Remember Nevin Shapiro? He’s the guy we named the Greatest Ponzi Schemer of All Time last August, over all other Ponzi schemers, Bernie included. While Madoff would have won if we were judging based on size alone, we weren’t. Shapiro took home the title because 1) with his ill-gotten gains, he made a name for himself in the University of Miami community and 2) he subsequently kicked things up a notch after being sent to jail, where he chose to fuck the Hurricanes’ football program raw, detailing the boatloads of prostitutes he bought for players (“I had the boat for prostitution situations”), the lavish meals he would treat them to at Benihanas, the “hit of the game” (Shapiro “put bounties on specific players, including Florida Gators quarterback Tim Tebow and a three-year standing bounty on Seminoles quarterback Chris Rix from 2002 to 2004, offering $5,000 to any player who knocked him out of a game”) and the dancer he gave $500 to have an abortion after she got knocked up by one of the athletes who he kept in the dark about the pregnancy (“I was doing him a favor–that idiot might have wanted to keep [the baby]”). Anyway, Nevs was pretty, pretty, pretty angry that none of his so-called boys stuck by him after the Ponzi charges came out, hence the disclosing of the hookers, etc and, apparently, he’s not finished letting everyone know how he feels.

“The public is going to hate me worse in the next coming months,” Shapiro, serving a 20-year sentence for a Ponzi scheme, wrote in numerous e-mails over the past few months. “It’s going to be severe and catastrophic. My feelings are getting inflamed and I’m going to pop off pretty soon with regards to them and the NCAA. I’m coming for them both [UM and former players] and I’m going to be successful. “I’m taking that program down to Chinatown and the former players and links to that program. Why? Because the U.S. government lined up 47 former players to testify against me in open court if I went to trial. That in itself is motivation to shove it up their collective [butts].”

If any current and future Ponzi schemers are reading- this is what you should be aspiring to.

NCAA investigation update: Nevin Shapiro rants from prison; UM optimistic [Miami Herald via Deadspin]
Report: Nevin Shapiro fires at Canes [ESPN]

15 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (15)

  1. Posted by Guest | February 13, 2012 at 8:03 PM

    Given that he's got 20 years in the slammer, I think he should be more concerned about something getting shoved up his "collective butt".

  2. Posted by Graduate GFY | February 13, 2012 at 8:17 PM

    A post at 7:53pm? Kind of a waste of good content…

  3. Posted by Xiangkov Smirnoff | February 13, 2012 at 8:25 PM

    In Chinatown, corrective butts shove you!

  4. Posted by Guest | February 13, 2012 at 8:40 PM

    And being inflamed. Gosh I'm clever.

  5. Posted by Guest | February 13, 2012 at 10:44 PM

    Shit just got real

  6. Posted by Paul Volker | February 14, 2012 at 8:04 AM

    Soooo, if we want dirt in the US gov't, we should lock up the guys running the FED ponzi?

    Oh shit, that's me….

  7. Posted by Guy with A.D.D. | February 14, 2012 at 8:57 AM

    Will the "shoving it up our collective butts" be taking place on his boat in the federal impound yard or will I have to visit his jail cell for mine?

    – Barney Frank

  8. Posted by guestq | February 14, 2012 at 9:02 AM

    He was a nerdy clinger college players used. There are 1,000s of losers just like him, but he suffers from some complex that makes him think he's special. Womp womp..

  9. Posted by Guest | February 14, 2012 at 9:24 AM

    Glad to have you on board.

    -Uncle Bernie

  10. Posted by Nevin R. Johnson | February 14, 2012 at 9:41 AM

    Well I'm gonna go then. And I don't need any of this. I don't need this stuff, and I don't need you. I don't need anything except this. And that's it and that's the only thing I need, is this. I don't need this or this. Just this hooker. And this football jersey, the hooker and the jersey and that's all I need. And this autographed ball. The hooker, the jersey, and the ball, and that's all I need.

  11. Posted by Every Seminole Fan | February 14, 2012 at 10:50 AM

    Guy is such an idiot. Should have paid the players $5k NOT to knock out Chris Rix.

  12. Posted by Perturbed sniper | February 14, 2012 at 11:05 AM

    Johnson, Navin R… Sounds like a typical bastard

  13. Posted by Guestest | February 14, 2012 at 1:13 PM

    (e)Book, TV series, video game, movie, prequel, failed campaign run after 20 years.

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