This is just an FYI for anyone doing some risk/reward analysis re: whether or not freeing up the funds to buy unlimited lap dances by screwing clients is worth it– much to the chagrin of one Bloomberg columnist, you’re really just looking at a relative slap on the wrist.

Then there is Keith Epstein. In a criminal complaint filed in the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Michigan on Nov. 22, a Federal Bureau of Investigation agent said the former broker had taken money from mostly elderly investors, indulging in jaunts at strip clubs, online gambling, and even handing over signed, blank checks to three exotic dancers. Ron Chapman, a Bloomfield Hills, Michigan lawyer who is handling $8 million in claims against Epstein, says one investor entrusted new money to Epstein as recently as three months ago.

Michigan took away Epstein’s three insurance licenses in October 2009, describing his actions as “thievery” in a news release. Finra barred him from the securities business for two years beginning Jan. 20, 2009, a lenient temporary ouster considering they said he’d engaged in “misuse” of investor money. Why should any broker be let back in once that’s happened?

Madoff Country Club Tips Give Timeless Lesson [Bloomberg]

51 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (51)

  1. Posted by Guest | December 1, 2010 at 4:43 PM

    I gotta make some calls.

  2. Posted by General Disarray | December 1, 2010 at 4:46 PM

    FINRA understands. FINRA also likes the strippers and guys are bound to make mistakes when they have stripper tits in their face.

  3. Posted by buckettrader | December 1, 2010 at 4:49 PM

    No big deal, this happens at ____ all the time

  4. Posted by Guest | December 1, 2010 at 4:54 PM

    But Epstein was drunk. Where is this world coming to if everyone’s held accountable for stuff he does when drunk.

  5. Posted by Anonymous | December 1, 2010 at 4:55 PM

    Since when is it a crime to indulge in jaunts at strip clubs, gamble online, and sign over blank checks to strippers? Before you know it they will take away our rights to fund human trafficking, boy soldiers in Sierra Leone and Pelosi’s cadaver face botox treatments.


  6. Posted by Older But Wiser | December 1, 2010 at 4:57 PM

    If you are wearing light colored clothing, never get a lap dance from a topless dancer who had burritos for supper.

    -Someone Who Found Out the Hard Way

  7. Posted by Guest | December 1, 2010 at 4:59 PM

    Getting caught siphoning money from Gertrude’s annuity account to fund a night watching Cinnamon dance to a horrible remix of “Tempted to Touch” is the NKI

  8. Posted by Jriems | December 1, 2010 at 4:59 PM

    I just have to know what the strippers cashed the blank checks for? Any idea?

  9. Posted by Anonymous | December 1, 2010 at 5:01 PM

    Or if you are in Norway and she is wearing a red bracelet

  10. Posted by Guest | December 1, 2010 at 5:09 PM

    To purchase a perfume that emits an essence that is a mix of baby powder, spring flowers, and Daddy issues.

  11. Posted by Guest | December 1, 2010 at 5:16 PM

    Thanks for sharing.

  12. Posted by Calvin Johnson | December 1, 2010 at 5:26 PM

    Hmmm…this guy overpaid. In the Detroit area you can get that kind of service for canned food, a 40oz and a Twix bar (in case she has a kid, you know…)

  13. Posted by Intellectual Masturbator | December 1, 2010 at 6:31 PM

    …and syphillis is the new STI.

  14. Posted by Full Contact Lap dances | December 1, 2010 at 7:31 PM

    We must go to the same clubs.

  15. Posted by Full Contact Lap dances | December 1, 2010 at 7:31 PM

    We must go to the same clubs.

  16. Posted by CFA1 | December 1, 2010 at 8:29 PM

    Writing a blank check may have advantages over the unbranded ATM in the foyer.

  17. Posted by Hot Dish | December 1, 2010 at 8:56 PM

    Using the word “supper” put your post over the top for me. Bravo.

  18. Posted by BankrGirl | December 2, 2010 at 12:39 AM

    He actually said, “Any one got 75 cents, I’m tryin’ to buy a textured ribbed condom from the PUMP.” Just doesn’t happen.

  19. Posted by ST1 | December 3, 2010 at 1:36 PM

    Bro’s before Ho’s

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