Dollars To Donuts You Don’t Have The Gastrointestinal Fortitude To Beat Vikram Pandit At His Own Game

“Citi North America Markets is raising money for the Police & Fire Widows’ & Childrens’ Benefit Fund- with an official food eating challenge. From an email sent today to all markets employees (Fixed Income, Equities, Commodities, Currencies)…”

“In honor of our police men and women, the week of October 10th brings a donut eating contest. Each trading floor owns a day that week to help raise money for the cause.”

The rules aren’t entirely clear but it seems like the challenge will be your choice of 50 donut holes or whoever eats the most holes in 15 minutes.

(hidden for your protection)
Show all comments

50 Responses to “Dollars To Donuts You Don’t Have The Gastrointestinal Fortitude To Beat Vikram Pandit At His Own Game”

  1. Michael Moore says:

    Only reason I would step foot in Citi

  2. guest says:

    Bess, I was about to comment "Feast or Famine around here" and this happens to be the first article?

  3. Guest says:

    Not the first time donuts have been distributed at Citi this year

  4. Backdoor_Bess says:

    "whoever eats the most holes in 15 minutes" = new event at the 2012 Porn-lympics

  5. ShortNaked says:

    This is Copist. Someone at Citi needs to examine their motives.

  6. Kegels123 says:

    Where do I sign up?

    -Michael Moore

  7. Bill Gross says:


  8. Below Me says:

    Fucking corrupt banksters buying the NYPD with doughnuts….

    – Occupy Wall Street Hipster

  9. Spider Pig says:

    Soup to nuts, Bess's inbox is a god damn national treasure!

  10. Guest says:

    I would have expected something more creative out of Vik like a pakora eating contest.

  11. CoveredLong says:

    "The rules aren’t entirely clear…."

    I didn't know Dodd-Frank had a section on eating challenges.

  12. Julian Robertson says:

    Just because it's for charity, that doesn't mean it ought to be fat-tax exempt.

  13. Guest says:

    But where are the investor's doughnuts?

    – John A. Paulson

  14. MeVC says:

    For a moment there I thought the contestants were the cops…

  15. WCrasher says:

    Citi & Wollensky

  16. Pete says:

    UBS had a similar contest – it was who could lose the most money the fastest.

  17. Guestimate says:

    An eating contest? Apparently he prefers being known as Wide Chops.

  18. Sooooo says:

    Are we going to get a legit article today or what?

  19. Mike Bullard says:

    WTF are donut holes???! Ohhh you mean TIMBITS!

  20. Some Guy says:

    Begging on your knees in DC for taxpayer money to pay your bonus is the NKI.