Though they’ve got three more months to turn things around, 2011 is on track to be a year most hedge fund managers would like to forget, performance-wise. John Paulson can’t catch a break, Whitney Tilson is having PTSD flashbacks to 2008 and even among those making money, the gains are a measly 3 or 4 percent a month. One investor who stands out from the crowd? Marx NY Capital founder Niki M. Three years ago Niki was a stripper, first at Sapphire New York, then at HQ Gentleman’s Club, using the gig as “a way to advance her financial career,” and now? She’s running her own show and scoring triple digit returns so far this year, according to the latest letter to investors posted on her Facebook page.

Though she won’t disclose her strategy, managers who could use a little get up and go this quarter, lest your LP’s redeem en masse, ought to take a gander at some of Niki’s investing pearls of wisdom.

That Marx not only makes the market her bitch but also provides intraday updates and has time to launch a music career should be a wake up call to you all.

Stripper-Turned-Hedge-Fund-Manager In Legal Battle With Former Club [FINalternatives]
At The End Of Her Grope [NYP]
Niki Marx [Facebook]
@NikiMarx [Twitter]

121 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (121)

  1. Posted by IgnorantBastards | October 6, 2011 at 2:46 PM

    just priceless

  2. Posted by Backdoor_Bess | October 6, 2011 at 2:48 PM

    You may be a wolf, but you have the mouth of a catfish.

  3. Posted by pazzo83 | October 6, 2011 at 2:49 PM

    Hey what the fuck Niki??

    - Wilbur

  4. Posted by Cut Me | October 6, 2011 at 2:52 PM

    1. Give stripper money
    2. ????
    3. Profit

    Don't know about the rest of you, but cycle usually ends at 1.

  5. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 2:53 PM

    Wolves get rabies and chase mine workers around to steal their sandwiches. Not to mention what they do to chicks in red hoodies.

    - Guest with commodities experience

  6. Posted by Backdoor_Bess | October 6, 2011 at 2:53 PM

    I am sure her 4,863 friends (4,852 of which are middle-aged males who have never been laid and are most likely not accredited investors) are more interested in her investment strategy than seeing photos of her vagine.

  7. Posted by Cut Me | October 6, 2011 at 2:54 PM

    1. Give stripper money
    2. ????
    3. Profit

    I don't know about the rest of you, but my business plan usually ends at 1.

  8. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 2:54 PM

    Pigs get slaughtered! Say it isn't so.

    ~Wilbur

  9. Posted by Zoroz | October 6, 2011 at 2:54 PM

    Sounds legit. Where do I send the check?

  10. Posted by B2b MD | October 6, 2011 at 2:55 PM

    Dude looks like a lady….

  11. Posted by pazzo83 | October 6, 2011 at 2:56 PM

    What's FINRA?

    - Goldman Sachs & Co.

  12. Posted by Cut Me | October 6, 2011 at 2:57 PM

    SHIT!

  13. Posted by Mexi_Cant | October 6, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    I get lingerie jobs also, but my grandmother fails to support them.

    -Ping Jiang Capital Analyst

  14. Posted by Backdoor_Bess | October 6, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    She's also on Linkedin, so she must be legit.

  15. Posted by The Fapper | October 6, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    I just made a contribution to my FapFapFap fund.

  16. Posted by Dr_Rosenrose | October 6, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    You're a fucking brave wolf son, but you have no father or mother??

  17. Posted by Ball Buster | October 6, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    Was thinking the same thing.

  18. Posted by Not Impressed | October 6, 2011 at 2:59 PM

    Finally, a legitimate business reason to expense my visits to the strip club! I was doing due-dil.

  19. Posted by Golden Boy | October 6, 2011 at 3:00 PM

    Who knew straddling could be so profitable.

  20. Posted by george | October 6, 2011 at 3:00 PM

    Looks like she's losing her battle with spelling.

  21. Posted by 2_Small_2_Bail | October 6, 2011 at 2:01 PM

    Triple digit returns are only available when all 3 holes are open for business.

    -N. Marx

  22. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:02 PM

    I think you have never been laid. If you had, you would know that girls these days frequently have penises.

    - Analyst

  23. Posted by Golden Boy | October 6, 2011 at 3:03 PM

    "She went so far as to say that the American Stock Exchange and Deutche Borse Group are two of her favourite activities"

  24. Posted by Golden Boy | October 6, 2011 at 3:10 PM

    Why's there a nose next to her vagina?

  25. Posted by inlovewithpmco | October 6, 2011 at 3:10 PM

    pmco what is your performance?

  26. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:11 PM

    Unitl 6/08, my fund was up 12% annulaized for decade with no down years. I never told anyone how I created the returns. Here is a big tip, once your investors start asking for the capital back move to a quite palce in South America.

    B. Madoff

  27. Posted by Jpm | October 6, 2011 at 3:13 PM

    Last time I saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it!

  28. Posted by Anonymous | October 6, 2011 at 3:13 PM

    I'd hire her.
    (she'd need to audition for me, of course)
    Beamer's Talent Manager

  29. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:14 PM

    "favourite?" you limey fck, i knew it!

  30. Posted by PermaGuestII | October 6, 2011 at 3:15 PM

    Not for her.

  31. Posted by Nailz6 | October 6, 2011 at 3:16 PM

    Requesting Niki as a friend so I can get in on these hot tits, i mean tips.

  32. Posted by NowOnePerson | October 6, 2011 at 3:17 PM

    She said it was a long/short strategy, but I'm just getting longer.

  33. Posted by Golden Boy | October 6, 2011 at 3:18 PM

    See those funny upside down commas? . That usually means copy – paste

  34. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:25 PM

    i could see here doing those kinds of returns. buy a $200 bag of weed, sell it to your johns for $320 e z $.

  35. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:27 PM

    I would hire this girl in a minute

    -Donny Deutsch

  36. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:27 PM

    I bet she wont lets guys cum in her mouth.

    - L. Tilton

  37. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:33 PM

    According to the prospectus, investments must be made in "dance dollars," which can be purchased with a credit card for a 10% premium.

  38. Posted by IncredulousinSeattle | October 6, 2011 at 3:33 PM

    Who stole Golden Boy's user name?

  39. Posted by BrotherLehman | October 6, 2011 at 3:35 PM

    But why do all my clients ask me if I have Banco Santander?

    –N Marx

  40. Posted by bartleby | October 6, 2011 at 3:38 PM

    Wtf? I don't belive she has even a cent under management.

  41. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 2:40 PM

    I'm not interested. Last time I invested in Marx Capital my wealth ended up getting redistributed to the proletariat.

  42. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 3:44 PM

    Your spelling, it hurts my eyes.

  43. Posted by SEC | October 6, 2011 at 3:44 PM

    Back off FINRA, that kind of assets falls in our jurisdiction

  44. Posted by slainwaxwing | October 6, 2011 at 3:54 PM

    Fuck: Karl must be turning over in his grave.

  45. Posted by PermaGuestII | October 6, 2011 at 4:01 PM

    Bing image search for this chick wins the award for "most NSFW content on one screen."

  46. Posted by slainwaxwing | October 6, 2011 at 4:04 PM

    Ping image search for this chick win award for "Not Enough Marker."

  47. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 4:10 PM

    Looks like we found our new CEO.

    –UBS HR

  48. Posted by PermaGuestII | October 6, 2011 at 4:11 PM

    Think she'd need something bigger than a marker…

  49. Posted by Too Legit to Quit | October 6, 2011 at 4:11 PM

    Is she for real?

    -K.Adoboli

  50. Posted by Nailz6 | October 6, 2011 at 4:17 PM

    Apparently she's short right now, don't know why you'd be long

  51. Posted by Sleeper | October 6, 2011 at 4:26 PM

    Boycotting basic punctuation is the NKI.

  52. Posted by Mexi_Cant | October 6, 2011 at 4:31 PM

    I bet she tastes like Yom Kippur dinner.

  53. Posted by Damien | October 6, 2011 at 4:45 PM

    Born of a jackal biatch

  54. Posted by N. Marx | October 6, 2011 at 4:50 PM

    Misprint, cash only.

  55. Posted by Bored analyst | October 6, 2011 at 4:54 PM

    LMFAO!!

  56. Posted by - Analyst | October 6, 2011 at 5:04 PM

    I guess anyone can be a hedge fund manager these days. Anyone who solicits their earnings on FB is a loser…. this is embarrasing!

  57. Posted by bartleby | October 6, 2011 at 5:05 PM

    No finra anything, the company website links to godaddy. Unless she's spreading over a dark pool or teanding on the curb in front of ricks, she is for certain not in the biz……meaning I just found my scpring temp!

  58. Posted by bartleby | October 6, 2011 at 5:06 PM

    Trading, that is.

  59. Posted by MeVC | October 6, 2011 at 5:46 PM

    Nikki < Niki < NKI

  60. Posted by 5Hours Till Bed | October 6, 2011 at 5:49 PM

    Tonight I'm going to replace pmco's avatar with Niki

  61. Posted by trojan_ | October 6, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    that's why the good Lord gave us the sport of Noodling

  62. Posted by fred schwed | October 6, 2011 at 6:12 PM

    Where are the customers' boobie tassels?

  63. Posted by Sergie Brin | October 6, 2011 at 6:17 PM

    I'm not getting anything…. post your search URL

  64. Posted by im_new_here | October 6, 2011 at 6:17 PM

    Thought that was a typo for teabagging.

  65. Posted by guestapo | October 6, 2011 at 6:20 PM

    I love that you took the time to research this. Not one person thought she was an actual "hedge fund manager," rather than a stripper who learned how to day trade her own tips.

  66. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 6:21 PM

    WTF? You actually need to say you don't believe it when it's patently obvious to everyone that she obviously does not manage other people's money? (See tag: "loose definitions of the word hedge fund" as well as, y'know, the fact that she's fucking posting about her "returns" on facebook.

  67. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 6:30 PM

    Or return her empties.

  68. Posted by guest | October 6, 2011 at 7:00 PM

    Oh please let her be the next DB interview.

  69. Posted by Lenny Fan | October 6, 2011 at 7:25 PM

    She obviously has a tremendous amount of raw investment talent that just needs a bit of mentoring and guidance while she fully matures. Maybe someone could introduce her to Lenny Dykstra who could bring in his years of street-honed experience as well as build a first-class back office. They could potentially be the new Graham/Dodd of the investment world.

  70. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 7:45 PM

    Or stuffed in her thong.

  71. Posted by Guest | October 6, 2011 at 8:32 PM

    A few too many guys jerking it for my taste.

    – Guy who's browsing anyway

  72. Posted by BlipBlop | October 6, 2011 at 9:21 PM

    Pulled up a Demi Marx, in a pic titled "18 inches of pain". Good pic though.

  73. Posted by seadragonconquerer | October 6, 2011 at 10:23 PM

    Heard about Niki on – I'm not kidding – Roger Hedgecock's radio show. Some kind of synchronicity at work here.

  74. Posted by James | October 6, 2011 at 11:28 PM

    Agreed.

  75. Posted by DB1 | October 7, 2011 at 12:32 AM

    Brutal market these days, I'm mostly in cash… finally someone who can take the liquidity out of my pipeline.

  76. Posted by Grave Digger | October 7, 2011 at 1:04 AM

    Hottest piece of tail he would get.

  77. Posted by 2Lazy 2Login | October 7, 2011 at 1:05 AM

    C.E.hO

  78. Posted by Wipes | October 7, 2011 at 2:37 AM

    Pairs up great with your face.

  79. Posted by marlinspike | October 7, 2011 at 3:57 AM

    Well I've read all the comments and despair at the humour of the hedge funding community…..could be argued that all of you are not good for much. Niki if you do in fact exist….go for it, you get very few chances in this life. I won't bother you with platitudes of the type "don't worry about these comments" as I am pretty sure you are tough enough to take care of yourself.

  80. Posted by FKApmco | October 7, 2011 at 7:34 AM

    My clients are up all the time and my lingerie jobs are legendary.

  81. Posted by FKApmco | October 7, 2011 at 7:41 AM

    Ouch, that really, really, really hurts.

  82. Posted by Dr Livingstone | October 7, 2011 at 8:35 AM

    Last time I saw a mouth like that it had my cock in it!

  83. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 9:05 AM

    Umm she said "pics get slaughtered" (sic) so relax bro. Chick loves facebook but hates photo albums.

  84. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 9:07 AM

    Ha!

  85. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 9:10 AM

    Pretty sure she has no idea what platitudes mean…son!

  86. Posted by Cut Me | October 7, 2011 at 9:25 AM

    He's turning over to reach for some tissues and lotion…

  87. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 9:27 AM

    you mean DP

  88. Posted by guesticles | October 7, 2011 at 9:35 AM

    Who let this fucking guy in?

  89. Posted by PermaGuestII | October 7, 2011 at 9:58 AM

    Yes: and she's definitely into money (shots)

  90. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 10:11 AM

    I do so! It's that funny looking animal in Australia.

  91. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 10:11 AM

    -N. Marx

  92. Posted by Lenny Fan | October 7, 2011 at 10:34 AM

    The hedge funding community is a different blog; we're actually the hedge FUN community. This is just our way of giving Niki a coarse but warm welcome – kind of like the bouncer at her strip club whipping out his pecker and asking for a Beezer on her first day of work.

    Stick around, you'll really like us once you get to know us.

  93. Posted by PermaGuestII | October 7, 2011 at 10:41 AM

    I knew you were going to say that before you said it.

    -D. Gartman

  94. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 10:44 AM

    pump and dump…she's an expert .

  95. Posted by Guest | October 7, 2011 at 11:22 AM

    Bulls/pics/wolf$>MBA>CFA

  96. Posted by Gordon | October 7, 2011 at 11:49 AM

    ha, Gordon is not spelled Gorden..
    All mouth and no trousers pun intended.

  97. Posted by Asmydadwouldsay | October 7, 2011 at 12:10 PM

    All mouth and no trousers on this one…

  98. Posted by Would still hit it | October 7, 2011 at 1:15 PM

    Don't worry, I'm all over it.

    - E. Spitzer

  99. Posted by DLP | October 7, 2011 at 2:49 PM

    Give her a break. She isn't the 1st woman to use sex to advance their career! The issue is, these women want attention and when they get it, they cry wolf! But since she isn't registered with the SEC, she probably still is relying on past methods for financial assistance. Remember old habits that work are hard to break!

  100. Posted by Jackson Pollock | October 7, 2011 at 2:58 PM

    I’d pump and dump all over her face

  101. Posted by Tranny | October 7, 2011 at 3:41 PM

    Especially ones in banking…..

  102. Posted by Golden Boy | October 7, 2011 at 5:26 PM

    This story makes me harder than reading about the Jamie Leigh Jones case.

  103. Posted by abh | October 8, 2011 at 3:28 PM

    jajajaaaa!!

  104. Posted by MeVC | October 9, 2011 at 1:48 AM

    Try direct deposit instead.

  105. Posted by Chuck | October 13, 2011 at 10:49 AM

    Alone, the Gryphon Financial are incredible, together they are unstoppable.

  106. Posted by gallagher0189 | October 16, 2011 at 2:34 PM

    she is on youtube. http://www.youtube.com/user/NIKIMARX?feature=mhsn

    guess what, peeps? She's a singer! Haters will hate…

  107. Posted by jewjuanton | November 9, 2011 at 2:26 AM

    Senior Alpha II reigns supreme with 1700% trades on a monthly basis. 10% is for amateurs and Timothy Sykes type followers.

  108. Posted by noneimportant | December 16, 2011 at 9:35 PM

    well i hear she s got bigger problems than being the parody of masturbating hedgers, some friend told me about HIV concern, hope its not true

  109. Posted by lolz3 | December 16, 2011 at 9:41 PM

    ROTFLMAO best cpmment ever

  110. Posted by long against the box | December 17, 2011 at 1:30 PM

    am i in a time warp ?

    i think i read these comments a month ago

    still amusinh

  111. Posted by Asa | January 9, 2012 at 7:18 PM

    Wow- I friended her on Linkedin after reading this article to get the inside scoop…. She had two connections. She's got a 150+ who are some solid financial players. But most importantly, she just sent me her latest music video. LOLZ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSFuHiKUSuk http://www.nikimarx.net

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