“This is really asking for a second opinion.”
How A Charlotte Stripper Got Credit Suisse To Admit To Mortgage Fraud And That “Someone Should Go To Jail For This” [Zero Hedge via BI]
Related: SEC Subpoenas Credit Suisse Over Mortgages, MBIA Says [Bloomberg]





Hope the IRS doesn’t read DB.
and thus Patriarch Partners was born unto this world
is Amber Swift the stripper? I think I know her work.
(* All figures quoted in Bess Bux.)
To: Ronald Szukala
From: Eddie Othman
Subject: Second Opinion
Ron,
Per your request, I spent the last week at the club assessing our client’s income potential. Can you please expedite my expense report as I put everything on my Amex and can’t cover the bill I just received.
Regards
Eddie
PS – I believe she can cover the nut.
they can’t read
The Bess Bux currency is exclusive to Beamer’s.
$550/night, 5 nights a week, as a stripper in NC? Challenge!
Even if she gives EPIC bj’s that’s still unrealistic.
Imagine the size of the thong you would need to handle $1m stuffed down it.
From: “Tony Noviello”
To: “Eric Lapin”
Eric:
She’s telling me that she’s on a $10,000/month cash money retainer by a certain NC bank senior executive, she refers to him by “Kenny” though I looked and there is no executive of a real bank by this name in NC. But he’s been money good for a couple of years now, always asks about her kids, and she doesn’t even have to swallow.
Please resubmit.
Thx,
Tony
that or 27.5 lapdances, not counting what they have to pay the house.
You know you’ve made it when your office is located on T Rex Avenue.
Only 93.75 minutes of work (house is $200)
or 19.5% “utilization rate” (8 Hour shift)
–UBS Commodities Analyst
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Soo, anyhoo, it’s Friday, and I’m not wearing pants. Not now, not never.
Dresses.
I’ll send you one.
Bang a gong, get it on.
I don’t think “withholding” was an issue here………
You mean you’ll borrow one from your man?
WHY CAN’T IT READ??
-Steve Jobs
Please be specific about the type of jail somoene needs to go to for this.
–MT
Is that reported income? How do you approve a loan to someone whose income is all cash? No way is she reporting it all.
Stop. Stop with your logic and reasoning. It’s free-for-all friday.
Doesn’t this email chain reflect that they’re debating whether they should have made the loan, not whether to make it? It suggests she’s 2 months overdue. They’re now fighting over the putback, because they already made the loan. So I think it’s worse than the headline suggests.
Bess, any relation to the obligor?
Agreed but see LW III’s comment above.
- Guy who learned his lesson
You don’t see this kind of stuff at UBS.
Should have demanded 10,000 prepaid tickets for lap dances as collateral, instead of some shitty piece of real estate. With proper loan structuring, we wouldn’t be having this problem now.
A real banker
Credit Suisse is the best you can work for, except BlackRock. Stop blaming bankers, journalists are fools, didn´t make the way of us financials. This behaviour must be stopped.
That’s why its a no income loan you pansy. where have you been the past 5 years?
That’s why its a no income loan you pansy. where have you been the past 5 years?
Please never post again.
They should have just verified her assets
Leslie Scism
I wonder if her income will remain at those levels for the next 3 decades? Hrm, things to think about between rounds of Angry Birds on the shitter…
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Thats Cicero ave in Chicago IL, not Cicero IL
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