In full:

“Thank you Mr. Chairman. There are a couple of important events coming up that I want to share with you today. First, tonight the All-Star game will be played. Also, in just 11 days, we’ll have the two-year anniversary of the signing of the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act. Now, some of you are asking, “How’s he going to put these two totally divergent things together?” It’ll all make sense in a minute. Really.

First, how many of you have heard of Bryce Harper? He’s the youngest position player ever chosen for an All Star game and plays for what is for many of you, your hometown team, the Washington Nats. He not only has a way with the bat but he seems to have a way with words, too. A couple weeks ago, a reporter asked him what he seemed to think was a silly question, and he responded by saying, “That’s a clown question, bro.” That answer went on T-shirts. It went on late-night TV. It went viral.

Now, back to Dodd-Frank. There are those who say we don’t need it. Let’s repeal it—or at least parts of it. Let’s de-fund the agencies overseeing it so they can’t enforce it. Heck, let’s just take ‘em to court if we don’t like the line-up. Let’s take our bat and ball and go home. So, here’s the question they seem to be asking: “Do we even need Dodd-Frank?”

Let’s not even talk about 2008 and the financial collapse and the real reason Dodd-Frank came along in the first place. Let’s talk about how MF Global (as some would suggest) got caught trying to steal. Let’s talk about JPMorgan’s losing streak. Let’s talk about Barclays’ balk. Do we need Dodd-Frank? That’s a clown question, bro.

So yes, we need rules. We need the funding to enforce them. Plenty of folks still seem to think they can get around the rules. Plenty of folks in this town seem to think we don’t need umpires. Do we? That’s a clown question, bro.”

That’s A Clown Question, Bro [CFTC]

110 comments (hidden for your protection)
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Comments (110)

  1. Posted by Alt_EST | July 11, 2012 at 2:55 PM

    Is the villain from Die Hard the CFTC commissioner? That's a clown question, bro.

  2. Posted by guest | July 11, 2012 at 2:58 PM

    John McClane could sort this out no problem!

  3. Posted by Dow30Thou | July 11, 2012 at 3:01 PM

    How many of us do you think we can fit in this car? Thats a clown question, bro.

  4. Posted by Hey Zeus! | July 11, 2012 at 3:03 PM

    If a minority side kick is needed, you know where to find me.

  5. Posted by Sting | July 11, 2012 at 3:04 PM

    Nice hair, old chap

  6. Posted by Shift+F9 | July 11, 2012 at 3:06 PM

    Do these shoes make my feet look big?

  7. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2012 at 3:08 PM

    Mr Schaeffer is still ticked off he lost his BMW dealer license. Selling Kias is not the NKI.

  8. Posted by the commish | July 11, 2012 at 3:10 PM

    Don't call me chap, bro

  9. Posted by _guest | July 11, 2012 at 3:17 PM

    How's things working out for you these days?

    -Messrs Sarbanes & Oxley

  10. Posted by Backdoor_Bess | July 11, 2012 at 3:22 PM

    Ric Flair is now working in out biz? Nice.

  11. Posted by Fuckin hell | July 11, 2012 at 3:22 PM

    No one escapes from Schaeffer plantation!

  12. Posted by Ghostbusters | July 11, 2012 at 3:28 PM

    What's Vigo got to do with this?
    -Peter Venkman

  13. Posted by Lowly Assistant | July 11, 2012 at 3:32 PM

    "Wouldn't it be funny if that Chairman got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped him…"

    -Bart "Cryptkeeper Hair" Chilton

  14. Posted by oblivious | July 11, 2012 at 3:34 PM

    i don't get it…

  15. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2012 at 3:35 PM

    He looks like the Highlander

  16. Posted by L. Tilton | July 11, 2012 at 3:36 PM

    No idea if this is a joke from somewhere but please, do go on…

  17. Posted by Im_a_Dude | July 11, 2012 at 3:38 PM

    "Let’s talk about how MF Global (as some would suggest) got caught trying to steal"

    This birdbrain must have been too busy working on his tan, and doesn't even realize that the CFTC was asleep at the wheel and missed the entire MF episode.

  18. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2012 at 3:40 PM

    …annnd PFG

  19. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2012 at 3:46 PM

    http://www.cnn.com/2012/07/11/showbiz/daniel-tosh

    Paragraphs 4-6

    Not L.A. but a fan of his work

  20. Posted by Im_a_Dude | July 11, 2012 at 3:47 PM

    doesn't sound like he's been notified of PFG yet.

  21. Posted by Previously Confused | July 11, 2012 at 3:49 PM

    Thanks.

    -Not L. Tilton, nor a fan of her work, but a guest who was previously confused and is now pleasantly amused.

  22. Posted by Bandersnatch | July 11, 2012 at 3:52 PM

    tried a suicide squeeze?

  23. Posted by HAM05 | July 11, 2012 at 3:54 PM

    impossible as there can be only one

  24. Posted by B2b MD | July 11, 2012 at 3:56 PM

    laxbro>clown bro

  25. Posted by Unreformed Frat Boy | July 11, 2012 at 3:58 PM

    Laxbro > Clown Bro > Bart Chilton > UBS Janitorial Services Quant > N'08

  26. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2012 at 4:02 PM

    Joe Dirt wants his hair back.

  27. Posted by Ghostbusters | July 11, 2012 at 4:06 PM
  28. Posted by Hans, Bubby | July 11, 2012 at 4:08 PM

    Babe I negotiate multi-million dollar deals for breafast, I can handle this Eurotrash.

  29. Posted by MHA | July 11, 2012 at 4:10 PM

    That's a clown hairdo, bro.

  30. Posted by Guest | July 11, 2012 at 4:13 PM

    I just flew in from Pittsburgh. And boy is my hair tired.

  31. Posted by Edmond_Dantes | July 11, 2012 at 4:17 PM

    Haannnnnnns!!!!

  32. Posted by nerd guest | July 11, 2012 at 4:17 PM

    Happy to see that Thor's dad got a new gig… Demigod > CFTC Commissioner > ??? > Profit

  33. Posted by güest | July 11, 2012 at 4:25 PM

    You need more whiteness, bro

    - Bart Assange

  34. Posted by Comic Book Guy | July 11, 2012 at 4:26 PM

    Actually, we need to speak to him and his son about some insider trading in shares of Stark Industries.

    Nick Fury, SEC

  35. Posted by Guestay | July 11, 2012 at 4:39 PM

    Bryce Harper Skullet > Bart Chilton Asian Mullet

  36. Posted by Grinders | July 11, 2012 at 5:05 PM

    Are we just gonna sit here and let this weirdo change 200 years of playground precedence. Everybody knows you take your bat and your *glove* and go home. You leave the ball. I assume.

  37. Posted by VonSloneker | July 11, 2012 at 5:08 PM

    The jokes need work…handsome devil though.

    - Dawber from "Coach", Greg Norman, and the guy who will someday play Gary Busey in his biopic

  38. Posted by Mexi_Cant | July 11, 2012 at 5:34 PM

    Barney Frank finding out his HIV Test Results

    Dr Goldstein: Mr. Frank, how many lovers have you had? Because you will need to notify them all by law.

    Barney: That's a clown question, bwo.

  39. Posted by Texashedge | July 11, 2012 at 5:53 PM

    http://deadspin.com/5918085/bryce-harper-to-pryin

    Ziggy at Complaint Dept:

    "The New Yorker is stealing my ideas"

  40. Posted by Tommy De Vito | July 11, 2012 at 6:22 PM

    You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little f*ckd up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to f*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

    Good Fellas will rise again

  41. Posted by Matt's Bro | July 11, 2012 at 6:32 PM

    6:30 and no Write Offs? Is there one more Matt post on the way? With big words, and charts and graphs?

    ML: That's a clown question, bro*

    *This doesn't necessarily mean you're my bro, or that we're splitting this pitcher of margs.

  42. Posted by Guestard | July 11, 2012 at 6:56 PM

    Do you honestly believe that your father had nothing to do with that tiger mauling Roy?

    TACQB

  43. Posted by Chico | July 11, 2012 at 7:59 PM

    Don't call me bro, amigo.

  44. Posted by Chilton Manual | July 11, 2012 at 8:02 PM

    He looks like a Toyota? I don't see it.

  45. Posted by Pierre | July 12, 2012 at 5:06 AM

    Don't call me amigo, mon ami

  46. Posted by timmeh | July 12, 2012 at 8:18 AM

    Facial Features:Forehead length:Mullet

    1:1:2

    not such a good look mate..

  47. Posted by Long Duck Dong | July 12, 2012 at 10:07 AM

    And don't call me ami, my peng you (朋友).

  48. Posted by Jesus | July 12, 2012 at 10:19 AM

    Do I look Puerto Rican to you?

  49. Posted by oblivious | July 12, 2012 at 11:00 AM

    thx

  50. Posted by Guestavo | July 12, 2012 at 11:37 AM

    Don't make it bad

    -J Lenin

  51. Posted by Guestavo | July 12, 2012 at 11:40 AM

    Wtf?

    -Raiden

  52. Posted by roche foucault | July 12, 2012 at 1:14 PM

    nicht call me freund ah hell i don't speak german

  53. Posted by contango | July 12, 2012 at 1:39 PM

    That depends, DIII laxbro's are kind of like a circus act.

    - DI laxer wishing my skills amounted to something

  54. Posted by Tommy | August 14, 2012 at 1:24 PM

    Chilton is the man,had a wonderful dinner at his home last week.

    Also, I think the hair is a good change from the rest of the politicians.

    Why don't you guys get a political job so we can ride your case?
    All the help you guys are giving is overwhelming.

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