• 10 Jan 2013 at 4:35 PM

Feminine Touch Improves Hedge Fund Returns, According to Data Point

By Jon Shazar

There is an inverse relationship between penis size and hedge fund performance, one study of a nine-month period shows.

The Rothstein Kass Women in Alternatives Hedge Index produced a year-to-date net return through September of 8.95%, compared to the HFRX Global Hedge Fund Index, which was up 2.69% through September. Furthermore, over a five-year period, the Rothstein Kass WAI Hedge Index outperformed both the HFRX Global Hedge Fund Index and the S&P 500.

This does not surprise battler of the sexes, Rothstein Kass director Meredith Jones:

There have been a number of studies that show women investors to be more risk averse, and therefore potentially better able to escape market downturns and volatility. The outperformance by women-owned or managed hedge funds should make the case that investing in these types of funds is a smart business decision, rather than one that just feels good.

For those of you feeling threatened feel free to defend your honor and ability to produce risk-adjusted returns.

Hedge Funds Helmed By Women Outperform [FINalternatives]
Returns at Hedge Funds Run by Women Beat the Industry, Report Says [DealBook]
Lady Hedge Fund Managers Are Killing It [Jezebel]
Here is where I hoped to put a link to the actual study. Instead, this is a link to Rothstein Kass’ currently unavailable Web site [broken link]

Comments (21)

  1. 1
    Posted by guest | January 10, 2013 at 5:38 PM

    based on n=3?

  2. 2
    Posted by hmm | January 10, 2013 at 4:39 PM

    Perhaps unsurprisingly, the same inverse relationship does not hold when applied to article length.

  3. 3
    Posted by Goost | January 10, 2013 at 4:39 PM

    Inverted penises? 9 month period? Tell me more…

    - L. Tilton

  4. 4
    Posted by guest | January 10, 2013 at 4:54 PM

    if a similar study had shown outperformance by male run hedge funds, it would just have been because men are unfairly keeping women from achieving top positions at top hedge funds

  5. 5
    Posted by Short Shazar Quant | January 10, 2013 at 5:09 PM

    Then why don't you go run some money instead of copying and pasting random musings from the press here, I'm sure your chihuahua will be welcome at any of these funds.

  6. 6
    Posted by Guest | January 10, 2013 at 5:10 PM

    "inverse relationship between penis size and hedge fund performance"

    So what you're telling me is that John Paulson has a huge cock?

  7. 7
    Posted by inlovewithpmco | January 10, 2013 at 5:19 PM

    PMCO this true?

  8. 8
    Posted by Guest | January 10, 2013 at 5:50 PM

    I'll bet backdoorbess has a similar question…

  9. 9
    Posted by guest | January 10, 2013 at 6:05 PM

    What does a number of women running hedge funds have to do with returns they achieve? Do they get bulk discounts or something?

  10. 10
    Posted by Guest | January 10, 2013 at 6:06 PM

    So you're telling me that it has a positive relationship with inverted penises?

  11. 11
    Posted by FKApmco | January 10, 2013 at 6:36 PM

    Don't know ILP; don't care. This is just sexist bullshit.

  12. 12
    Posted by guest | January 10, 2013 at 6:49 PM

    He does now.

  13. 13
    Posted by Fire Jon Shazar | January 10, 2013 at 7:52 PM

    Hoping for positive correlation for blog post length and length of service at Dealbreaker.

  14. 14
    Posted by Guest | January 10, 2013 at 8:22 PM

    Probably because they 'invest' the husband / boyfriend / sugar daddy money first until it runs dry.

  15. 15
    Posted by WTF__k | January 10, 2013 at 10:43 PM

    Sorry, you lost me at "nine-month period".

    (I'll show myself out)

  16. 16
    Posted by Guest | January 11, 2013 at 12:19 AM

    The best example of this is Ina Drew

  17. 17
    Posted by Zoe Cruz | January 11, 2013 at 10:03 AM

    Hey!

  18. 18
    Posted by Misogynist | January 11, 2013 at 1:17 PM

    yes, but can they fuck well?

  19. 19
    Posted by cynthia mcardle | January 22, 2013 at 4:02 AM

    I absolutely agree with this article! Women's touch really does something great, in any thing! Thanks for sharing this awsome post!

  20. 20
    Posted by ijlal | April 23, 2013 at 4:07 AM

    http://www.bestsoccerplayer.com
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  21. 21
    Posted by sohbet | May 12, 2013 at 6:24 PM

    telling these little stories, here's a good idea: Have a point. It makes it so much more interesting for the listener.