50 Shades of Grey is the first book in a trilogy about the relationship between a recent college graduate, Anastasia Steele, and a “young business magnate,” Christian Grey, the former being employed as a sex slave of the latter, who has a room in his apartment called the “Red Room of Pain,” where his sadomasichistic directives go down. The books have been dubbed “mommy porn” and are apparently huge among married women over thirty who are using the “tantalizing tale to spice up their sex lives.” Naturally, the subject came up last night at a party attended by some billionaires and their wives.
Stephen Schwarzman [attended the event] with his wife, Christine Schwarzman, who said she’s just finished reading the novel “50 Shades of Grey,” which is “definitely not for Steve,” who likes the thriller writer Lee Child.
While the Blackstone CEO may be (allegedly) too good for billionaire BDSM tales, we assume most of his peers have found themselves unable to put the tomes down and don’t care who knows it. To that end, we’ve sent out detailed questionaires to top CEOs and hedge fund managers to find out how many other “out and proud” readers of the series there are among Wall Street’s elite. Apparently Jimmy Cayne went through the trilogy in “less than a week” and Carl Icahn, who keeps autographed copies proudly displayed on his office shelves, is dying for a fourth installment. No word from one J. Gundlach, though we’re expecting a moderately snippy note about how he “could’ve written the damn thing.”
Bill Cunningham on Borrowed Dresses, Charity Galas, Astor [Bloomberg]
Are you kidding, that crap was way too tame. We're getting ready to publish our own novel that will blow this out of the water.
I'm only interested if pmco read it.
PMCO, want to re enact as few chapters?
The logical take:
Women reading a book with that premise get the urge to play college girl and bang their husbands. Men reading that book get the urge to bang a college girl. Christine is wise to keep that book to herself.
Fifty shades of garbage, more like it….these quotes are from some blogger:
Someone needs to take this author’s thesaurus and hide it someplace safe.
“Anticipation hangs heavy and portentous over my head…”
“‘So I brought you here,” he said phlegmatically.
“The ceremony takes another hour to conclude. It’s interminable.”
“Another mercurial mood swing; it’s so hard to keep up.”
“I’m lost in a quagmire of sensation.”
“I revel in his possession, his lust slaking mine.”
“Trepidation lances through me.”
“He’s got right under my skin, literally.”
…and are apparently huge among married women over thirty who are using the “tantalizing tale to spice up their sex lives.”
- – - –
How do you get your wife to scream while you’re having sex? Call her and tell her.
BREAKING: authors of erotic fiction may not be gifted writers. Weird that you're so angry about it.
With a college graduate? Disgusting.
J. Epstein
What do women and condoms have in common? If they're not on your dick they're in your wallet.
you are little late to the pmco bandwagon
jealous would be more accurate.
"…enduring a penis the size of my husband's…" Mrs Schwartzman continued, "…even fantasy whips and chains are apt to evoke more feelings inside of me…"
Trolling for college pussy at 50 y/o is only successfully accomplished by three types of people: college professors, high fashion photographers, and Alec Baldwin
Sen. Joseph Biden: And she still didn't go out with you? [ Thomas nods no ] Now, Judge Thomas, there have been charges by Professor Hill that you talked casually with her about graphic scenes in porno movies. Is that true?
Judge Clarence Thomas: Yes, it is.
Sen. Joseph Biden: And.. did that work? Did it break the ice?
Judge Clarence Thomas: No, Senator, it actually offended her.
Sen. Howell Heflin: Uh.. what porno movie did you talk about?
Judge Clarence Thomas: Well.. I mainly spoke about a favorite of mine, called "The Hind-Lick Manuever".
Sen. Howell Heflin: That's a good movie, Judge! But do you think hard-core porno is the way to go? Because I feel women prefer softer porn.
Sen. Joseph Biden: Senator Thurmond?
Sen. Strom Thurmond: I agree with Senator Heflin. Yeah, that's right! The women like something with more stories and costumes, that'll transport 'em to another place and time. That's right! Women don't like close-ups of oversized genitalia! That's just never gonna turn 'em on!
Ever get a handy from a one armed man with a lobster claw? Want to?
Did you see how small his hands are?
I don't know what that meant and unfortunately it also failed to get me going.
Sue and Sally meet at their 30th class reunion, and they haven't seen each other since graduation. They begin to talk and bring each other up to date. The conversation covers their husbands, their children, homes, etc. and finally gets around to their sex lives.
Sue says, "It's OK. We get it on every week or so but it's no big adventure, how's yours?"
Sally replies "It's just great, ever since we got into S&M."
Sue is aghast. "Really Sally, I never would have guessed that you, being married to a rich and powerful hedge fund owner, …….that you would go for *…that….* ."
"Oh, sure," says Sally, "He snores while I masturbate."
Jazz hands > Lobster claw hands.
I hopped in a cab and said, "Take me to where the action is"
He took me to my house.
It's only fair to criticize it after phlegmatically masturbating in the middle stall.
"Apparently Jimmy Cayne went through the trilogy in 'less than a week'[.]"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKirIOe5_z8
Fags.
-Jimmy Cayne
and the 54th Gov of NY. Money talks..
You know how I know you're a man? This post is the first time you've heard about these books…
- I. Man
My wife and I like to smoke after sex. I'm on the same pack since 1978. She's up to three packs a day.
I had never heard of it before this post and chance of me reading it is zilch.
Or anyone with US citizenship at any University in Russia, Mexico, China, or any Eastern European country.
This shtick is getting old..
The Fetish Fair is cancelled too: http://www.thestar.com/news/article/1165265–will…
One time I went to a hotel. I asked the bellhop to handle my bag. He felt up my wife!
So that was you?!?!
-Guy in the Handicapped Stall Who Is Not Handicapped
I say to my wife, "How come you never scream out my name during sex?"
She says, "Because you're not around…."
I got home from work the other day and my wife met me at the door in a sheer negligee'. Trouble is, she was just getting home from work too!
Roman fingers……….
* has gotten *
I get phlegmatic, when I have a sinus infection.
Hey!
A E sir
"Envious" even more so.
I know it by heart and ghost wrote some chapters.
You're forgetting Kenny Powers.
I came home the other day and saw a man running stark naked down the street. I asked him, "Why are you running naked down the street?" He said, "Because you came home early."
hey I just met you,
and this is crazy,
but here's a riding crop
so whip me maybe.
-My Inner Goddess