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Who Wants To Work With An Insufferable Prick That Plans To Make Management ‘Aware’ Of All Employees Filling Out March Madness Pools?

Today’s your lucky day! This guy actually exists.

71.5 percent of respondents to Vault’s 2011 Office Betting Survey admitted to taking part in some kind of office pool. Of those, some 65 percent said that their workplace gambling had included an NCAA bracket. That figure trumps all other forms of workplace betting, including Super Bowl boxes (58 percent) and Oscars pools (just 13 percent of respondents had gambled on any kind of awards show). Regardless of what activity they’re choosing to bet a portion of their hard-earned cash on, workers need to be careful not to spend too much of their on-the-clock time making or obsessing over their picks. While 77 percent of employees claim to spend less than half an hour of work time a day on their picks (with many spending no time at all), any perception that you’re shirking your duties in favor of gambling is likely to be viewed dimly by at least some colleagues.

“The next time I see [colleagues using work time to focus on office pools], I’m going to put an anonymous note on all the bosses desks to make them aware” warns one respondent.

Do you know this man or woman? Do you know what happened to him or her in childhood that made him feel the need to act on the behalf of management (which is probably filling out pools as well)? Do you know if the threat just includes people filling out paper brackets or if he/she will be peering over people’s shoulders and checking browser history?

Vault Office Betting Survey [Vault]

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46 Responses to “Who Wants To Work With An Insufferable Prick That Plans To Make Management ‘Aware’ Of All Employees Filling Out March Madness Pools?”

  1. The Conspiracy Theorist says:

    It’s probably the grade-changing kid from Nevada-Reno. He’s just steamed he picked “Our Lady of the Oblates” to win last year’s tournament.

  2. Guest says:

    Please make me aware of coworkers leaving shoes under their desk.

    –Rex Ryan

  3. Guest says:

    The guy behind me is running the pool. Managers and directors are in on said pool.

    Think I know who the snitch is, and suspect lack of sex with “hot” (HA!) manager is her underlying problem.

  4. Guest says:

    Greg Michaels

  5. Cactus Observer says:

    I can report that the insufferable prick is not a member of the energy trading and marketing community. While that community is full of insufferable pricks, none of them interfere with such office betting pools.

    • Texashedge says:

      Concur—anyone who’s ever had half an afternoon interrupted by “garbage bag full of dollars” can attest to this.

  6. Put_Option says:

    This was the same kid that got picked last in dodge ball, got into Piper Jaffray by the skin of his teeth but was still the worst performing in his analyst class, and generally loves the rules

  7. Dennis Gartman says:

    I knew who this prick was before the article was published.

  8. BillyPacker says:

    This person should meet me at Minetta’s. Put a sticky note on my back so I know its you and then we can discuss this, and by discuss this I mean hit you, and by hit you I mean drop kick you in the vulva.

    • AIG Vehicular Analysis Team says:

      From our ad hoc analysis of the action you proposed, we believe it would be pretty difficult to “drop kick” any thing in the confines of a Swedish made automobile.

      -AIG Quant

      • Silent Slob says:

        Like in the back of a Volkswagon?

        UBS quant

        • Quantastic says:

          You’re both retarded the. It’s located right next to the mars in the Gaussian Copula see. That is my next problem to solve before sending out my resume again the.
          -Ex-wannabe Citi analyst soon to be Harbinger Analyst

          • R Bingham says:

            I hope you are taking advantage of the DE Shaw “Laid Off Genius Outplacement Services” opportunities.

            -Ryan Bingham
            Omaha Shitcanners
            Omaha, NE

  9. PasteSpecialFormats says:

    STOP SNITCHING

    -Riley Freeman

  10. Guest says:

    Dildo with ears.

  11. Michael C. Brown says:

    Obviously Sally Krawcheck has taken a 30 minute break from writing “garden-leave” memos.

  12. Richard Cripples says:

    This really is not a big deal, the kid actually works in the athletic office at Ohio State. He sent an email telling Tressel about all the staff gambling and Tressel told him he would “get on it ASAP” so, problem solved.

  13. Richard Cripples says:

    This really is not a big deal, the kid actually works in the athletic office at Ohio State. He sent an email telling Tressel about all the staff gambling and Tressel told him he would “get on it ASAP” so, problem solved.

  14. Anonymous says:

    Kid used to work for Raj; just pissed he wouldn’t let him on the inside scoop from his friends on the NCAA selection committee

  15. Anonymous says:

    Kid used to work for Raj; just pissed he wouldn’t let him on the inside scoop from his friends on the NCAA selection committee

  16. Guest says:

    Now, you are aware that our Board of Directors has been indicted, myself included, and we’re prohibited from doing business until the investigation is completed. So, obviously we would have no use for you.

  17. Brian1284 says:

    I guess the don’t ask don’t tell policy must still ride at his office, otherwise he wouldn’t have to remain anonymous.

  18. Somnolento says:

    Matt Taibbi

  19. Guest says:

    He also had a problem with me pounding my secretary in the ass. The Dude needs to lighten up.

  20. Where was this prick when someone was putting semen in my water bottle?

  21. Ray Finkle says:

    Laces out!

  22. Ray Finkle says:

    Laces out!

  23. Mitch says:

    Don’t we have bigger things to worry about than some office pools?

    –Miyagi Prefecture

    • Dammit to Hell! says:

      No shit!!

      -US Nuclear Power Lobbyist

      • This Time Is Different says:

        If anyone is interested, I have some trading strategies that might be immediately accretive to your book during the post-earthquake situation…..

        -Nick Leeson

  24. Mitch says:

    Don’t we have bigger things to worry about than some office pools?

    –Miyagi Prefecture

  25. CoachK says:

    Duke is gonna win the NCAAs again. That’s all you need to know. Blue Devils rule on the court and on wall st for that matter.

  26. RearPlug says:

    I leave anonymous notes on my employees’ desks also hoping that someone will find the smell of Xylene as intoxicating as I do.

    -Ping

  27. Yomoma says:

    I'm curious who it is. I'm not going to do anything, I just want to talk to him

    – Meyer Lansky

  28. Asley Eskew says:

    this is cool! Fantastic luck to everyone.

  29. A2vh0h I really liked your article.Really thank you! Will read on…

  30. I tried this at operate – but once i start the WiFi-Diagnosis-Tool I’m able to see that my established up network has no signal… I tried it with WEP and with no (just to check if this causes the failure).

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