I will sell this house today

Sleep Where Vikram Pandit Hath Slept

Bloomberg reports that Uncle Vik has put his 6-bedroom, 6-bath Greenwich, CT weekend house on the market and while experts are skeptical he’ll get the $4.3 million asking price, perhaps someone will consider throwing him a bone. Citi shareholders have screwed him yet again and he could use the cash. No zen garden to speak of (cruel world) but there are “rolling grounds” and a lagoon-like pool. Make him an offer.

(hidden for your protection)
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52 Responses to “Sleep Where Vikram Pandit Hath Slept”

  1. Squatter says:

    Occupy Pandit's house

  2. Guest says:

    Why hasn't he been foreclosed on? How can he live there and only make $1 a year!

    – Outraged OWS Comp Quant

  3. Al Czervik says:

    Do I make the check out to him or Al-Waleed?

  4. gab says:

    Is that a two-car garage?

  5. inlovewithpmco says:

    Forget Pandit, I want to sleep where PMCO sleeps

  6. dumb says:

    6-bedroom, 6-bath Greenwich, CT vacation house is slumming it…

  7. Vineyard Snob says:

    What kind of a douche has a "vacation house" in Greenwich.

  8. guest says:

    It is not a vacation home if it is where successful people normally live. Instead, a vacation home is where the native demographic is significantly poorer than these so called "vacationers," thus allowing for economic/social tension to emerge despite the fact that these peasants rely on these individuals for their annual income and these individuals rely on these peasants for labor/services.

    – Guy who is planning to write a book about it

    • guest says:

      Pandit's primary residence is in Manhattan. What would you suggest we call this place?

      • Movie Buff says:

        Pandit's Temple of Poon

      • guestaguest says:

        His weekend place.

      • getmeadrink says:

        You'll probably find the CT house is his "primary residence" which conveniently avoids City tax.

        • Julian Roberston says:

          Hey !

        • BessLevin says:

          "Pandit lists the Citigroup building at 399 Park Ave. in New York as his primary mailing address for all Greenwich tax bills and municipal correspondence, a sign that he doesn’t reside full time at the Connecticut home, according to the assessor’s office. Pandit also owns a co-operative apartment on Manhattan’s Upper West Side, which he bought from the estate of late actor Tony Randall in 2007 for $17.9 million, city property records show."

        • Dennis Kozlowski says:

          Umm, that doesn't always work out so well…

        • PermaGuestII says:

          No, it doesn't– not unless Pandit can prove that he spent >183 days last year without poking so much as one toe over the York State line, let alone into the Five Boroughs.

  9. HAM05 says:

    place reeks of chaat masala and tears

  10. Preston Hollow says:

    $4.3mm in Texas makes that a guest house on 5 acres, with a 12k sq/ft wife and a Lexis in the driveway.

    • PermaGuestII says:

      Lexis = Alexis Texas?

      • Joke Explainer says:

        It's an Above The Law joke about some dumbass who once made a similar claim with the same conflation, leading to hours of fun for commenters making jokes about the error and some hypothesizing that he confused the car brand with the legal search tool, Lexis Nexis. Commenters on the site have continued to find the joke funny for years. Bear this in mind next time you have to talk to anyone in legal.


        Funny Lawyers, the new world's thinnest book after "Jewish Sports Legends."

        -Not the joke briefer but a big fan of his work who wishes he had the time, and lack of ADD, to give this a longer explanation.

        • ReaganLaw says:

          So then he was referring to Alexis Texas?

          -Guy who is explaining the "Joke Explainer's" over explanation.

  11. Carl S. says:

    So is it a pool or a lagoon? Details are important.

    • getter of references says:

      Sale House Woman #4: The ad said this pool was lagoon-like. There's nothing lagoon-like about it, except for the bugs. There aren't even any plants out here!

      Carolyn Burnham: What do you call this? Is this not a plant? If you have a problem with my plants, I can always call my landscape architect! Solved!

    • Ty says:

      pond, pond would be good for you

  12. Sleeper says:

    That's a helluva big wife.

  13. guest says:

    Pandit? You can have my answer now, if you like. My final offer is this: nothing. Not even the fee for the gaming license, which I would appreciate if you would put up personally.

    -Someone who like to quote from the Godfather

  14. Seamus says:

    I hold down the fort while Vik is in the city.


  15. Guest says:

    Did someone say bunga bunga?

    – Silvio B.