Archive for August 2011

Standard & Poor’s has had a few hiccups recently, locking themselves into pointlessly downgrading U.S. Treasuries, pissing off Jean-Claude Trichet, and blowing up the CMBS market revival because they realized too late that they’d forgotten to carry a two.

But Jana Partners and Ontario Teachers’ think of these things not as problems but as opportunities for growth. Or, at least, they seem to think that future growth is going to come less from teaching children how to read and do math, and more from rating sovereign bonds issued by children who can’t read or do math.
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Like her lunging brother from another mother, she, too, spent the morning attempting to “illuminate a dark cranny in the financial world.” [Gothamist, earlier]

Rep. Emmanuel Cleaver [Twitter]

Also: @Satan Sandwich

White collar criminals have had a rough couple of weeks, with judges ignoring important facts like Danielle Chiesi’s insider trading being caused by a deep need to stop her boss from “belittling her understanding of the financial numbers” and Donald Longueuil’s only insider trading on the job, never in his personal life. But there’s finally some good news today, as a federal appeals court reversed five convictions for a reinsurance fraud at AIG. Unlike in Chiesi’s and Longueuil’s cases, the court today looked at the bigger picture and understood that you can’t blame a few small-time book-cookers for all of the terrible things at AIG.

Also, no one connected with AIG in any way is going to jail any time soon.
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Last month UBS said it would be introducing a dress code that would require employees to wear full suits on the job, in order to “re-establish credibility and a sense of professionalism.” The staff was less than enthused about the new rule but today brings the good news that those who spent hours practicing the bank’s patented step-by-step guide re learning how to tie a tie can simply chalk it up to a life skill they now posses but need not use daily. Continue reading »

Last month, the California housing market got a huge boost when the younger daughter of Formula 1 boss Bernie Ecclestone decided to buy Candy Spelling’s 57,000 square foot house. At the time we noted that despite what the haters had to say (that this was “a gift from daddy to his spoiled little girl”), Petra clearly purchased the spread not simply because it’d be a nice vacation house when she visits the states (her primary residence is a a six-story house in London’s Chelsea neighborhood purchased for £56 million) but as a shrewd business decision that would be a boon not only to California but her own portfolio. Over the weekend, Ecclestone confirmed just that, telling an interviewer “It was a great investment. It’s prime real estate and I got a really good deal.” Continue reading »

“For the month of July, Greenlight Capital Offshore returned 1.1% (net of all fees and expenses).”

When Donald Trump chose not to run for President, the American people lost a lot. They lost the opportunity to hear the Don tell China, “Listen you motherfuckers, we’re going to tax you at 25 percent.” They lost the opportunity to watch a presidential candidate tell Bill Cosby to blow him. And most of all, the lost the opportunity to behold as bankruptcy specialist Donald Trump used his expertise to lead us out of the economic darkness and into the light. Though he remained silent on the debt talks for far too long, last week Trump finally weighed in on the debate (“The Republicans should tap it along, make it go longer, until the next election so Obama can’t win”) and today on Squawk Box, he continued. Continue reading »

  • 01 Aug 2011 at 8:21 AM

Opening Bell: 08.01.11

Obama, Congress Reach Debt Deal (WSJ)
The Senate and House are expected to vote on the deal Monday, so the agreement still needs the support of many House Republicans, who have proven a restless, independent group in recent days. But if it passes both chambers, it culminates an extraordinary display of political and economic brinksmanship, coming just days before the government could have been unable to fully pay its bills. The deal would raise the debt ceiling by $2.4 trillion in two stages, and provide initially for $917 billion in spending cuts over 10 years. A special committee of lawmakers would be charged with finding another $1.5 trillion in deficit reduction, which could come through a tax overhaul and changes to safety-net programs. If the committee doesn’t find at least $1.2 trillion in savings, or Congress doesn’t adopt its proposals, a pre-set array of spending cuts would kick in, including cuts in military spending and Medicare payments to health-care providers.

‘Band Aid’ Deal May Pressure S&P to Slash US Rating (Reuters)
The deal “is certainly not a game-changing breakthrough, and will keep the possibility of a near-term rating downgrade alive; it represents, in our view, just a band-aid approach on the way to more sustainable public finances,” said Julian Callow, the chief European economist at Barclays Capital in a research note on Monday.

HSBC Posts Surprise Profit Rise; Cuts 30,000 Jobs (Reuters)
“There will be further job cuts,” Chief Executive Stuart Gulliver told reporters on a conference call. “There will be something like 25,000 roles eliminated between now and the end of 2013.” The cuts equate to roughly 10 percent of HSBC’s total workforce. They come on top of any reductions in overall headcount that will result from a program of disposals that also forms part of a plan to focus on HSBC’s Asian operations.

Hedge Fund Cashes In $850 Million Goldman Stake (NYP)
Lansdowne Partners, a London-based hedge fund that is said to be the largest in Europe, has cashed in its entire $850 million stake in the New York bank giant. Lansdowne sold its shares in Goldman — whose results lately have hit a rough patch under wisecracking CEO Lloyd Blankfein — because of rising concerns about stiffening US regulations that are putting a crimp in its profits, according to the Sunday Telegraph, citing unnamed sources close to the situation.

Ex-SAC Manager Sentenced In Expert Network Probe (WSJ)
A former hedge-fund manager at SAC Capital Advisors was sentenced to 2½ years in prison Friday after he pleaded guilty in April to insider-trading charges. Donald Longueuil, 35 years old, was charged as part of an investigation into the ties between so-called expert-network firms, which match company insiders with hedge-fund managers and other investors for a fee. “I continue to accept full responsibility and will forever be remorseful for those actions,” Mr. Longueuil said before sentencing. “I have one life to live and forever tainted it. “I made mistakes, I crossed the line, I broke the law,” he told the court. After the judge left the bench, Mr. Longueuil visibly sobbed in the courtroom.

Report: Man Finds Brick Of Unknown Substance, Snorts It, Dies (WPBF)
Thomas Swindal, 53, was offshore on Marathon when he and his brother Kenneth discovered a brick of an unknown substance, possibly cocaine, floating in the water. They ended up tossing the package into a bait well until a short time later, when Kenneth said he turned around and saw his brother snorting some of the substance. Kenneth told investigators that about 90 minutes later, Thomas began running around the boat, throwing things into the water, including a cell phone and a VHF radio. Thomas also picked up knives, pliers and a gaff and removed the cowling from the engine, which fell overboard and sank, leaving the brothers stranded. To avoid further dangers, Kenneth said he tossed all remaining sharp objects into the water, as well as the package of the mysterious substance. Continue reading »