Jamie Dimon Is Sorry Citigroup Can’t Take A Joke

“You should go work for a real bank,” Mr. Dimon taunted a Citigroup banker at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, in January, interrupting while the banker was schmoozing clients. Mr. Dimon says he made the comment in jest and is “sorry.” The incident inflamed Citigroup executives, already peeved by what they saw as attempts to poach Citigroup clients by highlighting the bank’s turmoil, said people familiar with the matter. [WSJ]

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52 Responses to “Jamie Dimon Is Sorry Citigroup Can’t Take A Joke”

  1. Confucius says:

    He went on to explain that the decade he spent building Citigroup into an unholy leviathan was all just the setup to that joke, and it was totally worth it

    • DDDD says:

      Meet me at SL East this weekend and I’ll throw a few bottles of Dom at your face. I’ll be the the guy with the $180k tab, you’ll know who.

    • JBEV says:

      Sandy Weil could not be reached for comment

      -cnbc reporter

    • Guest says:

      I think shareholders were just happy that Sandy had the deep bench of Sir Deryck, Bobby Rubin, Jessica “no the B stands for Bibliowicz” and Chuck “Tiny Dancer” Prince to catapult C to greater glory and world dominance once they got that slacker JD out of the way.

      Signed, Dance Floor Referee at Greenbrier

  2. lax BRO says:

    “I’m Sorry I’m not Sorry, I’m a Cocksman”


  3. Anonymous says:

    Why, are you guys hiring?  I’m tired of picking up Vikram’s dhotis at the cleaners…

    – Shamed banker “that never sleeps”

    • Guest says:

      I guess that would be funny if VP ever wore anything that wasn’t a suit?

      • Anonymous says:

        Examining motives:  Had it been Axel Weber would I have said lederhosen? 

        Yep…I’m good.

      • Guest says:

        looks like someone is offed that they weren’t invited to VP’s weekend bhangera parties, shit is gonna be epic!

      • Ssummerill says:

        JD was one of the most liked by those that worked for him, such as myself for over 43 yrs with Citi before retiring last year.  He was awesome, good VP, cared for his people, and watched out for his investor’s.  If possible he would be one that could buy Main One Financial, and grow the company.  I am not upset with his statement, it does not change the fact that Citi pulled thru and we are on our way to becoming again #1 in the Financial Industry.  JD would be a great asset, at one time we all thought he rather that the Prince would be the next CEO of Citi. I not only worked for him but have watched what he has accomplished with Chase, and still admire him and the caring he has for his fellow men and woman. Both Citi, Chase, and the other three players will do will to help all of us enjoy a better life. Thanks to JD, Vick, and others that help make this happen. Stan the money man::

  4. markstainmaker says:

    pompous  and  snarky  are  words  that  describe……………

  5. Last Man Standing says:

    screw Citi, they had JD eating out of their hands till they tossed him out with the trash to make extra space for jessica b.

  6. Guy who gets Irony says:

    Thats exactly what the proud people of “J.P. Morgan” used to say before they became employees of “J.P.Morgan Chase”

  7. Jamie D. says:

    I’m sorry I’m not the most boring person ever!  Okay?  I’m sorry I’m not poor!  I’m sorry I don’t have a fat ass!  I’m sorry I’m not… Hey!  Where you going?

  8. In touch with my sexuality says:

    Dimon looks so dreamy here. No homo.

  9. WallStreetFatCat says:

    Sounds like Jamie may have “accidentally” slipped up like Erin…

  10. guest says:

    Like Citi doesn’t say that to UBS bankers

  11. guest says:

    Proper response would be “Goldman isn’t hiring”

  12. Oooh Yeah says:

    What a scumbag snake in the grass.

    true story/no homo

  13. JPed says:

    Mr Dimon went on to say “aren’t you tired of getting bent over in the Vikram Yoga studio and never sleeping?” 

  14. Pete B. & Wes E. says:

    Our balance sheet is just fine, thank you.

  15. Anonymous says:

    This reminds me of Mr. T in Rocky III when he is taunting Adrienne to get with a real man.

  16. PasteSpecialFormats says:

    Summer Farm Hand duties include:

    -Manual stimulation of bull prior to mating
    -Daily acquisition of goat’s milk
    -Collection and distribution of ‘fertilizer’

  17. Ken Lewis says:

    I don’t get it?

  18. Guest says:

    Wait, is JD the UBS sucks guy?

  19. Let’s be clear – there are only two Bulge Bracket Firms to be a banker for; JP-Monay and GoldmanStacks. All others are for the bitches. I’ve never seen a CreditPuisse or ShittyBankers throwing stacks of rolled up 20’s at the cocktail waitress’s head at Marquee.

    – Guy who wants to be clear that although he changes the names of banks he will still alligator slap the shit out of a guy who says “bankster”.

    • Guest says:

      Who still goes to Marquee?  I thought after the HBS Case Study it became officially uncool.  I guess not to FXers…..

    • Guestalicious says:

      terrible comment. i hate not having a don’t like button.

    • Guest says:

      Funny because you seem like exactly the kind of self-loathing hypocritical douche who would use the term bankster. 

    • Guest says:

      Bank-banksta luvv

  20. Fuld says:

    Fucking right Jamie. I said the same thing to Blankfein

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