Hedge Funds

Raj Rajaratnam Basically Has Washboard Abs Now, Says Completely Objective Third Party

Back in December, things were not going so well for hedge fund manager Raj Rajaratnam. For starters, he had just reported to prison to serve an eleven year sentence for insider trading, where there would be no April Fool’s day midgets or employees to tase or extra mayo to eat. Then there was the matter of the “unique constellation of ailments ravaging his body,” and the kidney transplant he was said to need. Finally, and not that there’s anything wrong with this, but if you’re a person who thinks looks matter, he was quite fat. It would have been enough to send Raj into an understandable tailspin of sorrow and despair. And yet? It turns out the Galleon founder is not only doing great but looks good too. How good? While we have no photographic evidence, consider that an attorney not related to or paid by the guy, ostensibly speaking to Bloomberg about a story involving Raj declining to answer questions about a tax shelter case, could not help but steer the conversation to Big R’s new body.

Rajaratnam, convicted last year of directing the largest hedge fund insider-trading scheme in U.S. history, was interviewed yesterday for about an hour and 45 minutes at the Federal Medical Center Devens in Ayers, Massachusetts. The deposition stems from a case involving a tax shelter Rajaratnam had invested in. He isn’t a defendant in the lawsuit. He refused to answer any of the more than 100 questions he was asked, invoking his right against self-incrimination under the U.S. Constitution’s Fifth Amendment, said Howard Kleinhendler, an attorney representing the plaintiffs. “He looked good,” Kleinhendler, of Wachtel Masyr & Missry LLP in New York, said today in a phone interview, adding that Rajaratnam appeared to have lost weight since the last time he saw him, in 2007. Rajaratnam, 55, has said in court papers that he has health problems including diabetes and will probably need dialysis and a kidney transplant. “He was in good spirits,” Kleinhendler said.

I know you asked me about the case but you should see how many fucking sit-ups this guy can do! Jesus!

Rajaratnam Silent In Tax-Shelter Deposition, Lawyer Says [Bloomberg]

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176 Responses to “Raj Rajaratnam Basically Has Washboard Abs Now, Says Completely Objective Third Party”

  1. Jimmy says:

    ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THIS IS… BOOYAH SKEE-DADDY!!!!

    LOVE,
    CRAMER

  2. The Kravis says:

    More like washboard slabs.

  3. Guy with A.D.D. says:

    Do Indian washboards look different then the ones we have here?

    -Guy who is very skeptical

    • Danker_Banker says:

      Not sure Raj would know either since he's Sri Lankan.

    • guest says:

      Honestly can't tell what the joke is here beyond thinking it's funny that Raj is from another country. Perhaps the Joke Briefer can shed some light.

      • Guest says:

        You really need some hand holding don't you…the guy is skeptical that Raj would ever have a six pack, and wondered if, somehow, Indian(Sri Lankan) washboards looked different enough (ROUND) to actually make the comparison apt.

        'Tard.

    • Guest says:

      Washboard?!? What the fuck is this, 1890?

      -GE Spin Cycle Quant

  4. ILoveLamp says:

    I wonder if he'll still be able to see his feet after he eats fifty hard-boiled eggs, or don't they do that any more?

  5. guest says:

    "i know you asked me about this case but you should see how many fucking sit-ups this guy can do" tag FTW.

  6. Guest says:

    “He looked good,”

    Kleinhendler looks like this FYI – http://www.wmllp.com/Attorneys/Howard-Kleinhendle

  7. B2b MD says:

    The weight loss always seems to coincide with a new love interest.

    -guy who keeps to straight and narrow after seeing certain parts of Shawshank.

  8. _guest says:

    He refused to answer any of the more than 100 questions he was asked, invoking his right against self-incrimination under the U.S. Constitution’s Fifth Amendment, said Howard Kleinhendler, an attorney representing the plaintiffs.

    "What kind of man talks to the plaintiff's attorney? No man. No man at all. A crippled little rata. What a reputation to leave behind. Is that how you want to be remembered?"

  9. Deleveraging says:

    I don't know why, but that picture of Raj always makes me smile.

  10. Gym says:

    Must be from chiseling all those arrowheads.

    -UBS Ethnicity Quant

  11. Gdawg says:

    All this news of insider trading makes me sad that I don't get such lucrative insider trading opportunities.

    The only insider trading I get is from the Bonobos VP of marketing an hour prior to launching their 50% off sale so I get to find the shorts I want and hit F5 until the sale is on.

  12. anonymous says:

    Ayer, MA not "Ayers"

  13. EQ in Dallas says:

    Jesus, where is the back row crowd today?

  14. roger says:

    Raj "Bring it on bai beeeeeeee" Rajaratnam

  15. leeminbrahs says:

    The only exercise he should worry about is Kegels. Hopefully, it will tighten his gapping butt hole from dropping the soap.

    Just my two cents.

    -J.Michaels

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