This Just In: Wall Street Offers People Unlimited Chances To Fuck Up

When Bear Stearns went down for the dirt nap three years ago to the day (more on the anniversary later), many people assumed having the firm listed as a one-time employer on the résumé would be the equivalent of pulling a Merrill, i.e. it would make you categorically unemployable. Apparently these people had never heard of a guy named John Meriweather who, despite being forced to sign up investors for his latest fund down at the dog track, is proof positive that you can blow it or work for a place that (spectacularly) blows it and it will in no way affect your future prospects. According to Bloomberg and former BSC chairman Ace Greenberg, most Bear execs have “landed on their feet.”

Three years after the collapse of Bear Stearns Cos., which helped fuel the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression, former bond executives of the firm are running businesses at one-time rivals, including Bank of America and Goldman Sachs…Among the most highly placed members of the Bear Stearns diaspora are Michael B. Nierenberg, 48, who’s now in charge of Bank of America’s global mortgage and securitized-products business; Jeffrey L. Verschleiser, 41, who runs mortgage operations at Goldman Sachs; and Scott Eichel, 36, now Royal Bank of Scotland Plc’s global head of securitized products and U.S. credit trading…Nierenberg, who oversaw adjustable-rate debt at Bear Stearns, and Verschleiser, whose purview included subprime loans, were co-heads of the New York-based firm’s U.S. mortgage business until they were promoted in late 2007, when Eichel and another trader took the posts.

Other Bear Stearns bond executives landing at rival banks include its last co-heads of global fixed income, Jeffrey Mayer and Craig Overlander, both 51. Mayer now runs the North America region for the securities unit of Frankfurt-based Deutsche Bank AG (DBK), whose sales and trading revenue rose 30 percent last quarter while five big rivals posted an average 8 percent decline. Overlander is deputy chief executive officer of Societe Generale (GLE)’s investment-bank division for the Americas. Thomas Marano, 49, global head of mortgages, rates and foreign exchange at Bear Stearns, is now CEO of the mortgage unit of Ally Financial Inc., the auto and home lender rescued by the U.S. government. Randy Reiff, 40, Bear Stearns’s head of commercial-mortgage finance and commercial-mortgage securities, now holds a similar role at Australia’s Macquarie Group. Japan’s Mitsubishi UFJ Securities USA is relying on Bear Stearns alumni in corporate bonds, including James Gorman, its managing director of high-yield capital markets.

And for those of you thinking of citing the jobless Jimmy Cayne in a misguided attempt to debunk this theory, bite thy tongues. Cayne could get a job at any firm on Wall Street, he just prefers unemployment and has been working on a project that requires his undivided attention. Details TK.

Bear Stearns Thrives In Diaspora [Bloomberg]

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59 Responses to “This Just In: Wall Street Offers People Unlimited Chances To Fuck Up”

  1. PasteSpecialFormats says:

    We think this is a great policy, people getting as many chances as they need.

    -The Mikes (Vick, Tyson, and Milken)

  2. PasteSpecialFormats says:

    We think this is a great policy, people getting as many chances as they need.

    -The Mikes (Vick, Tyson, and Milken)

  3. £10 says:

    You assist in running a company into the ground and you get to assist at another company. Yet you yell at some health workers that decided to protest instead of work, and you become a pariah.
    -Suspended Deutsche Bank Employee co-signed by chuckles.

  4. Texashedge says:

    In all seriousness: if you see John Meriwether, run.

  5. Dr. Rosenrose says:

    Everyone knows you get 2 fuckups.
    -V. Niederhoffer

  6. Texashedge says:

    Proof positive that people do remember what they did in their legitimate years.

  7. Bac Koffice says:

    The real problem is that none of these guys started out in back office, which is why they dont know how to manage companies properly…its the little things that count.

    -Guy who does a lot of little things…using only one computer screen-

  8. Pee in a cup says:

    In related news, the price of Goldenseal has inflated faster than copper and silver combined over the trailing three year period.

  9. Spider-Man says:

    Everybody gets one.

  10. Shoot These Fucks says:

    Wall Street – The joke that nobody gets.

  11. I Am An Idiot says:

    ….and that was the fourth time I woke up with a dead naked mime.

    /James Cayne

  12. Jimmy "Suck my balls" Cayne says:

    Admit it, America, you love a comeback story

  13. Jimmy "Suck my balls" Cayne says:

    Admit it, America, you love a comeback story

  14. Put_Option says:

    “been working on a project that requires his undivided attention”

    Is that what were calling morning bong rips with Derek Peterson?

  15. Andre says:

    Yes, they “landed on their feet” because they spent half the interview explaining why the fall of the firm wasn’t their fault, and the schmucks at the other banks bought it.

  16. Bernie says:

    Some of them worked for me.

  17. Wevnr says:

    worked there, what a hell hole, fuckem all!

  18. Trading says:

    That’s the whole problem with the street now, instead of having these empty suits in 1 place, their all over the street now mucking up every firm. Never seen a bunch of guys who thought they were so good but are all useless. Ace was the only reason that firm worked, nobody else.

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