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Laughed THROUGH THE TEARS, That Is

On Thursday night Stephen Schwarzman delivered the keynote speech at the Alfred E. Smith Memorial Foundation Dinner, an annual Catholic charity fund-raiser named in honor of the former governor of New York. By tradition, the keynote speaker of the 66-year-old event is supposed to deliver a mostly humorous speech, and Mr. Schwarzman’s roughly 15-minute peroration was laced with humor…[Such as] the line that brought the house down: “Brian Moynihan is here tonight. He’s the C.E.O. of Bank of America. As many of you know, Brian’s brother Patrick runs a Catholic boarding school in Haiti. Their parents must be so proud to see two of their boys running an underfunded, nonprofit organization. Even Mr. Moynihan, who was in the audience, laughed.” [Dealbook]

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114 Responses to “Laughed THROUGH THE TEARS, That Is”

  1. guestapo says:

    Burn!

  2. guest says:

    LOL on the image file name.

  3. Texashedge says:

    I actually think the Vatican is pretty well-funded

  4. Guesty says:

    There is a difference between nonprofit and no profit.

  5. Moynie says:

    Yeah, but my brother's non-profit doesn't pay him millions while he runs it into the ground!

    *crickets*

    Tough crowd…

  6. early_hominid says:

    "Blackstone staff members took weeks to write the speech . . .."

    Lame. On many levels.

  7. You ever eat cheese? Cheese is a funny thing. Cheese is a strange thing. I always wonder where…

    *puke*

    -Cliff Asness

  8. Guest says:

    So does this mean I can get a tax deduction for my BAC shares?

    -Everyone reaping the benefits of what the orange man sowed

  9. Guesty says:

    But Patrick's employees are the ones who know their work will one day make a difference.

    Deck chairs. Now in the shape of a figure eight. Go!

  10. Alt_EST says:

    Boarding school in Haiti? New school for the recruitment list!

    -UBS HR MD

  11. RichieRich says:

    But what about the legitimate years??

    -KL

  12. Guest says:

    But, as I pointed out to those seated at my table. If I was CEO of Blackstone, the company would be twice the size it is right now. I'm telling you, that place is loaded. There's no question about it.

    –Brian Moynihan

  13. Critic says:

    Jeffrey Epstein could have done more with that material.

  14. guest says:

    "Bank of America would like you to also know that we can combine your meal, beverage, and desert into a single meal that will take advantage of all the synergies that only an insttution of our size can offer."

  15. Guest says:

    The kids at the boarding school have a much brighter future than B of A employees

  16. Put_Option says:

    Choate, Taft, Deerfield, Exeter = Real Boarding Schools

    No more Canadian Hockey PGs.

  17. W Buffett says:

    Bad joke.

  18. Guest says:

    I haven't seen Frank's dad in like eight years.

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