As you may have heard, a whole bunch of banks have plans to eliminate jobs in the coming months. While it may be little sympathy to those who’ve already lost their jobs (cuts have already begun at Goldman Sachs, UBS, Credit Suisse and Morgan Stanley), those who were spared or will potentially be spared in upcoming rounds can perhaps appreciate the fact that it could well be worse if the firms performing the bloodletting weren’t also cracking down on expenses, thereby saving an employee or two from getting the boot. If you don’t think the belt-tightening is having a serious impact on their lives, think again. For many, it’s like Greece out there.

Morgan Stanley has begun spelling out the cost of market data services, BlackBerry use, travel and other running expenses to employees, encouraging them to cut back…The austerity measures seem to be having an effect on some traders, who have become more cautious in recent months. “It’s tense — everyone is constantly looking over their shoulder,” said one former fixed income trader at a large Wall Street firm who recently moved into a risk-management role. “I’m not expensing lunch, and I’m taking the subway home.”

One firm’s austerity measures, of course, are other firm’s perks. You don’t even want to know the things a UBS employee would let you do to his body for a $10 subway pass. An unlimited monthly? Would haunt even the most debased mind’s dreams (two HJ’s to be redeemed while watching episodes of Hoarders for an express bus plus seven day, if you want the actual figures).

Wall Street Targets Pay As Trading Revenues Fizzle [Reuters]

Comments (19)

  1. Posted by Guy who is impressed | July 11, 2011 at 4:43 PM

    Man vs Wild! This dude is roughing it for the greater good
    It’s tense, I’m not expensing lunch, and I’m taking the subway home

  2. Posted by Hm | July 11, 2011 at 4:48 PM

    Hm. Is that the body of a man or woman?

    - Inquisitive commenter

  3. Posted by Put_Option | July 11, 2011 at 4:50 PM

    This question is a layup. Less hookers and blow. Should increase margins by at least 90-100% on an annualized basis. 

    - Mark Lowe

    Trying suing me now! Double Jeopardy mutha fuckas!

  4. Posted by Anonymous | July 11, 2011 at 4:56 PM

    Do we need to have a talk?

    -Bird & Bee, Uncomfortable Discussion Consultants

  5. Posted by Shuckey Duckey | July 11, 2011 at 4:57 PM

    I even started to drink me own piss for lunch.

    / Bear Grylls Quant

  6. Posted by CostReductor | July 11, 2011 at 5:04 PM

    What’s next, double sided copies and no color printing? Clowns should know by now that these measures never, ever work and are usually a precursor to another round. 

  7. Posted by trojan | July 11, 2011 at 5:10 PM

    that’s how you get pinkeye

  8. Posted by the truth | July 11, 2011 at 5:10 PM

    best tag ever?  

  9. Posted by Casey Anthony | July 11, 2011 at 5:15 PM

    Are they willing to sacrifice their first born to maintain the lifestyle?

  10. Posted by Dr. | July 11, 2011 at 5:29 PM

    That dancer might want to get those moles looked at, unless health coverage is part of the cutbacks.

  11. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2011 at 5:30 PM

    THATS THE TRUFF TRUFF!

  12. Posted by the truth | July 11, 2011 at 6:04 PM

    Was the tag to risque for DB?  It’s gone but not forgotten:

    “two HJ’s and a handie-via-mouth for an express bus plus
    seven day if you want the actual figures”

     

  13. Posted by Anonymous | July 11, 2011 at 6:06 PM

    Please–it was swapped for “pictured: a UBS MD dancing for his dinner” and added to the actual post. (And I decided an HJ during Hoarders was sicker than the original.)

  14. Posted by Lewis Winthorpe III | July 11, 2011 at 7:09 PM

    That’s a good question… if you are only accustomed to seeing “men” aged 15 and below.

  15. Posted by I'm a Dude | July 11, 2011 at 9:52 PM

    this new fellow Matt is at DB only one day and hes already getting Bess to pose for pics for the tags. bravo man.

  16. Posted by Anonymous | July 11, 2011 at 10:00 PM

    I have to say it….UBS sucks!

  17. Posted by Put_Option | July 11, 2011 at 10:01 PM

    You didn’t, but thank you for stating the obvious 

  18. Posted by Tanker2Banker | July 11, 2011 at 10:40 PM

    Ah, the austerity memos. I remember one about reusing paper clips and how much money the firm would save. Immediately started looking for new employment. Swell of them to foreshadow cuts in such a non-threatening way.

  19. Posted by Guest | July 12, 2011 at 2:23 PM

    Well done.

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