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Which Chief Executive Officer Needs A Gun, A Plane Ticket, And Some Bleach?

The ultra-rich bankers, hedge fund managers and private equity executives of New York City have long enlisted private security firms to help safeguard them and their wealth. But as the mood on Main Street turns increasingly hostile, New York’s financial titans are cranking their security measures up to 11…One executive contacted Insite requesting help planning his escape from the United States in the event the federal government was overthrown, said Howard A. Shapiro, Insite’s chief technology officer. The executive wanted to know how much gold to keep on hand and how to escape the United States by submarine in the event of a major incident. [NYT via BI, related]

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70 Responses to “Which Chief Executive Officer Needs A Gun, A Plane Ticket, And Some Bleach?”

  1. Horn says:

    Szekely ftmfw!

  2. guest says:

    Louis CK reference FTW.

  3. guest says:

    'pizza'

    I see what you did there.

    -ESL

  4. Guest says:

    …..These go to eleven

    Nigel

  5. InfiniteGuest says:

    Clues: worried about a coup, long physical gold, escaping by submarine.
    Must be an underwater HF manager.

  6. Spanishmoon says:

    I note that there was no mention of an exit strategy for either a wife or a pot-bellied pig

    • Napoleon & Squealer says:

      Oh we have plans for dealing with that sellout Wilbur

      -Pigs finding OWS to actually be more pleasant than shit

  7. HAM05 says:

    Tepper, w giant cock shaped submarine

  8. AIG Quant via LEH says:

    I guess Insite just lost that account.

  9. Roy says:

    Not sure where he intends to go with this submarine?

  10. Blanus says:

    Why the bleach?

    -greggums

  11. Curious Professional says:

    A submarine? Get serious – this cannot be for real. Now if he'd asked for a battleship and a dozen strippers…

  12. 25th Hour Trader says:

    One of the advantages of living in a refrigerator box is that no one knows you're a hedge fund manager.

    -W. Tilson

  13. Capt Nemo says:

    Clearly can't be Lloyd. He of all people should know the dangers of being a mystery man who lives out of a submarine

  14. Deep Throat says:

    you didn't hear it from me, but that executive's name starts with a B and ends with Obama

  15. Heffy says:

    WTF! I'd booby trap my mansion/palace/casa with loads of body wash, lice medication and shampoo. That alone will hold up against the OWS masses for a couple a weeks.

    – H. Hefner

  16. UFO says:

    This sounds reasonable, it's good to be prepared.

    – bought to you by the generation of "we all live in a yellow submarine"

  17. Ken Lewis says:

    This guy is genius!

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