From time to time around these parts, when things get really, really bad, we like to take a few moments to get a little perspective. Yes, you could be getting your face ripped off for the 7th day straight. Yes, your boss could be forcing you, literally, to stay in a job you hate. Yes, you could be ruing the day you tempted fate by ejaculating for a second time into your colleague’s water bottle after the first emission went unnoticed. But you’re not Gavin DeGraw and for that you should be thankful.

Pop singer Gavin DeGraw was viciously beaten by a pack of thugs in the East Village early yesterday — and then hit by a taxi as he stumbled off, police sources said. The 34-year-old performer — who has spent the summer opening for star rock bands Maroon 5 and Train — had been drinking and just left a group of pals when he was attacked by the marauding goons sometime between 3:50 and 4:20 a.m. at Sixth Street and First Avenue, the sources said. His nose was broken and he suffered cuts to his face, they said. The creeps then fled, and the dazed singer, whose hit song “Chariot” went platinum, kept walking, sources said. He wound up at 19th Street and First Avenue, where he was struck by a taxi.

Think about that the next time you feel like this vol is ripping your face off, breaking your nose and throwing you into a cab.

East Village Thugs Beat Up Pop Star [NYP]
Gavin DeGraw suffers concussion in New York assault [Reuters]

Comments (27)

  1. Posted by Chuck D | August 9, 2011 at 4:21 PM

    "I…..don't wanna be….anything….other than….fully fucking armed to the teeth from now on"

    Gavin D.

  2. Posted by PermaGuestII | August 9, 2011 at 4:26 PM

    Roaming mobs attacking hipsters = a good start.

  3. Posted by one | August 9, 2011 at 4:27 PM

    The East Village is the new London.

  4. Posted by geoffgeoffgeoff | August 9, 2011 at 4:30 PM

    Bank of Amerillwide needs to merge with Gavin DeGraw in order to survive.

    -Not Dick Bové, But Definitely Suspect Of His Work

  5. Posted by Backdoor_Bess | August 9, 2011 at 4:32 PM

    and his music still sucks.

  6. Posted by Guest | August 9, 2011 at 4:32 PM

    Long live Gavin DeGraw. He will be surely missed.

    - Dr. who will be sure to 'treat' him after the taxi incident

  7. Posted by Anti Hipster | August 9, 2011 at 4:41 PM

    Deserved everything he got just for that hat alone.

  8. Posted by Dr_Rosenrose | August 9, 2011 at 4:43 PM

    Opening for Maroon 5 is something we should all be incredibly thankful we won't have to endure.

  9. Posted by Anal_ist | August 9, 2011 at 4:49 PM

    That is blindly insensitive, politically incorrect and "too soon." I like the cut of your jib, sir. We need a few more like you around here.

  10. Posted by VonSloneker | August 9, 2011 at 4:52 PM

    Man, Willie Wonka looks like hell…

    -C. Bucket

  11. Posted by Not Matt | August 9, 2011 at 4:57 PM

    bzzzzzup!
    let x = Hit song
    y = taxi
    s = Chariot.mp3
    b = getting hit by taxi

    (x*s) + (y*b)

    ziiiirrrrp! ding!

    Report: Irony is funny

    initiate laughter.mp3

  12. Posted by Matt Taibbi | August 9, 2011 at 4:57 PM

    Sorry dude I thought you were Andrew Ross Sorkin

  13. Posted by VonSloneker | August 9, 2011 at 5:21 PM

    Kinda like that summer at band camp for you, huh Doc..

    :)

  14. Posted by RichardCripples | August 9, 2011 at 5:32 PM

    On the plus side his skinny jeans now look completely "vintage"

  15. Posted by Guestness | August 9, 2011 at 5:38 PM

    I would've had my ass parked at Taco Bell

  16. Posted by Muzak Holdings, LP | August 9, 2011 at 5:41 PM

    On behalf of Adam Levine, Pat Monahan, the members of Maroon5 and Train; we would like to state that we are terribly disturbed by these events and our thoughts and prayers are with Gavin. In a show of solidarity, you will hear their music nonstop in every elevator you enter over the next week. We believe it will have a calming effect on those that would commit these violent acts.

  17. Posted by SNL | August 9, 2011 at 5:43 PM

    1976 called and wants John Paulson's look back….

  18. Posted by NAS Keflavik boi | August 9, 2011 at 5:54 PM

    "East Village Thug" = underweight trustafarian that shares a skanky multi-tatted ho with three of his friends

  19. Posted by Guest | August 9, 2011 at 5:54 PM

    not matt = kill yourself

  20. Posted by Nouveau Richie | August 9, 2011 at 6:26 PM

    To guest:

    FYI – you're not actually telling him to kill himself, you're telling him that the command "Not Matt" is equivalent to the command "Kill Yourself."

    If now, after establishing the object "not matt," you told not matt to go not matt, THEN he would go kill himself.

    (Also, before you say it, I'm not going to go not matt.)

  21. Posted by Guest | August 9, 2011 at 6:27 PM

    my apologies. i just want the guy to kill himself.

  22. Posted by Guest | August 9, 2011 at 7:03 PM

    correction – i just want matt to kill himself

  23. Posted by DingALing | August 9, 2011 at 10:04 PM

    Rock Star hippie getting beat while IBD analyst gets ride home in a town car = the start of something great. It might even foreshadow the 2012 election.

  24. Posted by Austinite | August 10, 2011 at 9:26 AM

    Goodness people. This guy could not be a hipster A) that photo is too polished B) no real hipster would ever have a record go platinum- too mainstream C) fedoras are no longer ironic when worn by dudes any longer so no longer worn by hipsters.

  25. Posted by NowOnePerson | August 10, 2011 at 9:58 AM

    Can we get Matt to not matt Not Matt?

  26. Posted by Alpha_Bets | August 10, 2011 at 11:26 AM

    "Oh chariot your golden waves
    Are walking down upon this face"

    He's talking about the taxi, right?

    -Lyrics Googler

  27. Posted by Peter Baxter | August 29, 2011 at 6:50 AM

    The Merchants of Menace
    The quality of mercy is not strained.
    It drops as the gentle rain from heaven
    upon the place beneath. It is twice blest:
    It blesses him that gives and him that takes.
    The mightiest within the mightiest; it becomes
    the banker better than his yacht, houses and credit cards.
    Or his interceptor that shows the force of his financial power,
    the attribute to awe and respect,
    wherein doth sit the want and fears of presidents.
    But mercy is above, all the interest paid;
    it is enthroned in the hearts of rulers;
    it is an attribute of God himself;
    and earthly power doth then show like God's
    when mercy seasons payments made

    Today the bankers got their pound of flesh,
    taken without a drop of their debtors blood,
    by trickery and stealth they sold the bond anew,
    Conditioning only bankers would on forfeit be paid,
    Today their massive bonuses just keep on rolling in
    thanks to discarding rules that friendly politicians gave
    The few over the many have once again prevailed,
    taking food from mouths of babes never leaving just a scrap,
    So the world does bleed and people to riot make,
    Named and shamed by the media all clapping all in glee,
    whilst the financiers continue in their golden silent anonymity
    Their selfish genes now in confidence grow;
    Sneering at the masses all suffering down below,
    but altruistic genes will in their off spring grow.

    Inspired by the film Inside Job

Leave a comment

You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.