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CFTC Commissioner Bart Chilton Uses Public Meeting On Dodd/Frank Rulemaking To Test Out Open Mic Night Bits

In full:

“Thank you Mr. Chairman. There are a couple of important events coming up that I want to share with you today. First, tonight the All-Star game will be played. Also, in just 11 days, we’ll have the two-year anniversary of the signing of the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act. Now, some of you are asking, “How’s he going to put these two totally divergent things together?” It’ll all make sense in a minute. Really.

First, how many of you have heard of Bryce Harper? He’s the youngest position player ever chosen for an All Star game and plays for what is for many of you, your hometown team, the Washington Nats. He not only has a way with the bat but he seems to have a way with words, too. A couple weeks ago, a reporter asked him what he seemed to think was a silly question, and he responded by saying, “That’s a clown question, bro.” That answer went on T-shirts. It went on late-night TV. It went viral.

Now, back to Dodd-Frank. There are those who say we don’t need it. Let’s repeal it—or at least parts of it. Let’s de-fund the agencies overseeing it so they can’t enforce it. Heck, let’s just take ‘em to court if we don’t like the line-up. Let’s take our bat and ball and go home. So, here’s the question they seem to be asking: “Do we even need Dodd-Frank?”

Let’s not even talk about 2008 and the financial collapse and the real reason Dodd-Frank came along in the first place. Let’s talk about how MF Global (as some would suggest) got caught trying to steal. Let’s talk about JPMorgan’s losing streak. Let’s talk about Barclays’ balk. Do we need Dodd-Frank? That’s a clown question, bro.

So yes, we need rules. We need the funding to enforce them. Plenty of folks still seem to think they can get around the rules. Plenty of folks in this town seem to think we don’t need umpires. Do we? That’s a clown question, bro.”

That’s A Clown Question, Bro [CFTC]

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111 Responses to “CFTC Commissioner Bart Chilton Uses Public Meeting On Dodd/Frank Rulemaking To Test Out Open Mic Night Bits”

  1. Alt_EST says:

    Is the villain from Die Hard the CFTC commissioner? That's a clown question, bro.

  2. guest says:

    John McClane could sort this out no problem!

  3. Dow30Thou says:

    How many of us do you think we can fit in this car? Thats a clown question, bro.

  4. Sting says:

    Nice hair, old chap

  5. Guest says:

    Mr Schaeffer is still ticked off he lost his BMW dealer license. Selling Kias is not the NKI.

  6. _guest says:

    How's things working out for you these days?

    -Messrs Sarbanes & Oxley

  7. Backdoor_Bess says:

    Ric Flair is now working in out biz? Nice.

  8. Ghostbusters says:

    What's Vigo got to do with this?
    -Peter Venkman

  9. Lowly Assistant says:

    "Wouldn't it be funny if that Chairman got raped by like, 5 guys right now? Like right now? What if a bunch of guys just raped him…"

    -Bart "Cryptkeeper Hair" Chilton

  10. Guest says:

    He looks like the Highlander

  11. Im_a_Dude says:

    "Let’s talk about how MF Global (as some would suggest) got caught trying to steal"

    This birdbrain must have been too busy working on his tan, and doesn't even realize that the CFTC was asleep at the wheel and missed the entire MF episode.

  12. B2b MD says:

    laxbro>clown bro

    • Unreformed Frat Boy says:

      Laxbro > Clown Bro > Bart Chilton > UBS Janitorial Services Quant > N'08

      • contango says:

        That depends, DIII laxbro's are kind of like a circus act.

        – DI laxer wishing my skills amounted to something

  13. Guest says:

    Joe Dirt wants his hair back.

  14. MHA says:

    That's a clown hairdo, bro.

  15. Guest says:

    I just flew in from Pittsburgh. And boy is my hair tired.

  16. nerd guest says:

    Happy to see that Thor's dad got a new gig… Demigod > CFTC Commissioner > ??? > Profit

    • Comic Book Guy says:

      Actually, we need to speak to him and his son about some insider trading in shares of Stark Industries.

      Nick Fury, SEC

  17. güest says:

    You need more whiteness, bro

    – Bart Assange

  18. Guestay says:

    Bryce Harper Skullet > Bart Chilton Asian Mullet

  19. Grinders says:

    Are we just gonna sit here and let this weirdo change 200 years of playground precedence. Everybody knows you take your bat and your *glove* and go home. You leave the ball. I assume.

  20. VonSloneker says:

    The jokes need work…handsome devil though.

    – Dawber from "Coach", Greg Norman, and the guy who will someday play Gary Busey in his biopic

  21. Mexi_Cant says:

    Barney Frank finding out his HIV Test Results

    Dr Goldstein: Mr. Frank, how many lovers have you had? Because you will need to notify them all by law.

    Barney: That's a clown question, bwo.

  22. Tommy De Vito says:

    You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little f*ckd up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to f*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

    Good Fellas will rise again

  23. Matt's Bro says:

    6:30 and no Write Offs? Is there one more Matt post on the way? With big words, and charts and graphs?

    ML: That's a clown question, bro*

    *This doesn't necessarily mean you're my bro, or that we're splitting this pitcher of margs.

  24. Guestard says:

    Do you honestly believe that your father had nothing to do with that tiger mauling Roy?

    TACQB

  25. timmeh says:

    Facial Features:Forehead length:Mullet

    1:1:2

    not such a good look mate..

  26. Guestavo says:

    Wtf?

    -Raiden

  27. Tommy says:

    Chilton is the man,had a wonderful dinner at his home last week.

    Also, I think the hair is a good change from the rest of the politicians.

    Why don't you guys get a political job so we can ride your case?
    All the help you guys are giving is overwhelming.

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