As Donald Trump has stated previously, were he to run for President (and he says he doesn’t want to but might have to because “the world laughs at us and they won’t be laughing at us if I’m president”), the first issued he’d tackle is “this business” with China. The Don says he’s uniquely to do so because 1) he “buys a lot of products from China” and 2) he knows how to “knows how to say things,” unlike our diplomats. Trump has said he’d put a 25 percent tax on China’s products that come into the United States and this morning on the Today show, he laid out the vicious rhetoric he’d use to make sure everyone knew to take him seriously.

“I would tell China very nicely, ‘Fellows, you’re my friend, I like you very much — and I have made a lot of money with China.’ I would say ‘We are going to put a 25% tax on all your products coming in’ and that’s going to do a number of things. Number one, as soon as they believe it will happen they will behave so nicely because it would destroy their economy.”

As for anyone who doesn’t think Donald is deadly serious about maybe running, he’d like you to know that 1) “This is very serious- I always take things seriously but never like this” and 2) You can go fuck yourself, just like Bill Cosby.

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29 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (29)

  1. Posted by Worthless Comment | April 19, 2011 at 6:52 PM

    joey joe joe jr shabadoo

  2. Posted by management say on pay | April 19, 2011 at 6:59 PM

    I’ll vote for him just as soon as his daughter does porn….otherwise I’m voting with the Owl Party.

  3. Posted by A huge Trump fan | April 19, 2011 at 7:00 PM

    I’ll know he’s serious when he outlaws Jello-O Brand Pudding…mmmmmm

    W. Cosby, MD

  4. Posted by guest | April 19, 2011 at 7:00 PM

    “Yooooooooouuuuu cannot say filth flarin flarin flarin filth in front of people. And, get away with it”

    – Eddie Murpy as Bill Cosby

  5. Posted by Nosmo King | April 19, 2011 at 7:03 PM

    Get ready for the most splendiferous pudding pop you have ever seen Trump.

  6. Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | April 19, 2011 at 7:10 PM

    These magnets, they just came from nowhere. No one knows where they came from, how they work. And it’s telling the response that happens when you say this, just bring it up. Telling. Fucking magnets, how do they work? Are they even American?

    Donald

  7. Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | April 19, 2011 at 7:13 PM

    Whaaattttttt the f***.

    LaRouche

  8. Posted by Indeed | April 19, 2011 at 7:14 PM

    NBC executives say that if Donald Trump does run for president, they will shut down “The Apprentice.” Finally, a shutdown we could be proud of.

  9. Posted by Blanus | April 19, 2011 at 7:16 PM

    Bill Cosby is Mongorian.

  10. Posted by CakePounder | April 19, 2011 at 7:29 PM

    Yeah, well I really like pound cake. Its delicious.

  11. Posted by Oswald Gruebel | April 19, 2011 at 7:37 PM

    Good point, I also like pound cake.

  12. Posted by Guest | April 19, 2011 at 7:46 PM

    R Pryor: “So Donald, these people, do they laugh when you say the things you do?”
    DT: “Well…yes they do, I think so”
    R Pryor: “Good then, tell Bill Cosby to have a Coke and a smile and shut the f#ck up!”

  13. Posted by mre | April 19, 2011 at 8:04 PM

    If Trump is becomes President then I assume Stephen Bollenbach will be Treasury Secretary.

    -Guy who remembers it was Bollenbach that cleaned up the mess that was Trump’s bankruptcy

  14. Posted by Theo Huxtable | April 19, 2011 at 8:05 PM

    I kind of like Donald Trump.

  15. Posted by Big Fat Slob | April 19, 2011 at 8:13 PM

    I’m seriously taking Trump’s seriousness serious. I’m serious.

  16. Posted by Anonymous | April 19, 2011 at 8:15 PM

    Pls adjust ratio of scotch and glue. xoxo

  17. Posted by U No Who Bitches | April 19, 2011 at 8:33 PM

    Shirley you don’t expect me to take you serious.

  18. Posted by You No Who Bitches | April 19, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    I’m singing “we freed this city from Gaddafi rule”, and I’m high as shit.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsdj9NRzqC4

  19. Posted by Anonymous | April 19, 2011 at 8:52 PM

    Perhaps with latest wife?

    - Guy who went there but isn’t quite sure where “there” is

  20. Posted by Christofurio | April 19, 2011 at 8:55 PM

    “The mental hospital. What is it?”

    “It’s a big building with doctors in it, but that’s not important now.”

  21. Posted by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad | April 19, 2011 at 8:58 PM

    “The hatred was pouring out of his eyes.” Man this guy has a thin skin.

  22. Posted by Anonymous | April 19, 2011 at 9:09 PM

    I am running for President up until I have to disclose my tax returns. Until then I am running for President.

    -Donald “I don’t belong on the Forbes List” Trump

    Ps: I really like ice cream.

  23. Posted by ExtraOrdinaryPopularDelusions | April 19, 2011 at 9:24 PM

    With a current ratio of 0:0, things can only get better.

  24. Posted by Anonymous | April 19, 2011 at 11:28 PM

    Obligatory toupee reference

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