Lenny Dykstra’s Cleaning Staff Didn’t Know Their Gigs Required Giving The Boss Massages, Getting A Glimpse At His Most Valuable Player

Back in January, Lenny Dykstra was accused of sexually harassing his housekeeper, who claimed that LD forced her to “give him oral sex on Saturdays.” At the time, Dykstra scoffed at the allegations, telling a reporter that he was the victim of extortion and “If she was assaulted on Saturdays, I’m a ballerina dancer on Sundays.” Charges were never filed (prosecutors cited a lack of evidence), which Nails apparently took as a sign that this kind of interaction with your cleaning lady is not in fact frowned upon and continued spending his weekends dancing Swan Lake on Sundays after dropping trou in various maids’ faces on Saturdays.

Lenny Dykstra has been charged with indecent exposure for allegedly exposing himself to women responding to his ads on Craigslist. The newest charges stem from multiple reported incidents over three years, the attorney’s office said. There was one report from 2009, three in 2010 and reports from February and April of this year. In each incident, the release said, Dykstra allegedly placed an ad on Craigslist requesting personal assistant or housekeeping services. The release said that when the women met Dykstra, he allegedly informed the women the job required them to give a massage, and allegedly exposed himself to them. According to a release from the Los Angeles City Attorney’s office, Dykstra was charged with two counts and could face up to six months in jail and a $1,000 fine for each count.

If anyone’s got some cash on hand, he’s good for it.

Dykstra Charged With Indecent Exposure [LATimes]

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43 Responses to “Lenny Dykstra’s Cleaning Staff Didn’t Know Their Gigs Required Giving The Boss Massages, Getting A Glimpse At His Most Valuable Player”

  1. VonSloneker says:

    Call in sick on Saturdays…duh

  2. dsk says:


    Call me bro


  3. Guest says:

    I don't know what craigslist is, but fair warning if Lenny asks you to grab a pack of Redman and meet him in the trainer's room.

    – 1989 Mets locker room attendant

  4. Shawn says:

    His newsletter buyers took it in the arse every day, so I'm not quite sure what the big deal is here.

  5. Financial_Servicer says:

    '93 Phillies – it's been a long ride to the bottom but I don't think we're there yet.

  6. Nailz6 says:

    That's baller.

    – UBS Analyst

  7. Backdoor_Bess says:

    telling overweight hispanic non-english speaking maids to 'clean your undercarriage' is the NKI

  8. guest says:

    I hear Arnold's last maid is looking for a new gig but, it will have to pay well seeing as now she is getting some income from her ex boss but, she is more than willing to catch a few new "tadpoles" from any rich donor.

  9. Guest says:


    We may have something for you, but I can't take Twizzler IOUs. Call if interested.

    -The Crazy Cleaners Czech guy

  10. Bob Morris says:

    Just when you think he can't be more of a dirt-bag…

  11. Peter says:

    Is that Lenny’s O-face?

  12. Guest says:

    How do you think he got the nickname "nails"?

    Think verb, not noun.

  13. Wimpy says:

    "I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a BJ today…"

  14. Louis Winthorpe III says:

    Bess, LD's been in the news enough that we might want to consider including his middle name going forward– Leonard Kyle Dykstra. Always with the three names.

  15. JJC says:

    He's still one of the great ones. – JJC

  16. The Lyrical Gangsta says:

    Wait…this is illegal?

    – Tiger Woods

  17. Models Milf says:

    What category do I – I mean – did he use on Cragslist for the posting?

  18. 25th Hour Trader says:

    In this economy, we need to stop criticizing people who create jobs like Mr. Dykstra.

    -Mr. Dykstra's attorney who received a briefcase full of twizzlers for a retainer along with a handwritten note that merely reads "I'll get ya the rest when I'm out, bro".

  19. Curious Georeg says:

    On a related matter, is it prostitution if the check doesn't clear?

  20. House of Pain says:

    I wonder what Cramer regrets more: recommending BSC before the shit hit the fan or endorsing Nails before his shit hit the floor?

  21. GMain says:

    Should change his name to Dickstra…

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