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Presenting: Executive Bitches

For Valentine’s Day this year, Fortune put together a slideshow of various executives, analysts, fund managers, and disgraced AIG CEOs posing with their one true loves– their dogs. For the big names who missed the deadline to submit photos, fear not– this feature is clearly going to become an annual thing. For those already mentally directing a photoshoot of yourself and Jamie the Younger, maybe running down Park Ave or shooting hoops at the Garden, you might first consider looking to this year’s pioneering efforts for inspiration.


For instance, in addition to putting your love for each other on display, why not use the opportunity to showcase your credentials, as “Fortune All-Star Analyst” Mike Mayo does here?


Or, for those who would prefer not to defile their bond with garish self-promotion, something a little more subtle. Show potential investors what they have to look forward to if they invest with you and Jazz. Like a nice little place on the water.


…or perhaps a private island, perfect for alone time, just the two of you.


Or maybe drop the pretense and get personal.


REALLY personal. Say, “Screw it– it’s Valentine’s Day and this is the real me, with my dogs, and we love each other in a way you can’t possibly imagine.** Unashamed and unmuzzled. Bitch on bitch. And if anyone is wearing a dog collar, it’s me.”

An Executive’s Best Friend [Fortune]

**Though if you’ve seen Marley In Me you get the idea.

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46 Responses to “Presenting: Executive Bitches”

  1. VonSloneker says:

    Might be NSFW…but sure, I'll submit some pics

    – D. Kneale

    • Enquiring Minds says:

      Before or after furiously clicking through all the slides?

    • W. Houston says:

      Might be NSFW? Yea, and I might have died from natural causes.

      • Elliot Rosewater says:

        We can expect new things from Whitney (she made a stunning gift to the 1988 Olympics with the ballad "One Moment in Time") but even if we didn't, she would remain the most exciting and orignal black jazz artist of her generation.

        • VonSloneker says:

          What about…never mind, you're probably right.*

          – Kenny G.

          * I'd quibble with her categorization as a jazz artist. More soul/pop/gospel…stretch to include R&B. Steely Dan has more jazz cred than, rest her soul, Whitney

    • pazzo83 says:

      Just send'em on over, we'll make sure they get forwarded on…

      – Farmer, Altoona, Pennsylvania

  2. bluehorseshoe says:

    I hear ya Bess, I've watched 'Marley In Me' a few times while i was supposed to be working.

    -SEC analyst

  3. Guest says:

    The Sperry Top-Siders say, "I'm a prep school kid at heart," being alone with your puppy on a hammock says, "83 was like my biggest summer for pussy."

  4. inlovewithpmco says:

    Off topic but happy Valentines Day PMCO

  5. Marley IN Me? Different than what I'm used to, but I'll bite.

    -Gundlach

    P.S. – I had no idea Mayo lives on UWS…

  6. 2_Small_2_Bail says:

    Mayo…I fucked your bitch.

    -Kneale

  7. pazzo83 says:

    This is fuckin bullshit.

    – Wilbur F.

  8. Where's Matt? says:

    Any word on how choice in dog breed impacted share performance for the ones who were CEOs of public companies?

  9. Self Cracker Upper says:

    I heard Branson took his dog to a Flea Circus and he stole the show!

  10. Knealeclops says:

    Good news is that the Westminster's TRO against me runs out this year. Bad news, my cut rate insurance does not cover gray market Cialis.

  11. early_hominid says:

    Seamless segue from the Bloomberg-Gaga picture. Nicely done.

  12. Archie says:

    He got a varsity jacket for that? Really?

  13. Harris-Tweed says:

    No Golden Retrievers? What's next? Skinny jeans with crocodile loafers?

  14. Guest says:

    Bottom picture, left to right: no, no, yes.

    – weimaraner furiously examining motives

  15. Snoop Dogg says:

    Fo Shizzle my nizzle

  16. Drogba says:

    Pls post the pics of Branson kiteboarding with the British Chiquita…….pretty pls?

  17. Guest says:

    Great pic of Branson's self acclaimed game "Find the Peanut Butter"

  18. R. Jeremy says:

    Heyyyy, I'm great at doggystyle

  19. guest says:

    That last caption = coke spit out all over my monitor.

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