News

Donald Trump Will Not Run For President

The Don has announced the lure of the White House is not great enough to make him give up his biggest passion just yet (but watch out 2016).

After considerable deliberation and reflection, I have decided not to pursue the office of the Presidency. This decision does not come easily or without regret; especially when my potential candidacy continues to be validated by ranking at the top of the Republican contenders in polls across the country. I maintain the strong conviction that if I were to run, I would be able to win the primary and ultimately, the general election. I have spent the past several months unofficially campaigning and recognize that running for public office cannot be done half heartedly. Ultimately, however, business is my greatest passion and I am not ready to leave the private sector.

I want to personally thank the millions of Americans who have joined the various Trump grassroots movements and written me letters and e-mails encouraging me to run. My gratitude for your faith and trust in me could never be expressed properly in words. So, I make you this promise: that I will continue to voice my opinions loudly and help to shape our politician’s thoughts. My ability to bring important economic and foreign policy issues to the forefront of the national dialogue is perhaps my greatest asset and one of the most valuable services I can provide to this country. I will continue to push our President and the country’s policy makers to address the dire challenges arising from our unsustainable debt structure and increasing lack of global competitiveness. Issues, including getting tough on China and other countries that are methodically and systematically taking advantage of the United States, were seldom mentioned before I brought them to the forefront of the country’s conversation. They are now being debated vigorously. I will also continue to push for job creation, an initiative that should be this country’s top priority and something that I know a lot about. I will not shy away from expressing the opinions that so many of you share yet don’t have a medium through which to articulate.

I look forward to supporting the candidate who is the most qualified to help us tackle our country’s most important issues and am hopeful that, when this person emerges, he or she will have the courage to take on the challenges of the Office and be the agent of change that this country so desperately needs

Thank you and God Bless America!

Donald J. Trump

So many emotions, so many feelings, so many unanswered questions come to mind at this time. Chief among them being:

1) Who will Gary Busey throw his support to now, after his endorsement (and acronym/slogan/Buseyism: T(aking) R(edirection), U(nderstanding) M(assive) P(ower)) has been wasted?

2) WHO WILL TELL THE CHINESE, “Listen you motherfuckers, we’re going to tax you 25 percent“?!

Trump Not Running for President: ‘Decision Does Not Come Easily Or Without Regret’ [ABC]

35 comments
(hidden for your protection)
Show all comments

35 Responses to “Donald Trump Will Not Run For President”

  1. Guest says:

    The bad news: Now some other whack job has a chance. 

  2. VP says:

    Donald’s another Bin Laden victim. Except he ain’t dead.

  3. Guest says:

    Fuck.

    ~J.Stewart

  4. Guest says:

    Go Ron Paul 

    • Counterparty says:

      Sure, go Ron Paul – the only potential candidate who’s ultimately more absurd than Donald, if only by just a little.

      If these fuckers are the best the GOP can put forth, I’d hope Hilary makes a primary run. She’d get many GOP voters to tag along.

  5. L. Tilton says:

     I’ll tell the Chinese motherfuckers that we’re going to tax them 25%. They’ve never seen cleavage like this before. 

  6. Guest says:

    Goodbye my bloated, golden pelted friend your bloviations will be dearly missed on DB. 
    Thanks for the memories.

  7. Raja says:

     I can’t vote in prison anyway.

  8. Roll over Combover says:

    What a
    schmuck. He couldn’t take the hits after the Correspondents’ Dinner and now
    he’s crawling back to his dubious businesses. I can’t wait until
    Trump’s house of cards collapses and he’s exposed as a charlatan.

  9. Duh says:

    “I easily would have won, that’s why I’m quitting.”  – The Donald

    “Shit, that is brilliant logic!” – AIG FP Quant

  10. Homosaurus says:

     That man certainly knows his meat.

  11. early hominid says:

     A mere comic shell of  the great man he used to be – *snif*-  now reduced to telling steaks they’ve been fired, even though the grillmarks’ mute eloquence say it better.  Godspeed, great orange orangutan, godspeed. 

  12. Guest says:

    Herman Cain! 

  13. TwatHammer says:

    Now crawl back into your spiderhole and die motherfucker.

  14. Guest says:

    Will he be welcomed at the Table of Dimon to feast now? 

  15. Campaign Manager says:

     But in a terrible twist of irony, the Whitehouse is still for sale. 

  16. Guest2 says:

    He has the same smile as Muffy.  Damn, I miss her… 

  17. Anonymous says:

    Funny thing is, I’m sure I would have won the primary and ultimately the general election as well.  However, in the spirit of competitiveness, I have decided not to run and allow others the chance for a more competitive election. 

  18. Miss Teen South Carolina says:

    I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps, and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children. like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children.

  19. Guest says:

    givin’ the gunner to a platter of beef never gets old.second best gunner (next to barcar gunner, ofc)

  20. Henry parsons says:

    Maybe Donald realized that when the press dug into his finances they’d expose the fact that through his extraordinary business acumen he turned the $30+ million his father left him into a fortune credibly estimated at $150-$200 million. In only 40 years…

  21. Great.  Now what do I do with the http://www.trumpforfuckingpresident.com domain?  I really thought I was going to be able to sell 25,000 t-shirts this weekend.   
     

  22. Mitt!!! says:

    my plan to lose to Obama by 15 percentage points is all falling into place

  23. Hedgehog says:

    OMG!! America has so much to lose if the Donald is not President!!!! LOL!!! Wonder if the hair will still be around in 2016……