At least you’re a more concise writer in your neanderthal-man commentary.

  62. Bruce says:

    so much for being detail oriented and checking over your work.

    “…I will appreciate it very much if you could do me favor to talk a look or forward them to other hiring managers.”

  63. Legally Blonde says:

    Was the presentation and resume printed on pink scented paper? Next!

  64. Jej78350 says:

    The girl appears to be Wenfeng (Sherry) Wang. Here’s her linkedin profile:

    She apparently also has a blog listing all of the great things she learns in her daily CFA studies…amazing:

    I bet most of her interviews are for the amusement of the bankers who will interview her….and yes, the typos in her presentation were hilarious.

  65. ...fuck says:

    As a fellow Washington University B. School student sending out applications, I would like to say: Thanks for lowering our reputation even further!

  66. Mr. Brightside says:

    On the bright side, that’s not possible.

  67. Guest says:

    Overqualified for Citi.

  68. Guest says:

    Isn’t it called University Career Services? weak.

  69. Texashedge says:

    Re: errors from the detial orientation slide: the omitted comma separating two parts of a compound sentence is much more important than the Oxford comma that she did actually use. In addition, “there are no mistakes” would probably be better than “there is no mistake”.

    Also, she’s clearly a Chinese spy.

  70. Texashedge says:

    I had sympathy for this “Sherry Wang” till I saw that her favorite book is Black Swan.

  71. Anon says:

    Even if I worked at Citi, I wouldn’t hire someone who said it was their dream job to work at Citi.

  72. Anonymous says:

    Umm… aren’t YOU the one assuming there’s a direct correlation between handjobs and Asians?

  73. She’s not even from this country, numbnuts.

  74. Anonymous says:

    I stopped right there: a) grammar is all wrong – grade inflation run amuck? and b) has she been reading the papers, even vik knows this is no “dream company”

  75. Anal_yst says:

    Clearly written by some HR hack

  76. Prince Harming says:

    What – Grumpy and Happy each went twice?

  77. Rho2Gamma says:

    I have never seen so much effort put forth to get a job with a company, that will lay you off 3 months after hiring. Instead of wasting the past 4 years not making money off of your assets, she should have worked for Emperors Club VIP. She would already be a commodities trader.

  78. Asiangirls > yogagirls says:

    You should invest in making me laugh

  79. As says:

    Ring the FUCKING BELLL!!!!!!!

  80. Joebags says:

    omg where to begin with this? holy cow!

  81. Frank_White says:

    Thank you so much for posting this Bess.

    Also, major CFA violation by saying your a “Tier 1″ level II candidate. That is grounds for expulsion from the program.

  82. This girl is going to have a tough time on the Sentence Correction section of the GMAT – keeping her out of business school AND thus MBA > CFA. The final nail in the coffin.

  83. The Joke Briefer says:

    The second, inferred “bon mot” is the misinterpretation of the number of dwarves asaccentuated by the humorist’s notation of where he/she is employed and in which occupation.

  84. MooseFister says:

    I see no humor in this.

    Kim Jong-il

  85. CaptainSlow says:

    Better still, “there is not a mistake,” indicating mistakes only happen one at a time and are rare.

  86. CheckurMotives says:

    I think she sees a correlation between happy endings and Asians. Clearly some motive examination is in order…

  87. trojan says:

    you’ve missed out on the fertile grounds of St. Louis

  88. Anonymous says:

    TJB: I love you. Nothing get by you ever, do it?


  89. General Disarray says:

    I never said she was Asian, I just pointed out that she’s a bad typist. Frankly, I’m deeply concerned about your using political correctness to make a gross generalization about the Asian people. So I think you should really examine your own inherent assumptions and motivations.

    Also, I just made the logical extension to being able to work three projects in hand. If she has that skill, it can be applied elsewhere. No neanderthal could have made such a stunning logical leap, thank you very much.

    Also, I like how you come across as an easily-offended man-hater who makes large assumptions about intent in three sentences.

  90. Jason STATHAM. says:

    This HAS to be fake.

  91. Poopneck Trader says:

    you sound hot. always liked my asians fiesty

  92. Anonymous says:

    The ppt that got me my current job was one bullet point:

    I have no morals, no ethics, no conscience and no problem prostituting myself for large sums of money

    No clipart either.

  93. Guest says:

    this is really going over everyone’s head….. the poor grammar and pp is a contrived tactic to illustrate she is a minority.

    -guy who ordered a lot of kamikaze shots during undergrad

  94. Chronology Expert says:

    Considering she’s already in business school and passing with flying colors, CFA > U of P (Phoenix) undergrad > MBA

  95. irish.curse says:

    you astutely put an ‘e’ between the ‘f’ and ‘r’ (vs. spelling it ‘Jeffries’)… hence you are a Jefferies analyst, perhaps a first year. MGHMOYS.

  96. You are right so let me clarify MBA in top 20. The bottom tier school she attended (unless she sucked the admission director’s dick in the interview) probably didn’t require GMAT – hence why she’s begging for a job that’s worse than being Steve Cohen’s pastry chef.

  97. tits says:

    See, that’s why I like you.

  98. Pluralizer says:

    great use of the plural form of “nothing”! if not previously in existence, great invention of the plural form of “nothing”!

  99. Chronology Expert says:

    Bottom tier? Check the top 20 lists…however note rankings have not been updated for class of 2010. Happy ending interview looking most likely.

  100. Guest says:

    Slide 5: Pls enlarge apple logo to demonstrate our ability to cover large-cap tech cos. Have updated draft on my chair by tom.

    Thx in adv.

    -Citi TMT MD

  101. Snob says:

    Also, there is a written portion of CFA Level 3 – which she will NEVER pass


  102. Citi HR says:

    Absolutely brilliant in the most awful of ways.

  103. Dick Fuld says:

    it’s i wish i were a wall street guy. if you don’t know how to use the subjunctive, you clearly don’t have what it takes

  104. Chinee says:

    She peed in my coke :(

  105. Anal_yst says:

    Or maybe she’s just not cut out for ibanking (let alone middle office) because she can’t craft anything even approximating coherent sentence? Alas, if her resume is to be believed and she has strong quant/programming skills, she’ll probably end up on a structured or credit derivatives desk as a fluffer or something in no time. 740 GMAT and she writes (and didn’t think to have it edited) like she’s FOB? Argh…

  106. Anal_yst says:

    That’s not an excuse for being unqualified for the position for which she’s applying. If she wants to do ibanking in the U.S. she should learn English (and the actual meaning of words/phrases like “detail-oriented”), otherwise, go work inAsia.

  107. Anonymous says:

    Thx Tits. xoxo

  108. Anonymous says:

    No kidding.

    Erich Hoeneker
    President Emeritus
    German Democratic Republic

  109. PJCap says:

    She might consider Ping Jiang Capital if citi doesn’t workout.

  110. I say tomato, you say Cassano says:

    You must be an actual AIG quant.

  111. Anonymous says:

    Not even a photo?

  112. Guest says:

    isn’t that redundant?

  113. Guest says:

    Wait, doesn’t she need to have a small cock?

  114. Guest says:

    Ugh, Ph.D. > MBA.

  115. Jim says:

    Why did she do this for Citi?

  116. PJCap says:

    It helps, but willingness to accept dry erase markers in any orifice will get you a 2nd

  117. Guest says:

    She’s not in business school (MBA), she’s an undergrad. MBAs do not apply for analyst positions.

  118. Guest says:

    wow, you’re a dumba$$

  119. Huh says:

    pmco = Yoda now?

  120. Guest says:

    besides slides 1-9, thought it was pretty good.

  121. Anonymous says:

    I thought that was the point of the vaguely “Asian” bamboo motif on the slide deck.

  122. LeeKing says:

    sorry no macs allowed in Citi infrastructure. FAIL

  123. Ya that’s what I thought but after Chrono’s comment I saw she said – “I’m graduating business school in Dec 2010, so I can start work in January 2011″.

    When I was in undergrad I never said I was in “business school” – then again this girl is applying for Citibank – so who knows.

  124. Guest says:

    that was obvious… your point?

  125. Anonymous says:

    Pluralizer & Huh: at the risk of pointing out the bleeding bloody obvious, it was a deliberate grammar joke. I love to showcase my written and oral skills.

  126. Anonymous says:

    No but that’s an excellent suggestion, Perma. Would you recommend I go with a headshot that shows off my double-jointed jaw or should I go with a waist up and show off the twins too?

  127. Guest says:

    GD I was thinking the same thing. The only way you get a Tier is if you fail and Tier 1 would mean you are the bottom 10 percentile of all people that failed….

    The whole reason the CFAI does not provide grades if you pass is to avoid statements like the one she is making! Certainly not DE Shaw material…

  128. Head of HR says:

    Perhaps by dream company she meant the federal government because technically…

  129. Anonymous says:

    Waist up, standing in front of a mirror, of course.

  130. Anonymous says:

    I was thinking on all fours, mouth open. Is the mirror idea better?

    Gal who loves Tits, Perma & EOPD for always being so helpful

    Btw EOPD spell checker suggested “wood” when I typed EOPD. How cool is that?

  131. Wusarah2009 says:

    I also very good at happy ending

  132. Anonymous says:

    Uncle Vik needs to hire this girl along with my man Luis Caselles Peréz. I mean, come on, one doesn’t need to be an AIG quant to realize the synergy.

    Mac Genius + Peréz’s good website skills = instant alpha

  133. IWishIWasAWallStreetGuy says:

    Actually, more literally correct is: IWishIWouldHaveBeenAWallStreetGuy but that’s a bit tedious. Even more literally correct is IWishIWouldHaveBeenASuccessfulWallStreetGuySoICouldRetireEarly but that’s getting down-right ridiculous.

    BTW: Judging from the research reports I’ve read, exceptional English skills do not seem to be a prerequisite so I question the accuracy of your statement.

  134. Nouveau Richie says:

    Someone posted her facebook profile, but it got removed. She has an open wall, so you can see all her statuses, here are some highlights:

    “How to learn American slangs?”

    “Two words to describe WashU Commencement–Honor and dream”

    “CFA bless! Project bless! Summer intern bless!”

    “Counting down for Skype IPO”

    “I really need a firm to spread my knowledge… Or I will be explosive”

  135. I’ve been telling people for years that the Irish Curse is a myth.

  136. Guest says:

    Ari Gold to Bob Ryan:

    “What if I told you I had a 22 inch cock, is that something you’d be interested in?”

  137. Rurur says:

    maths > engrish

  138. So your determination of “qualifications” for “ibanking” is that they properly conjugate their verbs in their second language?

    You’re an idiot.

  139. Anon says:

    When correcting somebody’s grammar, probably best to spell “amok” correctly.

  140. Guest says:

    It’s become a popular thing with undergrads majoring in business to throw around the “I’m in business school…” line these days to make themselves feel important.

  141. Anonymous says:

    do you often get lose and loose confused too? seriously, do your homework…you’re embarrassing your mom.

  142. Anal_yst says:

    Or: since investment banking eventually includes tasks such as drafting/editing/etc ppts and other documents in English, it’d be helpful if she knew how to communicate properly in this language. Additionally, as “attention to detail” is generally a trait required of investment bankers, it’s pretty embarrassing that while she brags about being so good at it, the material she supported clearly shows otherwise.

  143. flabbergasted says:

    Seriously, she’s “detail-oriented”and “good at finding mistakes” and she writes, “TALK A LOOK?”. This article is a joke, right?!

  144. Anonymous says:

    pmco, how about on all fours, mouth open, mirror behind?

  145. Chronology Expert says:

    Hard to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that when her presentation is full of contradictions and errors. I wouldn’t equate a business major with business school, and she also already graduated from undergrad in China (pre-req for CFA).

  146. guy who works at citi says:

    where are the typos?

  147. Anonymous says:

    Perma: Brilliant idea. One last question, what should I wear?

  148. Guest says:

    I don’t think Washington University uses a GPA scale in its MBA program

  149. In Search Of... says:

    We admire her tenacity and initiative and would be interested in having her interview for our boutique IB. If the author of the 11-page presentation entitled “I’m Always Awake With Citi: 9 Reasons Why You SHOULD Hire Me As Your Investment Banking Analyst” is reading this, please call: 212.398.8458.

  150. Colonel Sanders says:

    Has anyone made the “She should have included a slide that says ‘me love you long time;”. I apologize if I am late to the party, but just wanted to throw that out there – seems like it could really add value to her presentation.

  151. Anonymous says:

    Pmco, that would depend upon your target company now wouldn’t it?

  152. Anonymous says:

    snaps commentariat, excellent work today – i laughed and then cried

    off to west garden

  153. Guest says:

    I arso excited about rearning how to use rinking velbs

  154. ryesq says:

    I’m sure I could totally go to China, butcher their language and say “but but but, it’s my second language, what’s the problem?

  155. Vikrampandi says:

    I predict her Tier 1 suctioning skills will be tested.

  156. Kung-Fu Pandit says:

    Uh, no offence — but even the prodigious issue of this nation’s allegedly best colleges today can’t write in complete sentences. It’s the back office guys who can outspell them all.

    her Hail Mary Pass = Nice rack and a “winning smile”

    – A guy who weeps at our current state of affairs.

  157. Ashamed WUSTL student says:

    Anyone know her name. I go to WUSTL and want to make fun of her.

  158. 1handbridgeover says:

    All this risue talk leads me to believe pmco is a gay man posing as a man.

  159. Annika says:

    If she wanted to send this to JPM, she should change the font to Trebuchet MS

  160. Copyeditor to the Stars says:

    You were the first one to mention “talk a look” — congrats. I’d be happy to talk a look at your resume.

  161. Why don’t you focus your time more effectively and figure out how it’s possible you are going to get a job out of WUSTL.

  162. Hateforeigners says:

    All these idiots who can’t speak or write english even close to correctly. These foreign shits make it easy to be the best in your class at really any bank these days.

  163. Ubssucks says:

    UBS will hire her to join the Automotive IPO team

  164. warren says:

    This can’t be real.

  165. Moneyshot says:

    Ankles behind your ears lets people know that you’re open and approachable.

  166. Anonymous says:

    This is most certainly real. There’s an email thread spreading to alums like wildfire. It has her resume and presentation attached.

    Looks like it made it to a few of the analyst distribution lists

  167. Ashamed WUSTL Student says:

    Luckily I got one before this came out.

  168. guest says:

    I believe, in these forums, the follow up question might be:

    And what exactly was the paper scented with?

  169. Guest says:

    ^ guy who didn’t get accepted to WUSTL

  170. Charles Hanna says:

    I was hung up on her grammer until I realized that she is probably Chinese with English as a Second Language, and has the same problem most foreigners who learned English in their home country’s schools. The article and most of the identifying words such as “mine”, “that”, etc. are not used in Oriental languages as they are part of the word, and English classes in their home country don’t usually stress them. She is energetic, smart, has multi-language skills, and, probably, a host of contacts in China…hire her, and pair her with an English Major to edit her work.

  171. You're a gross generalization. says:

    First of all, you were clearly being racist. Second of all, she’s probably way to busy studying violin to give out handjobs.

  172. You're a gross generalization. says:

    Crap. I meant “too busy” for all you grammar Nazis. Goodbye credability, hello assumptions that all proofreaders are members of the National Socialist German Workers Party. Poland’s about to get even more boring.

  173. guest says:

    so you need 2 people to do the job? efficient.

  174. Yogagirl says:

    And you sound like you’re just an a$$. You can’t even come up with a clever retort or at least an interesting self descriptive screen name like Poopneck Trader above.

  175. Yogagirl says:

    English apparently isn’t her first language. So I’m cutting her some slack.

  176. Guest says:

    Then hopefully u r bilingual and have a GPA that’s at least comparable. Try not to humiliate yourself~~~haha good luck ;)

  177. Guest says:

    That’s why you do NOT get into Citi ;)

  178. Guest says:

    u know what? If the grammar mistake is from the presentation, that’s her fault for sure. If it’s from the e-mail, it’s highly possible that it’s from the journalist who wrote that parapragh without doublechecking. U people r so boring. So after reading such an article about how to successfully get attention from IB, the only thing u get is to make fun of this girl’s english? That’s why unemloyment rate in america is that high but banks still give her, an international student, an interview. Pathetic!

  179. Ex-Lazard says:

    She’s from China, hence a GPA from the Beijing Language and Culture University, where she presumably aced her English exams. Her nationality would explain this “creative”, very Chinesey attempt to differentiate herself. Maybe she would have gotten interviews with Goldman and Morgan Stanley if she mentioned CCP bigwig parents.

  180. another ashamed wustl student says:

    Sigh this is making my school look so bad…. they are accepting people who can’t write english….

  181. Gf4 says:

    how many of you jack offs can write a 95% grammatically accurate presentation in Mandarin?

  182. angry wustl student says:

    let’s make this clear. wustl > every other school. this woman got in for one reason only, because she is chinese

  183. i dont like tools says:

    this shit is riddled with spelling and grammatical errors, and she claims that she is a good writer and double checks her work before submission? you gotta be shitting me.

  184. Intelligent Wash U student says:

    As another WUSTL student, I would rather you not associate your tired and senseless bigotry with my diploma. It’s worse than the OP. Thanks.

    Incidentally, YEAH, all the affirmative action east Asian students get in higher education, right?!

  185. Ingo_Potsch says:

    The English is simply bad. But is that young lady from China? The sentences don’t seem to be so Chinese. I have been in China for several years and all this does not seem very Chinese. It reminds me rather of a different nation in Asia. Also, she seems to be not at all modest. I guess it is a hoax.

  186. not impressed says:

    Hear that? It’s the sound of EMPLOYED analysts all over NYC laughing uncontrollably as they forward this joke to everyone they know. Don’t waste time creating multi-page documents full of fluff to get a job. No one will take you seriously. This kind of crap goes straight into everyone recycling bin. And if you want a job in the USA, don’t butcher the language.

    • Tim Weaver says:

      and yet hundreds of people are applauding this effort. Goes to show the kind of morons working in the financial sector of this country. These people create nothing. Loan officers and stockbrokers are some of the dullest, dumbest fucking people you’ll ever meet.

  187. san says:

    She deserve to be selected
    Atleast she has taken some initiative

  188. Gues says:

    Dear applicant,

    If you have studied the principles of personal development that include weight-lifting, brick breaking, aprés-skiing, tennis volley and last but not least, salsa dancing, please do not hesitate to contact us.

    -UBS HR

  189. AlanH says:

    Her grammer is shocking. Also, she should know that you cannot imply you are "Tier 1" or tier anything as a CFA student or charterholder. That's covered in the ethics section of Level I. So I'd check her qualifications carefully.

  190. GreenMil says:

    Her grammer, or her grammar? Pot, kettle.

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  191. Kettle says:

    grammer grammar, it's still atrocious… and he's right about the CFA usage.

  192. A Realist says:

    This was leaked by a Citi HR representative? That is truly outrageous. The kid is just trying to find a job in a tough industry and environment… their initiative should be welcomed. At the very least not leaked and globally mocked.

    I try and pretend to myself that this industry actually has some OK people in its midst. But no, they're mostly all robotic scum. Geckko was a generous simulacrum for the real core.

  193. Guest says:

    Geckko would have been an admin assistant in my office . .

  194. lol wut says:

    The communicative slide just kills me

  195. David says:

    "I also have great writing skills and have earned many composition prizes."

    I just snorted and laughed out loud in McDonalds and everybody looked at me like wtf

  196. J Corzine says:

    I have a job that's perfect for you. I need someone to locate misplaced funds as I'm having a tough time with the regulators. When can you start?

  197. Guest says:

    As much fun as it is for you posters to identify a person that you perceive as dumber than you, has anyone considered that this person might be Chinese and English is their second language ?

    • guest says:

      Has anyone ever considered that this is America and you should speak American if you're applying to American jobs? Just an idea.

      • Guest says:

        You mean like "Howdy" and "Kawfee"? Give the person a break…not everyone graduated Magnum Gun Lauda….

      • Pedantic Guy says:

        Yes most people here have. We decided that rather than speak "American" we'll opt to use this funny language called English.

        PS If you're going to be an asshole, try not to appear like an idiot as well.

        • UBS HR female says:

          PS If you're going to be judging other people posts while trying to sound witty, at least come up with a good line. You appeared as an asshole, an idiot and a douche bag yourself. You one upped the previous poster, nice job!

        • 10xLevered says:

          Aren't comments supposed to be funny?

    • Dranoes says:

      Definitely considered. There was a whiff of Engrish clinging to the whole thing.

  198. Reneged says:

    Dear Applicant –

    Just reread your powerpoints . . . realized you only raised $200 at your charity event. Please don't come in next Monday.

    -Citi HR

  199. A for effort says:

    The kid who wrote this shows far too much initiative and originality to be a good IB analyst.
    Also Washington University is not a "target school." Kid will probably never even get an auto-reply.

  200. Interning4ever says:

    "talk a look"? seriously? and what about the parallelism we've all learned so hard for SAT?

  201. DUWOLV says:

    She's obviously not a native English speaker. Her grammatical mistakes are very typical of people who speak Chinese as a first language. Imagine trying to write coherently in a language with completely different grammatical structures! While it's no excuse for writing badly, especially if you want a job in America -she shouldn't be made fun of!

  202. Sandusky says:

    What happened to making fun of people on this site without having to worry about being reprimanded by a person with a conscience? The person who put this presentation together is obviously Linsane

  203. kav says:

    laugh all u want but can any of u speak a Chinese language? not his/her first language, and it shows but she'll have the last laugh someday…. ppl with that kinda drive get to places and they will improve their english as well..

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