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Alleged Insider Trader Garrett Bauer Dumped Evidence In A McDonald’s, Couldn’t Sleep At Night

Earlier this morning, Garrett Bauer, a trader who mostly “worked from home” and Matthew Kluger, an M&A attorney, were accused of running a decades-long insider trading scam that involved stealing information from several law firms. Recently, the duo became suspicious that the authorities were on to them and, naturally, went about destroying evidence. Because the feds were indeed building a case against the guys and had obtained permission to record their phone calls, we’re privy to a conversation that took place on March 18, 2011, between Bauer and an individual only identified as CC-1. While Bauer doesn’t walk CC-1 through the actual steps of how he broke a disposable phone in half (as accused insider trader Donald Longueuil did, noting the use of pliers), he does make us feel like we were in the McDonald’s with him that night, particularly when he flipped out thinking some random guy buying a Big Mac was an undercover agent, and proceeded to ask the customer, “Do you know me?”

US Bauer v Kluger [PDF via Dealbook]

Related: If You’ve Ever Wondered What Donald Longueuil Might’ve Sounded Like On The Cold December Night He Told A Colleague How To Destroy Evidence Of Insider Trading, Wonder No Longer (MP3)

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147 Responses to “Alleged Insider Trader Garrett Bauer Dumped Evidence In A McDonald’s, Couldn’t Sleep At Night”

  1. A4199812 says:

    Crime doesn’t pay; and remember, only you can prevent forest fires.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Meet me at McDonalds at 9 sharp. Bring your pliers so I know its you

    – CC1

  3. Guest says:

    Waiting for the Taco Bell jokes…

  4. Guest says:

    Neurotically asking McDonald’s customers “Do you know me? You look familiar” is the NKI.

  5. Hamburglarrrr says:

    I saw him slurping a Shamrock Shake

  6. quanttrader says:

    I don’t understand why people talk about insider stuff on phone? Phone tapping is ridiculously old.

    • Anonymous says:

      How do you conduct your exchanges of insider information?

      After determining that smoke signals were impractical, my insider trading ring decided to speak in code (read: PIG LATIN).

  7. CoveredLong says:

    McDumping your McDisposable the McDay after not McDreaming the night before is the McNKI.

  8. Guest says:

    I bet he used his credit card to purchase the prepaid phone. Amateur.

  9. CheeseburgerEddie says:

    It aint easy bein cheesy

  10. CheeseburgerEddie says:

    It aint easy bein cheesy

  11. Ray Finkle says:

    Obviously these guy were not part of the “stanfield organization”

  12. Amandy White/Mark Knopfler says:

    Was it McDonalds North? By the Putty division just south of Odessa?

  13. trojan says:

    this sort of thing would never happen at Chipotle

    • Lewis Winthorpe III says:

      This sort of thing happens at Burger King all the time. It’s no big deal.

  14. Sailor25 says:

    Drop the Chalupa, and come out with your hands up!

  15. ChazGaz says:

    He sold me shares of Webistics, that fucking bum.

  16. das racist says:

    He should have done this at the Combination Pizza Hut & Taco Bell on Jamaica Ave. Then there would be reasonable doubt about his location.

  17. Anonymous says:

    I always feel like, somebody’s watching me…
    -Rockwell

  18. Rajdefense says:

    Of course the guy knew him…it was the “hamburgler”.

  19. Rajdefense says:

    Of course the guy knew him…it was the “hamburgler”.

  20. Guestalicious says:

    Longueuil tore up his disk drive with pliers. Although a SAC PM, he was not bright enough to procure a disposable cell phone for his insider trading convo’s.

  21. Guestalicious says:

    Longueuil tore up his disk drive with pliers. Although a SAC PM, he was not bright enough to procure a disposable cell phone for his insider trading convo’s.

  22. Guest says:

    If he were smart, he would have spelled out the tickers in french fry sticks and then eat the evidence. Amateur.

  23. Guest says:

    If he were smart, he would have spelled out the tickers in french fry sticks and then eat the evidence. Amateur.

  24. The Night Fox says:

    Amateurs

  25. Wallstreetandbroad says:

    My boss at Weiss Peck was known for her expertise, street smarts, and patience. One of her proudest achievements: firing Garret Bauer.

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