• 14 Jun 2012 at 1:28 PM

Bernie Madoff Is Still The King

Though it looked like Sir Allen Stanford might dethrone him with a recommended sentence of 230 years…

…the Ponz Master held onto the record for time behind bars for a Ponzi scheme when SAS was given 110 years, to Berns’ 150. Let this be a warning to you all– step into his den at your own risk.

132 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (132)

  1. Posted by guest | June 14, 2012 at 1:32 PM


  2. Posted by BetterRed | June 14, 2012 at 1:41 PM

    110 years and no more laptime from hot blond chicks? My life is over.

  3. Posted by Danker_Banker | June 14, 2012 at 1:42 PM

    Dang! I knew I should have done that college speaking tour.


  4. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 1:48 PM

    I wonder what it is like to be punched in the face everyday.

    -Muttontown Lax Bro

  5. Posted by BetterRed | June 14, 2012 at 1:50 PM

    There should have been a 'call the sentence' thread.

  6. Posted by The 1% | June 14, 2012 at 1:55 PM

    At least he didn't get life

  7. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 1:56 PM

    I noticed it.

  8. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 1:56 PM

    I'm just sayin' you can do better.

    -Chris Brown**
    -Thomas M. Smith*

    *Attempting to invoke the services of the Joke Briefer
    ** Trying to be like Matt and have a double-asterisk

  9. Posted by Abe_Froman_ | June 14, 2012 at 1:58 PM

    With good behavior and time served, he could be out in 60

  10. Posted by yoyomama | June 14, 2012 at 1:58 PM

    ugh, that pic reminds me of just how attractive a big chunk of jewish guys are…

  11. Posted by guest | June 14, 2012 at 1:59 PM


  12. Posted by guest | June 14, 2012 at 1:59 PM

    No one, myself included, knows what this comment. Well done.

  13. Posted by guest | June 14, 2012 at 2:00 PM

    ^^^ carsten kengeter?

  14. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 2:02 PM

    We should really execute people who will be in jail for the remainder of their natural life. Seriously I see no reason why anyone should pay (via taxes) for people to just sit in a cell and consume resources. This case is a bad example but as a general rule this should apply.

    Sorry for the rather negative comment

  15. Posted by BetterRed | June 14, 2012 at 2:04 PM

    Thank god for time served. More like 57.

  16. Posted by Danker_Banker | June 14, 2012 at 2:05 PM

    Not as sorry as we are

  17. Posted by briefer wannabe | June 14, 2012 at 2:13 PM

    I got it!

    It was while serving as an Assistant District Attorney that Smith prosecuted Dudley Wayne Kyzer for a brutal triple homicide. Smith was successful in the prosecution and eventually asked the court to impose a 10,000 year sentence in addition to two consecutive life sentences

  18. Posted by Incitatus | June 14, 2012 at 2:14 PM

    With the innumerable appeals and such before finally deep-sixing somebody (all the while paying for his room and board), I'd wager that the cost is probably closer to breakeven than you'd think.

    And never apologize.

  19. Posted by Incitatus | June 14, 2012 at 2:15 PM

    I have a huge problem with this headline.
    -Bob Wills

  20. Posted by Deleveraging | June 14, 2012 at 2:34 PM

    It's always cheaper to keep them alive. The appeals process is expensive and the State always gets stuck with the legal bills from both sides. If it was up to me, I would require the states to intentionally overcrowd prison populations. After a few days, they start fighting like Simease Fighting Fish and ideally kill each other.

    Trivia: An African American male that drops out of high school has an 80% chance of being involved in an incident where a gun is present by age 30.

  21. Posted by one | June 14, 2012 at 2:37 PM

    Hey, can I play this game?

    – J. Corzine

  22. Posted by Laxbro | June 14, 2012 at 2:41 PM

    Examine your motives, chief.

  23. Posted by Sump pump | June 14, 2012 at 2:41 PM

    I forgot how handsome he really is. Now that is the real deal.

  24. Posted by beastie | June 14, 2012 at 2:44 PM

    the King Madoff, that is my name
    and I know the fly spot where they got the champagne

  25. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 2:45 PM

    Hey, it's not rape if you consent to it !

    -A Stanford

  26. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 2:53 PM

    I bet he has a humongous bush.

  27. Posted by Running Wolf | June 14, 2012 at 2:55 PM

    Examine yours…

  28. Posted by Chief Exam Officer | June 14, 2012 at 2:56 PM

    The way I see it: People who drop out of high school –> lower income –> higher propensity for redneck activity –> hunting/shooting range –> gun present at young age.

    -Motives examined.

  29. Posted by Grinders | June 14, 2012 at 2:59 PM

    I find your comment appalling and I won’t tolerate it.
    No person should be allowed to talk in that manner.

  30. Posted by Ross | June 14, 2012 at 3:10 PM


    Prison should arrange an 'accident'.

  31. Posted by Director | June 14, 2012 at 3:17 PM

    Obsess much ?

  32. Posted by Tom Hobbes | June 14, 2012 at 3:50 PM

    College spanking tour…

  33. Posted by Guest | June 14, 2012 at 3:51 PM


    –Joffrey "Da King" Baratheon

  34. Posted by PermaGuestII | June 14, 2012 at 5:03 PM

    Why whatever do you mean?

    -Capt. L. Renault
    Gendarmerie National

  35. Posted by Guest | June 15, 2012 at 9:07 AM

    What about guys who flunked out of Yale twice… I mean, say such a person existed, what would the odds of them being in an "incident" with a firearm? Theoretically speaking, of course.

    -Dick Cheney

  36. Posted by PepeLePuke | June 15, 2012 at 10:12 AM

    Gendarmerie NationalE – other than that no concerns

  37. Posted by Madoff's Swag Shirt | June 15, 2012 at 11:21 AM

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  38. Posted by alucard | June 15, 2012 at 8:29 PM

    madoff certaintly has his og credentials with 120 year sentence. lol

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