Earlier today on CBNC, Jim Cramer pitched an idea that he thinks could end Bank of America’s problems: beg a billionaire to vouch for you. Just like Goldman Sachs got Warren Buffett and Citi has Prince Alwaleed bin Talal, Bank of America needs someone to get out there and say to the markets, “It’s okay, these guys are cool.” Personally, Cramer likes the idea of Carlos Slim, telling his colleagues “You know we forget he’s the world’s richest man…if the guy wants to make a statement that says America is the place to invest, hey, Bank of America…would that not be an interesting match?” Having said that, Slim may not be into the idea and backups should be considered. The following represents a very rough short list of people, whether they be billionaires or individuals who simply inspire confidence either through charm or fear with whom we think Brian Moynihan should consider taking a lunch.
* Bruce Wayne
* John Paulson
* The Formula 1 racing heiress who bought Candy Spelling’s house
* George Soros
* Lynn Tilton
* Warren Buffett (no one said anything to him about not being allowed to have a piece on the side)
* Justin Bieber
* The Karate Kid
* Mark Wahlberg
* Jame Gumb (“It buys BAC or it gets the hose again. Yes, it will, Precious, won’t it?”)
* Ken Lewis
If you’ve got better ideas for the Go To Bat For BAC campaign, please nominate them at this time.