• 02 May 2012 at 1:05 PM

Caption Contest Wednesday


[via WSJ]

264 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
Show all comments ↓

Comments (264)

  1. Posted by 2 cubes over | May 2, 2012 at 1:08 PM

    The WASP strikes back.

  2. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:12 PM

    Who carries a big stick now, Obama?

  3. Posted by dirty old man | May 2, 2012 at 1:14 PM

    Practicing paddling Becky's ass

  4. Posted by Lowly Assistant | May 2, 2012 at 1:14 PM

    Paddle for the cure!

  5. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:19 PM

    Fuck you China

  6. Posted by Jay_Carney | May 2, 2012 at 1:23 PM

    The size of his paddle illustrates the wealth disparity in the United States. Social mobility is impossible when the top 1% has paddles the size of pizza boxes and the rest of us have to use regulation 6.5 inch paddles, while chasing down drop shots with student loan ankle weights.

  7. Posted by guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:24 PM

    Winner!!!!……….

    of the most trite caption one could ever make.

  8. Posted by VonSloneker | May 2, 2012 at 1:17 PM

    Warren warming up for his grudge match vs. Greg Smith at the 2012 Maccabiah Games

  9. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:25 PM

    I believe its called Whiff Waff.

  10. Posted by Barry Badrinath | May 2, 2012 at 1:25 PM

    It wasn't the handle! I've been shitting pancakes ever since!

  11. Posted by Isn't it this? | May 2, 2012 at 1:27 PM

    As sure a thing as looking for pussy in a whorehouse.

  12. Posted by Byron Trott | May 2, 2012 at 1:29 PM

    Warren tries out the paddle that GS gave him in 2008.

  13. Posted by Cut Me | May 2, 2012 at 1:30 PM

    Fuck you Greg Smith!

  14. Posted by Cut Me | May 2, 2012 at 1:32 PM

    Wow! This one is big enough for me to use on Bartiromo

  15. Posted by Deleveraging | May 2, 2012 at 1:35 PM

    Let me tell you, getting this paddle past the rules committee was harder than getting the SEC to grant me a filing exception.

  16. Posted by motives | May 2, 2012 at 1:35 PM

    shoot me another one, Becky!

  17. Posted by guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:37 PM

    Somewhere, Barry Badrinath wakes up in a cold sweat.

  18. Posted by Number 1 | May 2, 2012 at 1:37 PM

    You have become a member of the ancient and noble society of Stonecutters, who since ancient times have always endeavored to shatter the stone of ignorance, to bring forth the light of truth… now, let's all get drunk and play Ping-Pong!

  19. Posted by gab | May 2, 2012 at 1:39 PM

    If you think this is big, you should see it when I get excited.

  20. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:40 PM

    Anyone else feel bad for the 10+ losers who felt the "event" of an old guy playing table tennis was picture worthy? Same can be said about all of the tools on Facebook who thinks anyone cares or enjoys the concert performance they captured on their iPhone.

  21. Posted by Buffeted | May 2, 2012 at 1:40 PM

    When Brian Moynihan bent over my desk and asked for my help this is the paddle I used to get preferred shares with a 6% divvy and warrants for more of that POS should it actually rise in value.

  22. Posted by Lou Mannheim | May 2, 2012 at 1:44 PM

    Practicing for the Old Crooks Home.

  23. Posted by Wall St. Dude | May 2, 2012 at 1:45 PM

    "cha.. YEAH, I've dabbled with Wonkavision in The Television Room and proceeded to play ping pong. What type of question is that?"

  24. Posted by Im_a_Dude | May 2, 2012 at 1:45 PM

    it was made special for his secretary who, incidentally, pays a much too high tax rate

  25. Posted by K Bacon | May 2, 2012 at 1:47 PM

    Thank you sir, may I have another

  26. Posted by Alt_EST | May 2, 2012 at 1:48 PM

    Bringing back a lot of memories.

    -S. Archer

  27. Posted by PermaGuestII | May 2, 2012 at 1:52 PM

    The subtitle of this blog is "A Wall Street Tabloid."

    We are commenting on a picture of an octogenarian billionaire in a suit (jacket buttoned, no less) swatting at a ping-pong ball with a paddle the size of a toilet seat, while standing before a crowd of onlookers in what appears to be the living room from the Brady Bunch.

    What profound, life-affirming, non-trite comment would you prefer he make?

  28. Posted by guest | May 2, 2012 at 1:53 PM

    This paddle clearly deserves a higher sales tax than regular paddles

  29. Posted by Oldjoke | May 2, 2012 at 1:54 PM

    "I never said I want a huge Tennis"

  30. Posted by guest | May 2, 2012 at 2:03 PM

    Humor isn't making the first and most obvious comment that pops into your head. There's a certain subtly involved in humor. Seeing a picture of a ping-pong playing Warren and making a comment about a ping-pong playing rabble-rouser from a month isn't genius. But I wouldn't expect you Americans to follow; after all, you made Adam Sandler one of the highest paid actors of all time and sell out Dane Cook shows.

  31. Posted by PermaGuestII | May 2, 2012 at 2:10 PM

    If you're not an American, you are mis-spelling "humour."

  32. Posted by Beerio | May 2, 2012 at 2:14 PM

    "The huge sums of Capital [Paddles] we currently manage eliminate any chance of exceptional performance [top spin]"

  33. Posted by Will Hunting | May 2, 2012 at 2:14 PM

    My father was an alcoholic. Mean fuckin' drunk. Used to come home hammered, looking to whale on someone. So I had to provoke him, so he wouldn't go after my mother and little brother. Interesting nights were when he wore his rings…
    Will: He used to just put a belt, a stick, and a big paddle on the kitchen table and say, "Choose."
    Sean: Well, I gotta go with the belt there.
    Will: I used to go with the big paddle.
    Sean: Why?
    Will: Cause fuck him, that' why.

  34. Posted by VonSloneker | May 2, 2012 at 2:15 PM

    The hell it isn't..

    - Benny Hill & Mr. Bean

    P.S. Welcome back comedy cop, we've missed you. Got bored of yelling at your kids for telling knock knock jokes?

  35. Posted by HAM05 | May 2, 2012 at 2:20 PM

    as a scatological connoisseur, i'd love to see these gargantuan toilets you frequent

  36. Posted by ahahah | May 2, 2012 at 2:20 PM

    Before I started training at Sitaris, I whiffed every time, but look at me now BABY! I even have a coach from Nebraska scouting me!

  37. Posted by Sizerator | May 2, 2012 at 2:22 PM

    Not quite big enough for Herrera, though.

  38. Posted by David Sokol | May 2, 2012 at 2:22 PM

    It was that, or resign…

  39. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 2:24 PM

    Mr. Lewis, is that you?

  40. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 2:32 PM

    "Lieutenant Dan got me invested in some kind of fruit company. So then I got a call from him, saying we don't have to worry about money no more. And I said, that's good… One less thing."

  41. Posted by Jiang'sDreams | May 2, 2012 at 2:36 PM

    Dr. Ping Jiang's prostate screening room

  42. Posted by HedgeHog | May 2, 2012 at 2:42 PM

    You don't need big balls to invest, instead you need a pig paddle

  43. Posted by guest | May 2, 2012 at 2:45 PM

    Who said I wasn't American?

  44. Posted by JimmyG | May 2, 2012 at 2:46 PM

    *subtlety* not *subtly* involved in humor.

    now stand still while i put this in your neck you ignorant wretch.

    - pen knife in darien

  45. Posted by The Oracle | May 2, 2012 at 2:53 PM

    "Is it just me or are my balls getting smaller?"

  46. Posted by BS MD | May 2, 2012 at 3:03 PM

    Big Swinging Stick

  47. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 3:05 PM

    Smells like burning diapers covered with sprinkles.

  48. Posted by BabyCrane | May 2, 2012 at 3:14 PM

    Penis envy.

  49. Posted by guestapo | May 2, 2012 at 3:24 PM

    Actually, the word "tabloid" doesn't seem to appear on the page, which is probably a good thing because it's a reductionist/misleading description of the site. Fact is, there are few similarities between this place and, say, the Post, which is an actual tabloid. DB is a lot closer to a cross between Bloomberg and The Daily Show.

    Just my two cents.

    As for the debate, not really sure what was wrong with VonSloneker's caption. Also, guest above can fuck off.

  50. Posted by motives | May 2, 2012 at 3:33 PM

    this isn't google

  51. Posted by Puck It | May 2, 2012 at 3:44 PM

    Charlie prefers the backhand.

  52. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 3:47 PM

    Paging joke briefer.

  53. Posted by T-Bone | May 2, 2012 at 3:47 PM

    You could even hit the cube with a giant fucking paddle and it will still be a cube

  54. Posted by PermaGuestII | May 2, 2012 at 4:16 PM

    "But I wouldn't expect you Americans to follow"

  55. Posted by Lord Humongous | May 2, 2012 at 4:22 PM

    take a lap

  56. Posted by Lord Humongous | May 2, 2012 at 4:25 PM

    take a lap if you never heard of imdb.com

  57. Posted by Margin of Safety | May 2, 2012 at 5:10 PM

    When you build a bridge that can hold 30,000 pound trucks, you only drive 10,000 pound trucks across it. The same goes for ping pong paddles.

  58. Posted by Eric | May 2, 2012 at 5:12 PM

    He always gets sweetheart deals

  59. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 5:47 PM

    The crowd expected Buffett to be much larger in person.

  60. Posted by Reinholt | May 2, 2012 at 6:36 PM

    "You can fondle the paddle, but it will not respond."

  61. Posted by Guest | May 2, 2012 at 8:36 PM

    I was in Thailand playing ping-pong in Ding-Dang. A high stakes game in some opium den

  62. Posted by Darkstar | May 2, 2012 at 8:44 PM

    A joke isnt funny unless someone is arrested or offended.

    guest – fuck you.

  63. Posted by lolwut | May 2, 2012 at 9:51 PM

    I must say thats the worst reputation score I've ever seen.

    Anywhere.

  64. Posted by lolwut | May 2, 2012 at 9:56 PM

    Because when the sheer fact of you investing in something makes the stock price go up, what else do you do with your time?

  65. Posted by Landfill | May 3, 2012 at 10:37 AM

    Where the hell is ding dang?

  66. Posted by Galen Gadley | May 9, 2012 at 11:25 PM

    Agreed Shawn. That tutorial is definitely more a proof of concept. Now if you could do it with a peely sticker… I keed. I keed.

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