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Davos Wife Suggests Placing Bets On Which Attendee Is Most Likely To Knock Up A Local Now

As you may have heard, the World Economic Forum kicks off in Switzerland this week and fresh off of last year’s report on the Bitches o’ Davos (in descending order: The Wives, The Mistresses, The Aspiring Mistresses), Anya Schiffrin (wife of Joseph Stiglitz) is back with a few tips for her fellow second-class citizens.

1. “Moisturizer is crucial”
2. She’s watching you (“You can carbon date Davos Wives by their shoes. Newcomers tend to wear attractively dainty heels. Veterans like me have given up. I don sturdy shoes and try not to slip on the ice.”)
3. If find yourself bored or with time on your hands, she’s not saying she’s passed many an entertaining few hours watching George Soros slip a snow bunny the old Jorge in a steamed-up Gondola but she’s not not saying it. (“A lot of untoward groping goes on after hours and that is discussed quietly rather than openly…There are always a lot of men who become “geographically single” when they arrive, and even the nerdiest expert in anti-malarial bed nets or obscure financial instruments fancies himself a player the moment he steps foot in the Zurich airport. Late at night, these men can be found eyeing the local talent, and there are rumors of at least one baby being born nine months after a night of passion at Davos.”)

Confessions of a Davos spouse [Reuters via Daily Intel]

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26 Responses to “Davos Wife Suggests Placing Bets On Which Attendee Is Most Likely To Knock Up A Local Now”

  1. guest says:

    it was me!!

    -nouriel roubs

  2. Guest says:

    Every day I'm Schiffrin.

  3. @MulletFarm says:

    at day care it has perpetual bed-head, foul breath & attitude, and stunted mental development from being conceived under the influence of Rohypnol

  4. Guest says:

    Until there's a website for Davos groupies to compare note (like the Baller Groupies do) please feel free to post the details here. Ignore the negative comments, just share.

  5. Guest says:

    Hold all my calls.

    – L Tilton

  6. derp says:

    Why didn't any of you clue me in on this "geographically single" shit?

    -Kobe

    • Pedantic Guy says:

      Listen Kobe. You don't want to get involved in any of this. The rules are just to complicated for the average sportsman to understand. For example, if I travel to some Scandanavian country, I get to be "geographically single." So I thought, well, I have this Scandanavian wife, and she's just as far away from home as I would be if I was in Davos. Which makes her "geographically single." Ergo, I too must be "geographically single" right? Right? Wrong. And we're not talking wrong like fucking a girl so trashy Bill Clinton would think twice. I think we can both agree that that's the I-Know-It's-Wrong-But-It-Feels-So-Good kind of wrong that we both love. No, I mean more like the lose half a bill and your career wrong. Leave it to the bankers.

      T. Woods

      P.S. Mary Joe and Betty Sue just called. We still on for tonight our double tonight?

  7. Assburgher says:

    In terms of all but the locals, "The odds are good but the goods are odd."

  8. Damit Donny says:

    typo: past / passed…
    (sorry)

  9. Kegels123 says:

    Having old wrinkled balls and nailing some fine local Swiss ass is the NKI.

  10. materhorn says:

    i will be commemorating davos with a deck of playing cards.

    Mrs. C.

  11. VonSloneker says:

    Awww man…thought I'd gotten away with one. OK, the baby is mine…

    – Tom Brady, babymaker extraordinaire (sometimes QB)

  12. Guest says:

    A baby born in Europe? I don't believe it.

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