• 17 Mar 2011 at 1:30 PM

First Annual Dealbreaker NCAA Tournament Challenge: Opening Thoughts

By

To everyone who signed up- congratulations on making the right call. As one component of the prize package is dinner at Peter Luger, which does not take credit cards, I’m most excited to meet the winner in an alley to pass off an envelope stuffed with cash.** Now, some words and numbers from your Pool Manager, Dealbreaker Commenter and Friend, NakedShort.

“772 people filed out brackets. I specify ‘filled out’ because 70 people signed up and didn’t input any picks and for that should be ashamed. You went through the trouble of clicking the link, either creating or logging into your CBS account and then couldn’t be bothered to spend a maximum of 5 minutes to complete a bracket. However, I am not sure if that’s worse than taking the time to actually complete a bracket and not inputting the tiebreaker of total points in the title game.

24.35% of the field picked Kansas to win the tournament. As a diehard KU fan I can coach the other 204 folks that picked them on how to handle the upcoming crushing second round defeat to UNLV.

23.16% of you picked Ohio State not realizing that the only thing Ohio State has a chance of winning is the soon be announced Fencing Athletic Department Goods for Cash and/or Tattoos Tournament.

15.56% picked Duke, most likely in hopes of heading down to Durham after the tournament to tell some girl how you just won a big tourney pool in an attempt to end up an entry in a PowerPoint presentation about fucking.

Special thanks to those that filled out the tournament with Fuck You Winners like Texas A&M, Illinois, Missouri, Wisconsin and Purdue.”

**We actually haven’t yet worked out the details of how we’ll do this but the aforementioned scenario is what I’m hoping for.

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Comments (128)

Newer Comments
  1. 1
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 5:40 PM

    That’s one hell of a “Fuck You Winners” list – if any of them win, I’ll never fill out another NCAA bracket.

  2. 2
    Posted by Chuddy | March 17, 2011 at 5:40 PM

    a UBS analyst must have picked Illinois to win it all………….

  3. 3
    Posted by RomanticQuant | March 17, 2011 at 5:42 PM

    FUCK YOU WINNERS!

    /Antoine Dodson’s epitaph.

  4. 4
    Posted by Jeeves | March 17, 2011 at 5:44 PM

    My “Butler to win it all” pick is looking pretty good so far.

  5. 5
    Posted by Savage Manatee | March 17, 2011 at 5:48 PM

    An envelope stuffed with Bess Bucks is good enough for me.

    /FOREX baller

  6. 6
    Posted by Savage Manatee | March 17, 2011 at 5:48 PM

    An envelope stuffed with Bess Bucks is good enough for me.

    /FOREX baller

  7. 7
    Posted by Guest | March 17, 2011 at 5:57 PM

    How often can we expect to see updates of the consolidated standings for the three different pools/groups?

  8. 8
    Posted by Creepy guy | March 17, 2011 at 5:59 PM

    Meeting Bess in a dark alley is the NKI

  9. 9
    Posted by Oswald Gruebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    wheres the kill yourself button

  10. 10
    Posted by Oswald Gruebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    wheres the kill yourself button

  11. 11
    Posted by Brian1284 | March 17, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    BU Terriers, all the way.

  12. 12
    Posted by Brian1284 | March 17, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    BU Terriers, all the way.

  13. 13
    Posted by Brian1284 | March 17, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    BU Terriers, all the way.

  14. 14
    Posted by Brian1284 | March 17, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    BU Terriers, all the way.

  15. 15
    Posted by I AM A CREEPER | March 17, 2011 at 6:03 PM

    Is the dinner at Luger’s candlelit with Bess?

    (looks around and starts masturbating optimistically)

  16. 16
    Posted by I AM A CREEPER | March 17, 2011 at 6:03 PM

    Is the dinner at Luger’s candlelit with Bess?

    (looks around and starts masturbating optimistically)

  17. 17
    Posted by I AM A CREEPER | March 17, 2011 at 6:03 PM

    Is the dinner at Luger’s candlelit with Bess?

    (looks around and starts masturbating optimistically)

  18. 18
    Posted by I AM A CREEPER | March 17, 2011 at 6:03 PM

    Is the dinner at Luger’s candlelit with Bess?

    (looks around and starts masturbating optimistically)

  19. 19
    Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | March 17, 2011 at 6:07 PM

    In other words, 63.07% of the pool are former AIG quants.

  20. 20
    Posted by Guest | March 17, 2011 at 6:15 PM

    Optimistically masturbating is the NKI.

  21. 21
    Posted by One of the 70 | March 17, 2011 at 6:23 PM

    So you wanted us to fill out the bracket?

  22. 22
    Posted by Guest | March 17, 2011 at 6:26 PM

    It was a reasonable question, and I’m still interested in the answer. But thanks for the retarded comment with no value add!

  23. 23
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:36 PM

    No way I am doing the updates on a Saturday morning. Updates will be on Mondays after the previous weekends games.

    If you dont like it you can meet me at Minetta’s…

  24. 24
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:36 PM

    No way I am doing the updates on a Saturday morning. Updates will be on Mondays after the previous weekends games.

    If you dont like it you can meet me at Minetta’s…

  25. 25
    Posted by DPD | March 17, 2011 at 6:39 PM

    Winter break was a couple of weeks ago.. I went to the Daniel Tosh show at the Fox Theatre on like a Friday, maybe it was Saturday.. Buddy and I had a few too pops and ended up wasted by midnight.. We were pulled over by Detroit PD, in my dad’s S550 Benz on our way back to the burbs.. “You boys had anything to drink?”

    re, “Absolutely not officer.”

    “Alright, appreciate you boys coming down here, but don’t make yourself a target.. next time leave your daddy’s car at home. Drive safe.”

    Ran my ID, and let me drive home wasted. My life could have been ruined. Thank you Detroit Police. Between this encounter and the guy who flew his Porsche into a house, I don’t think I’ll ever drink and drive again.

    Oh, and Notre Dame is going to win it all.

  26. 26
    Posted by DPD | March 17, 2011 at 6:39 PM

    Winter break was a couple of weeks ago.. I went to the Daniel Tosh show at the Fox Theatre on like a Friday, maybe it was Saturday.. Buddy and I had a few too pops and ended up wasted by midnight.. We were pulled over by Detroit PD, in my dad’s S550 Benz on our way back to the burbs.. “You boys had anything to drink?”

    re, “Absolutely not officer.”

    “Alright, appreciate you boys coming down here, but don’t make yourself a target.. next time leave your daddy’s car at home. Drive safe.”

    Ran my ID, and let me drive home wasted. My life could have been ruined. Thank you Detroit Police. Between this encounter and the guy who flew his Porsche into a house, I don’t think I’ll ever drink and drive again.

    Oh, and Notre Dame is going to win it all.

  27. 27
    Posted by NYRebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:40 PM

    Kansas over the Rebels??? We will see, we will see…
    - NY Rebel aka woefully optomistic alum

  28. 28
    Posted by NYRebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:40 PM

    Kansas over the Rebels??? We will see, we will see…
    - NY Rebel aka woefully optomistic alum

  29. 29
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 6:40 PM

    Wait, Bess isn’t coming with to dinner?

  30. 30
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 6:40 PM

    Wait, Bess isn’t coming with to dinner?

  31. 31
    Posted by ncvbanker | March 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM

    If someone from NC wins the pool, can we go to Shooters II instead of Beamers?

  32. 32
    Posted by ncvbanker | March 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM

    If someone from NC wins the pool, can we go to Shooters II instead of Beamers?

  33. 33
    Posted by NYRebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM

    P.S. NakedShort – I want to meet you in the ally behind Lugars; you better have that envelope of money.

  34. 34
    Posted by NYRebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM

    P.S. NakedShort – I want to meet you in the ally behind Lugars; you better have that envelope of money.

  35. 35
    Posted by NYRebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM

    P.S. NakedShort – I want to meet you in the ally behind Lugars; you better have that envelope of money.

  36. 36
    Posted by Heywood | March 17, 2011 at 6:42 PM

    How will I know you? Or will you be the short naked guy?

    /Guy who just likes to meet people at Minetta’s

  37. 37
    Posted by Heywood | March 17, 2011 at 6:42 PM

    How will I know you? Or will you be the short naked guy?

    /Guy who just likes to meet people at Minetta’s

  38. 38
    Posted by Heywood | March 17, 2011 at 6:42 PM

    How will I know you? Or will you be the short naked guy?

    /Guy who just likes to meet people at Minetta’s

  39. 39
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    Can the entire earth stop being an asshole for a fucking week so I can dick around on dealbreaker without constant interruptions that the world is ending. Really starting to piss me off.

  40. 40
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    Can the entire earth stop being an asshole for a fucking week so I can dick around on dealbreaker without constant interruptions that the world is ending. Really starting to piss me off.

  41. 41
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    Can the entire earth stop being an asshole for a fucking week so I can dick around on dealbreaker without constant interruptions that the world is ending. Really starting to piss me off.

  42. 42
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:45 PM

    Driving drunk is TNKI

    -Edward “Ted” Kennedy

  43. 43
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:45 PM

    Driving drunk is TNKI

    -Edward “Ted” Kennedy

  44. 44
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:45 PM

    Driving drunk is TNKI

    -Edward “Ted” Kennedy

  45. 45
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:45 PM

    Ill be the guy drinking Chablis on ice eating my own dandruff. Compliment me on my rat tail so I know its you.

  46. 46
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:45 PM

    Ill be the guy drinking Chablis on ice eating my own dandruff. Compliment me on my rat tail so I know its you.

  47. 47
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:45 PM

    Ill be the guy drinking Chablis on ice eating my own dandruff. Compliment me on my rat tail so I know its you.

  48. 48
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:46 PM

    I think it was stated that Bojangles and bottle service at The Tilted Kilt would be the prize.

  49. 49
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:46 PM

    I think it was stated that Bojangles and bottle service at The Tilted Kilt would be the prize.

  50. 50
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:46 PM

    I think it was stated that Bojangles and bottle service at The Tilted Kilt would be the prize.

  51. 51
    Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | March 17, 2011 at 6:50 PM

    Fuck you Butler. Fuck you.

  52. 52
    Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | March 17, 2011 at 6:50 PM

    Fuck you Butler. Fuck you.

  53. 53
    Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | March 17, 2011 at 6:50 PM

    Fuck you Butler. Fuck you.

  54. 54
    Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | March 17, 2011 at 6:50 PM

    Fuck you Butler. Fuck you.

  55. 55
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:52 PM

    Trying too hard is TNKI

  56. 56
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:52 PM

    Trying too hard is TNKI

  57. 57
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:52 PM

    Trying too hard is TNKI

  58. 58
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 6:52 PM

    Trying too hard is TNKI

  59. 59
    Posted by Darkness | March 17, 2011 at 6:53 PM

    Fuck yo couch!

  60. 60
    Posted by Darkness | March 17, 2011 at 6:53 PM

    Fuck yo couch!

  61. 61
    Posted by Darkness | March 17, 2011 at 6:53 PM

    Fuck yo couch!

  62. 62
    Posted by Darkness | March 17, 2011 at 6:53 PM

    Fuck yo couch!

  63. 63
    Posted by AIGquant | March 17, 2011 at 6:56 PM

    Fuck you butler, I deemed you inferrior but u proved me wrong.

  64. 64
    Posted by AIGquant | March 17, 2011 at 6:56 PM

    Fuck you butler, I deemed you inferrior but u proved me wrong.

  65. 65
    Posted by AIGquant | March 17, 2011 at 6:56 PM

    Fuck you butler, I deemed you inferrior but u proved me wrong.

  66. 66
    Posted by AIGquant | March 17, 2011 at 6:56 PM

    Fuck you butler, I deemed you inferrior but u proved me wrong.

  67. 67
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:58 PM

    Currently there are 354 folks tied for 1st with 2 points.

  68. 68
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 6:58 PM

    Currently there are 354 folks tied for 1st with 2 points.

  69. 69
    Posted by Oswald Gruebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:59 PM

    wheres the downvote button

  70. 70
    Posted by Oswald Gruebel | March 17, 2011 at 6:59 PM

    wheres the downvote button

  71. 71
    Posted by Darkness | March 17, 2011 at 7:04 PM

    How can they all go to Lugers?

    /Applebee’s Quant

  72. 72
    Posted by Darkness | March 17, 2011 at 7:04 PM

    How can they all go to Lugers?

    /Applebee’s Quant

  73. 73
    Posted by Jacob Moore | March 17, 2011 at 7:06 PM

    Fuck me? Fuck YOU!

  74. 74
    Posted by Jacob Moore | March 17, 2011 at 7:06 PM

    Fuck me? Fuck YOU!

  75. 75
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 7:09 PM

    What – you had Old Dominion winning it all?

  76. 76
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 7:09 PM

    What – you had Old Dominion winning it all?

  77. 77
    Posted by DPD | March 17, 2011 at 7:13 PM

    If I win I want the proceeds to go to MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving). I’ll pay for dinner with that dame Bess — I already made the reservation at the Breslin.

  78. 78
    Posted by Ray Finkle | March 17, 2011 at 7:18 PM

    Erotomania (Clérambault’s syndrome) is the NKI

    -Guy who is creeped out by DPD’s affinity with Bess

  79. 79
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 7:19 PM

    If it were a mullet, I would be SO there.

  80. 80
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 7:19 PM

    If it were a mullet, I would be SO there.

  81. 81
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 7:19 PM

    If it were a mullet, I would be SO there.

  82. 82
    Posted by Mary Jo Kopechne | March 17, 2011 at 7:21 PM

    Tell me about it

  83. 83
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 7:36 PM

    Forget the alley Bess. Parking structure, orange section.

  84. 84
    Posted by Birther | March 17, 2011 at 7:41 PM

    Is it too late to enter my bracket?

    West Coast Quant

  85. 85
    Posted by TheLibyans | March 17, 2011 at 7:56 PM

    I think the Nikkei needs some optimistic masturbating.

    /The Emerpor

  86. 86
    Posted by TheLibyans | March 17, 2011 at 7:56 PM

    I think the Nikkei needs some optimistic masturbating.

    /The Emerpor

  87. 87
    Posted by AIGee | March 17, 2011 at 7:57 PM

    Do the Optimists beat off differently than Rotarians? I did not know that.

    -AIG Quant

  88. 88
    Posted by Fightin' Texas Aggie | March 17, 2011 at 8:03 PM

    If we win I’ll make it rain Washingtons at Beamers

  89. 89
    Posted by Brah | March 17, 2011 at 8:08 PM

    Bess – Post your picks.

  90. 90
    Posted by Brah | March 17, 2011 at 8:08 PM

    Bess – Post your picks.

  91. 91
    Posted by Jacob Moore | March 17, 2011 at 8:10 PM

    morehead state…

  92. 92
    Posted by Jacob Moore | March 17, 2011 at 8:10 PM

    morehead state…

  93. 93
    Posted by Prince | March 17, 2011 at 8:11 PM

    Game…Blouses!

  94. 94
    Posted by Prince | March 17, 2011 at 8:11 PM

    Game…Blouses!

  95. 95
    Posted by Prince | March 17, 2011 at 8:11 PM

    Game…Blouses!

  96. 96
    Posted by Prince | March 17, 2011 at 8:11 PM

    Game…Blouses!

  97. 97
    Posted by Prince | March 17, 2011 at 8:11 PM

    Game…Blouses!

  98. 98
    Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | March 17, 2011 at 8:13 PM

    Fuck Morehead too!

  99. 99
    Posted by CT | March 17, 2011 at 8:19 PM

    It’s for the winner and three people of his/her choice. So you could make her come if you want.

  100. 100
    Posted by GGGuest | March 17, 2011 at 8:22 PM

    Indeed.

  101. 101
    Posted by Elliot Rosewater | March 17, 2011 at 8:23 PM

    Good ole Notre Dame.

  102. 102
    Posted by Generous Gerbil | March 17, 2011 at 8:23 PM

    I am surprisingly not in a moorehead state of mind.

  103. 103
    Posted by Generous Gerbil | March 17, 2011 at 8:23 PM

    I am surprisingly not in a moorehead state of mind.

  104. 104
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 8:26 PM

    Another premature exit from Patino’s boys

  105. 105
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 8:26 PM

    Another premature exit from Patino’s boys

  106. 106
    Posted by NakedShort | March 17, 2011 at 8:26 PM

    Another premature exit from Patino’s boys

  107. 107
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 8:30 PM

    OK – I have to admit, the Morehead State thing will sting a little.

  108. 108
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    Totally see what you did there and approve. Should have named my team PremiePitino.

  109. 109
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    Totally see what you did there and approve. Should have named my team PremiePitino.

  110. 110
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    Totally see what you did there and approve. Should have named my team PremiePitino.

  111. 111
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 9:20 PM

    That Louisville loss just blew up my bracket like a nuclear reactor

    Too soon???

  112. 112
    Posted by Perfection_Personified | March 17, 2011 at 9:32 PM

    I will dominate this contest next year when I’m not busy doing more important things. So far, my bracket is perfect. I expect it to remain that way.

  113. 113
    Posted by Sen Dick Lugar (R) | March 17, 2011 at 10:03 PM

    Bess is correct, I don’t take credit cards but I do take bags or envelopes full of cash.

  114. 114
    Posted by Guest | March 17, 2011 at 10:11 PM

    I’m for more head!

    - Guy who wants to know if you saw what I did there.

  115. 115
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 10:19 PM

    Hourly (NakedShort doesn’t know this yet).

  116. 116
    Posted by Anonymous | March 17, 2011 at 10:19 PM

    Hourly (NakedShort doesn’t know this yet).

  117. 117
    Posted by Bishop Bracket Buster | March 17, 2011 at 10:20 PM

    You know, I could break the club record, theoretically

  118. 118
    Posted by Bishop Bracket Buster | March 17, 2011 at 10:20 PM

    You know, I could break the club record, theoretically

  119. 119
    Posted by Optimist | March 17, 2011 at 11:51 PM

    I think many people want to make her come…but is that possible? She seems ephemeral….

  120. 120
    Posted by Guest | March 18, 2011 at 1:52 AM

    Round 1…or against ND?

  121. 121
    Posted by Guest | March 18, 2011 at 1:52 AM

    Round 1…or against ND?

  122. 122
    Posted by Coleman | March 18, 2011 at 1:58 AM

    It’s a whirlpool bath sir…..I think you’ll enjoy it….

  123. 123
    Posted by Supraman | March 18, 2011 at 2:52 AM

    Vandy down, and I’m pretty sure I’m out of the running.

  124. 124
    Posted by CT | March 18, 2011 at 4:57 AM

    I really wish you knew the definition of the word “ephemeral” otherwise you’d know it made no sense in the context of whether a person can or cannot be made to come.

  125. 125
    Posted by SRH | March 18, 2011 at 4:58 AM

    Very, very possible.

  126. 126
    Posted by Gnick88 | March 18, 2011 at 2:13 PM

    How are Wisconsin and Purdue “fuck you winners”? Both those teams are really good.

  127. 127
    Posted by Gnick88 | March 18, 2011 at 2:13 PM

    How are Wisconsin and Purdue “fuck you winners”? Both those teams are really good.

  128. 128
    Posted by cheap oem software | May 3, 2012 at 7:39 AM

    Z9px4I wow, awesome blog post. Great.

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