• 15 Apr 2011 at 10:18 AM

Jamie Dimon May Be Getting A Call For Tips About How To Be A ‘Hot Piece Of Ass’ (For A Banker) In The Near Future

By Bess Levin

Now that Graydon “JPMorgan emerged from the crisis a winner because Jamie Dimon is tall, fit and nice-looking (for a banker)” Carter has been cast in Arbitrage as “the head of an investment bank trying to snap up a firm from a hedge-fund magnate, played by Richard Gere.” [NYP, earlier]

Comments (17)

  1. 1
    Posted by JR | April 15, 2011 at 2:44 PM

    Dude makes me glad to be bald.

  2. 2
    Posted by Lewis Winthorpe III | April 15, 2011 at 2:45 PM

    I still don’t understand why you needed to include the qualifier, Carter. Jamie is a hot piece of ass, period.

  3. 3
    Posted by La Flama Blanco | April 15, 2011 at 2:49 PM

    haircuts are NKI

  4. 4
    Posted by Robbin Blind | April 15, 2011 at 2:51 PM

    Holy comb-over Batman!!

  5. 5
    Posted by Guest | April 15, 2011 at 2:52 PM

    Nice hairstyle, buddy.

    – Larry Fine

  6. 6
    Posted by Blacktuna300 | April 15, 2011 at 2:56 PM

    dont hate him for the hair

  7. 7
    Posted by Put_Option | April 15, 2011 at 2:58 PM

    Yea JPM’s success had nothing to do financial activity and acquiring Bear at a significant discount gaining its prime brokerage desk and 383 Madison office. I’m sure all the JPM employees need directions wiping their ass let along generating Alpha. He’s so right that the aesthetic qualities of a man are key net income drivers.

  8. 8
    Posted by Put_Option | April 15, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    “to do with” and “let alone”

  9. 9
    Posted by Chompers | April 15, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    I love Flock of Seagulls!

  10. 10
    Posted by Propane Trader | April 15, 2011 at 3:03 PM

    Dude looks like he’s been doing u-turns under a wool blanket.

  11. 11
    Posted by Moneychangeseverything | April 15, 2011 at 3:04 PM

    Graydon is just an average American… With extraordinary hair.

  12. 12
    Posted by Guest | April 15, 2011 at 3:13 PM

    How does one drive a blanket?
    -AIG Cotton Quant

  13. 13
    Posted by Anonymous | April 15, 2011 at 3:20 PM

    Is there no supposed to be a “the” in front of NKI? I’ve become a little confused the past couple of days.

  14. 14
    Posted by Greecian Urnings | April 15, 2011 at 3:36 PM

    Outstanding hair! Check mine…..
    http://www.badassdigest.com/2011/02/03/an-ode-to-giorgio-tsoukalos

  15. 15
    Posted by Hollywood Insider | April 15, 2011 at 3:38 PM

    Vern Troyer is slated to play the part of the gerbil inside Gere’s rectum.

  16. 16
    Posted by Brasky | April 15, 2011 at 4:06 PM

    I chalk it up to Jamie’s management style – Have I ever mentioned the time Dimon forced me to wear a woman’s bikini? Well anyway, Dimon tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman’s bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn’t tripled.

  17. 17
    Posted by Lewis Winthorpe III | April 15, 2011 at 7:39 PM

    He uses the Shroud of Turin as a golf towel.

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