Teenage Girl’s “Body Parts,” “Confidence” Have Been Sticking Out To CNBC Reporter Darren Rovell For Months

This is his story.

In October 2010, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit editor MJ Day had invited me to show up to a model’s body painting, even though the issue wouldn’t be out for four months. I couldn’t say anything about who she was and MJ only allowed me to tweet body parts. But I knew this 18-year-old girl was a star. She had the personality – a childish laugh, a great sense of humor – and the non-traditional body that SI loved. Sports Illustrated has made a name by steering away from the skinny model craze and pushing more towards women of more normal proportions. What stood out to me? Confidence. She knew what she wanted and she was going to get it. She told me her dream had always been to be in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue and she came to IMG to represent her because she they had faith that she could crack the issue at 18, young by the issue’s standards. That she did.

Sports Illustrated Had To Put Kate Upton On The Cover [CNBC]
Related: Darren Rovell Gets On One Knee, Asks Kate Upton To Be His Valentine, Is Rejected [Deadspin]

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47 Responses to “Teenage Girl’s “Body Parts,” “Confidence” Have Been Sticking Out To CNBC Reporter Darren Rovell For Months”

  1. ShortNaked says:

    I'd like to shove my equity right in the middle of those synthetic CDO tranches.

    • Stevie says:

      I just like to f*ck those titties myself

    • PermaGuestII says:

      If that is a "woman of normal proportions" then I'm the King of Rumania.

      • LondonGuest says:

        ROmania or did you mean Rumelia (which would serve the joke better seeing that Rumelia was not a kingdom)
        – not the king of Romania

        • WSJevons says:

          The Kingdom of Rumania was in existence until the Kingdom signed an armistice agreeing to end hostilities against the Allies – primarily the U.S.S.R. and join the Allied fight against Germany and Hungary. The catalyst for the armistice was the arrest of the fascist dictator and replaced by a communist provisional government.

          It should be noted that the King (or Queen?) appealed to the fascists to repeal or not enforce many anti-semitic laws and policies; thereby saving many Jews.

          (I hope that I am not stepping on any Joke Briefer toes.)

    • Guest says:

      There is nothing synthetic about those CDO tranches.

  2. AIG Quant via LEH says:

    It's a good thing I'm WFH today.

  3. Horny Causation says:

    What is it happens to the Dow and S&P when an American girl makes the SI swimsuit issue cover? (That's the excuse I will have for having the issue on my desk.)

  4. Ex-HBCP Analyst says:

    No HB needed.

  5. Put_Option says:

    That was a really long-winded way to say 'Yea, I'd do her'

    • guestapo says:

      It's more like a long-winded way to say "if she's found chopped up in a trunk somewhere, there's a good chance it was me."

  6. PermaGuestII says:

    Alternative headline: "CNBC Reporter Darren Rovell Is Not Gay"

  7. pazzo83 says:


    – J Sandusky

  8. SImon says:

    Aww, but she could be so hot if she wanted to. She's like all these babes, you get their pilot lit, they could suck start a leafblower. And she's got the most incredible body too and a pair of titties that make you wanna stand up and beg for buttermilk. Ass like a ten year old boy!

  9. FKApmco says:

    Needs tag "happy V Day, love Bess"

  10. guestguest says:

    LOL @ the "related" link.

  11. Entendres Doubles says:

    So Rovell beat off the other early guessers for the win?

  12. Alt_EST says:

    [youtube FcJScBLIEX4 youtube]

    No one knows what it means, but its provactive. It gets…something moving.

    • Nailz6 says:

      Underaged Drinking Or: How I Manage to Ever Get Laid

    • Guest says:

      Hey, blue-shirted-eunuchs in the row in front of them. It's a time out! You don't need to watch the game.

      – Every other male resident of the Earth

    • Laxbro says:

      That YouTube video is the reason she's famous. Virals are pretty chill.

    • Brudda says:

      Hmmm, I personally don't see what the fuss is about. I mean is it the perky, youthful breasts, or that cutesy all american smile, or perhaps the almost certain knowledge that she'd conform to the Madonna/Whore paradigm…..okay, who am I kidding, it moved…..repeatedly.

    • 2StopShop says:

      Every time I watch this it makes me angry that I can't make her friend disappear.

  13. Jed Clampett says:

    Whooooooooo doggies!

  14. Guest says:

    Bet money they did it.

  15. Lucas v P says:

    Teach me how to Douglas!

  16. Stroke Magazine says:

    We tried to get her for the cover of our new golfing periodical but her "handlers" turned us down for some reason.

    -"Putt" Shank

  17. Stained Glass Repair says:

    For you Bishops out there, we offer low rates and quick service with money-back guarantees.

  18. Gart Man says:

    I knew she would be on the cover of SI six years ago.


  19. inlovewithpmco says:

    Sorry, she cannot hold a candle to Marisa Miller

  20. guestie says:

    Pancake boobs ftw.

  21. #57 says:

    fuck mark sanchez

  22. Extitdok says:

    для вечерние платья лето 2011 в моем интернет-магазине