Hedge Funds

Stripper Turned “Hedge Fund Manager” Smoking The Competition

Though they’ve got three more months to turn things around, 2011 is on track to be a year most hedge fund managers would like to forget, performance-wise. John Paulson can’t catch a break, Whitney Tilson is having PTSD flashbacks to 2008 and even among those making money, the gains are a measly 3 or 4 percent a month. One investor who stands out from the crowd? Marx NY Capital founder Niki M. Three years ago Niki was a stripper, first at Sapphire New York, then at HQ Gentleman’s Club, using the gig as “a way to advance her financial career,” and now? She’s running her own show and scoring triple digit returns so far this year, according to the latest letter to investors posted on her Facebook page.

Though she won’t disclose her strategy, managers who could use a little get up and go this quarter, lest your LP’s redeem en masse, ought to take a gander at some of Niki’s investing pearls of wisdom.

That Marx not only makes the market her bitch but also provides intraday updates and has time to launch a music career should be a wake up call to you all.

Stripper-Turned-Hedge-Fund-Manager In Legal Battle With Former Club [FINalternatives]
At The End Of Her Grope [NYP]
Niki Marx [Facebook]
@NikiMarx [Twitter]

(hidden for your protection)
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121 Responses to “Stripper Turned “Hedge Fund Manager” Smoking The Competition”

  1. IgnorantBastards says:

    just priceless

  2. Backdoor_Bess says:

    You may be a wolf, but you have the mouth of a catfish.

  3. pazzo83 says:

    Hey what the fuck Niki??

    – Wilbur

    • Guest says:

      Umm she said "pics get slaughtered" (sic) so relax bro. Chick loves facebook but hates photo albums.

  4. Cut Me says:

    1. Give stripper money
    2. ????
    3. Profit

    Don't know about the rest of you, but cycle usually ends at 1.

  5. guest says:

    Wolves get rabies and chase mine workers around to steal their sandwiches. Not to mention what they do to chicks in red hoodies.

    – Guest with commodities experience

  6. Backdoor_Bess says:

    I am sure her 4,863 friends (4,852 of which are middle-aged males who have never been laid and are most likely not accredited investors) are more interested in her investment strategy than seeing photos of her vagine.

  7. Cut Me says:

    1. Give stripper money
    2. ????
    3. Profit

    I don't know about the rest of you, but my business plan usually ends at 1.

  8. guest says:

    Pigs get slaughtered! Say it isn't so.


  9. Zoroz says:

    Sounds legit. Where do I send the check?

  10. B2b MD says:

    Dude looks like a lady….

  11. Mexi_Cant says:

    I get lingerie jobs also, but my grandmother fails to support them.

    -Ping Jiang Capital Analyst

  12. Backdoor_Bess says:

    She's also on Linkedin, so she must be legit.

  13. The Fapper says:

    I just made a contribution to my FapFapFap fund.

  14. Dr_Rosenrose says:

    You're a fucking brave wolf son, but you have no father or mother??

  15. Not Impressed says:

    Finally, a legitimate business reason to expense my visits to the strip club! I was doing due-dil.

  16. Golden Boy says:

    Who knew straddling could be so profitable.

  17. 2_Small_2_Bail says:

    Triple digit returns are only available when all 3 holes are open for business.

    -N. Marx

  18. Golden Boy says:

    "She went so far as to say that the American Stock Exchange and Deutche Borse Group are two of her favourite activities"

  19. Golden Boy says:

    Why's there a nose next to her vagina?

  20. inlovewithpmco says:

    pmco what is your performance?

  21. Guest says:

    Unitl 6/08, my fund was up 12% annulaized for decade with no down years. I never told anyone how I created the returns. Here is a big tip, once your investors start asking for the capital back move to a quite palce in South America.

    B. Madoff

  22. Anonymous says:

    I'd hire her.
    (she'd need to audition for me, of course)
    Beamer's Talent Manager

  23. Nailz6 says:

    Requesting Niki as a friend so I can get in on these hot tits, i mean tips.

  24. NowOnePerson says:

    She said it was a long/short strategy, but I'm just getting longer.

  25. guest says:

    i could see here doing those kinds of returns. buy a $200 bag of weed, sell it to your johns for $320 e z $.

  26. Guest says:

    I would hire this girl in a minute

    -Donny Deutsch

  27. Guest says:

    I bet she wont lets guys cum in her mouth.

    – L. Tilton

  28. guest says:

    According to the prospectus, investments must be made in "dance dollars," which can be purchased with a credit card for a 10% premium.

  29. BrotherLehman says:

    But why do all my clients ask me if I have Banco Santander?

    –N Marx

  30. bartleby says:

    Wtf? I don't belive she has even a cent under management.

    • bartleby says:

      No finra anything, the company website links to godaddy. Unless she's spreading over a dark pool or teanding on the curb in front of ricks, she is for certain not in the biz……meaning I just found my scpring temp!

    • guest says:

      WTF? You actually need to say you don't believe it when it's patently obvious to everyone that she obviously does not manage other people's money? (See tag: "loose definitions of the word hedge fund" as well as, y'know, the fact that she's fucking posting about her "returns" on facebook.

  31. guest says:

    I'm not interested. Last time I invested in Marx Capital my wealth ended up getting redistributed to the proletariat.

  32. slainwaxwing says:

    Fuck: Karl must be turning over in his grave.

  33. PermaGuestII says:

    Bing image search for this chick wins the award for "most NSFW content on one screen."

  34. Guest says:

    Looks like we found our new CEO.

    –UBS HR

  35. Too Legit to Quit says:

    Is she for real?


  36. Sleeper says:

    Boycotting basic punctuation is the NKI.

  37. Mexi_Cant says:

    I bet she tastes like Yom Kippur dinner.

  38. - Analyst says:

    I guess anyone can be a hedge fund manager these days. Anyone who solicits their earnings on FB is a loser…. this is embarrasing!

  39. MeVC says:

    Nikki < Niki < NKI

  40. 5Hours Till Bed says:

    Tonight I'm going to replace pmco's avatar with Niki

  41. fred schwed says:

    Where are the customers' boobie tassels?

  42. guest says:

    Oh please let her be the next DB interview.

  43. Lenny Fan says:

    She obviously has a tremendous amount of raw investment talent that just needs a bit of mentoring and guidance while she fully matures. Maybe someone could introduce her to Lenny Dykstra who could bring in his years of street-honed experience as well as build a first-class back office. They could potentially be the new Graham/Dodd of the investment world.

  44. seadragonconquerer says:

    Heard about Niki on – I'm not kidding – Roger Hedgecock's radio show. Some kind of synchronicity at work here.

  45. DB1 says:

    Brutal market these days, I'm mostly in cash… finally someone who can take the liquidity out of my pipeline.

  46. Wipes says:

    Pairs up great with your face.

  47. marlinspike says:

    Well I've read all the comments and despair at the humour of the hedge funding community…..could be argued that all of you are not good for much. Niki if you do in fact exist….go for it, you get very few chances in this life. I won't bother you with platitudes of the type "don't worry about these comments" as I am pretty sure you are tough enough to take care of yourself.

  48. PermaGuestII says:

    Yes: and she's definitely into money (shots)

  49. Guest says:

    pump and dump…she's an expert .

  50. Gordon says:

    ha, Gordon is not spelled Gorden..
    All mouth and no trousers pun intended.

  51. Would still hit it says:

    Don't worry, I'm all over it.

    – E. Spitzer

  52. DLP says:

    Give her a break. She isn't the 1st woman to use sex to advance their career! The issue is, these women want attention and when they get it, they cry wolf! But since she isn't registered with the SEC, she probably still is relying on past methods for financial assistance. Remember old habits that work are hard to break!

  53. Jackson Pollock says:

    I’d pump and dump all over her face

  54. Golden Boy says:

    This story makes me harder than reading about the Jamie Leigh Jones case.

  55. Chuck says:

    Alone, the Gryphon Financial are incredible, together they are unstoppable.

  56. she is on youtube. http://www.youtube.com/user/NIKIMARX?feature=mhsn

    guess what, peeps? She's a singer! Haters will hate…

  57. jewjuanton says:

    Senior Alpha II reigns supreme with 1700% trades on a monthly basis. 10% is for amateurs and Timothy Sykes type followers.

  58. noneimportant says:

    well i hear she s got bigger problems than being the parody of masturbating hedgers, some friend told me about HIV concern, hope its not true

  59. Asa says:

    Wow- I friended her on Linkedin after reading this article to get the inside scoop…. She had two connections. She's got a 150+ who are some solid financial players. But most importantly, she just sent me her latest music video. LOLZ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSFuHiKUSuk http://www.nikimarx.net

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  70. pazzo83 says:

    What's FINRA?

    – Goldman Sachs & Co.

  71. SEC says:

    Back off FINRA, that kind of assets falls in our jurisdiction