Archive for December 2010

In recent weeks, we’ve received word that RBS will be “downsizing” bonuses by “at least” 30 percent this year; that it may lay off around ten percent of the staff in the coming months; and that employees have had their holiday party celebrations capped at one bag of (fun size) chips per head. So we were in need of some good news for the royalest bank of Scotland and here it is– these chippies can throw a party! Specifically, one centered around a children’s novel, which set the firm back a pretty penny but you know what? It was worth it and sorry, they’re not sorry. Read more »

Reuters reports Alabama-based Harbert Management Corp, which invested $25 million with Phil Falcone to give him his start in 2001, has “begun to pull [its] investments from Harbinger,” while putting money with a newer, younger distressed debt trader, Greg Jordan, who will run Harbert Credit Opportunities Fund, which opens February 1. Harbert is said to have high hopes for Jordan, though no word on whether or not he’ll be able to compete with Falcone when it comes to a taste for the finer things in life or barnyard animals who perform burlesque shows. [Reuters]


Also, Chaz thinks all of this has gone too far, and just because something “smells bad” doesn’t mean it’s illegal.

Need a little Monday afternoon depression? Here’s some, courtesy of the Madoff family, re: this weekend’s news. Read more »

From the random walking on set, the declaration of love for Lloyd Blankfein, the lack of an indoor voice, the accusation that David Faber dyes his hair and later, the shoulder squeezes and kisses on the head, KL’s got regular contributor material written all over him. Just something to think about. Read more »


UBS has issued a 44-page dress code to employees. Unfortunately, our French is a bit rusty so beyond telling female employees to wear pearl necklaces and scarves and men to wear shirts, it’s unclear what exactly they’re saying or if removing one’s cock ring before work is a Do or a Don’t. One thing that is helpful, if you’ve somehow managed to obtain and hold a job on Wall Street (and or made it past your 13th birthday) without ever learning to tie a tie? This handy how-to guide: Read more »

No hard numbers yet but apparently enough for one guy to buy a round of shots worth $36,890, “humbling” Tokyo’s traders. Read more »

When you walk out of the office and down the street today, are you planning on asking some strangers their opinion on whether or not you should get paid this year? No? Well give it a shot- the answers may surprise you, if you were under the impression the general population thinks you deserve that money. Apparently they don’t but they do have some ideas about how you should be compensated moving forward. Here’s what 70 percent of Americans have come up with– you get nothing. Read more »

  • 13 Dec 2010 at 8:29 AM

Opening Bell: 12.13.10

A Secretive Banking Elite Rules Trading In Derivatives (NYT)
On the third Wednesday of every month, the nine members of an elite Wall Street society gather in Midtown Manhattan. The men share a common goal: to protect the interests of big banks in the vast market for derivatives, one of the most profitable — and controversial — fields in finance. They also share a common secret: The details of their meetings, even their identities, have been strictly confidential. Drawn from giants like JPMorgan Chase, Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley, the bankers form a powerful committee that helps oversee trading in derivatives, instruments which, like insurance, are used to hedge risk. In theory, this group exists to safeguard the integrity of the multitrillion-dollar market. In practice, it also defends the dominance of the big banks. The banks in this group, which is affiliated with a new derivatives clearinghouse, have fought to block other banks from entering the market, and they are also trying to thwart efforts to make full information on prices and fees freely available.

Wall Street Sees Record Revenue In Recovery From Bailout (Bloomberg)
The five largest U.S. firms by investment-banking and trading revenue — Goldman Sachs, JPMorgan, Bank of America, Citigroup and Morgan Stanley — will likely have a better fourth quarter than the previous two periods, driven by equity underwriting and higher volume in stock and bond trading, according to data compiled by Bloomberg. Even if this quarter only matches the third, the banks’ revenue will top that of any year except 2009.

Tax Deal Is Set To Pass Senate (WSJ)
Democratic Rep. Chris Van Hollen of Maryland, a top adviser to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, predicted Sunday that some sort of tax deal would pass in the House before the current session ends. The House is “very focused on getting a comprehensive tax compromise passed by the end of the year,” Mr. Van Hollen said in an interview. If Republicans won’t alter the estate-tax provision, he added, “then we have to go from there.”

Suicide Won’t End Madoff Lawsuits (WSJ)
In case you were wondering.

German Finance Minister: Don’t Bet Against Euro (AP)
In an interview to appear on Sunday in Bild am Sonntag newspaper, Schaeuble said leaders of all the countries that share the currency agreed — the euro worked toward their common good and a return to national money would be a mistake. “Those who bet their money against the euro will have no success… the euro will not fail,” Schaeuble said. “The euro benefits us all and we will defend it successfully.”

Julian Assange Boasted About ‘Asian Teengirl Stalkers’ In Online Dating Profile (Gawker)
So now you know. Read more »

  • 11 Dec 2010 at 11:46 AM

Write-Offs: 12.11.10

$$$ Very sad news: Bernie’s son Mark Madoff has committed suicide (CNN thinks we wrote about him crying yesterday; the story was from a year ago). [NYP, DB]

$$$ Life After Madoff’s Big Lie [WSJ]

$$$ Madoff Trustee Seeks $19.6 Billion From Austrian Banker

$$$ Matthew Goldstein: Boston Emerges As Hub Of Insider Trading Probe [Reuters] Read more »

Let’s just hope/assume this is nothing more than wishful thinking on the part of someone who hates fleece and hedge funds and all things magic. Read more »