• 03 Jan 2013 at 6:26 PM

Instant Message From Bloomberg Salesman To Customer Attempts To Drum Up Interest In New Function For 2013

By

Presumably those who are ready should type MIND BLOWING DISPLAY <go> and hold onto their hats.

Comments (28)

  1. 1
    Posted by moi | January 3, 2013 at 6:38 PM

    what no other comments on mind blowing anal? hewwo! everyone asleep?

  2. 2
    Posted by Guest | January 3, 2013 at 6:41 PM

    Must be a goldman guy to think his client would like receiving anal

  3. 3
    Posted by guest | January 3, 2013 at 6:43 PM

    take a lap.

  4. 4
    Posted by Greg Smith | January 3, 2013 at 6:56 PM

    Wish I had known about this trick in my corporate days

  5. 5
    Posted by guesticles | January 3, 2013 at 6:57 PM

    Muppet

  6. 6
    Posted by guest | January 3, 2013 at 7:00 PM

    Anyone else finding it creepier with his eyes blacked out?

  7. 7
    Posted by Gundlach | January 3, 2013 at 7:01 PM

    Will this display be downloadable?

  8. 8
    Posted by moi | January 3, 2013 at 7:02 PM

    i think anal has been around for a very long time…

  9. 9
    Posted by Bloomberg Employee | January 3, 2013 at 7:11 PM

    Haha, very funny guys. You know I meant to type "mind-blowing display of Real Time Analysis", but it just got cut off.

  10. 10
    Posted by UBS sucks | January 3, 2013 at 7:55 PM

    must work for UBS in his formal role

  11. 11
    Posted by Guest | January 3, 2013 at 8:21 PM

    Two hours and no Ping Jiang jokes? You're all fired. Clean out your desks.

  12. 12
    Posted by Guest | January 3, 2013 at 8:50 PM

    Shazam !

  13. 13
    Posted by Flo | January 3, 2013 at 9:02 PM

    What do you mean by "it"?

  14. 14
    Posted by guest | January 3, 2013 at 9:18 PM

    Yeah, pretty sure everyone got what it really was but thanks for spelling it out.

  15. 15
    Posted by Fixed Income | January 3, 2013 at 10:28 PM

    I've been a Bloomberg customer since 1998 and am still waiting for my rep to show me this feature. I suspect that when Bloomberg knows what his company has been up to, this feature will go the way of the big gulp in NYC.

  16. 16
    Posted by LiveStrong | January 3, 2013 at 11:56 PM

    From the Instant Bloomberg account of J Gundlach…

    12:69:69 Happy Secretary's Day, Martha!
    I'll be working from home today so can you please go into my office, approach the bottom right drawer of my desk (yes right across from the Piet Mondrian on the wall) and gather the following items for me: the Penske file, the pair of handcuffs and my bottle of hand lotion. Also, before finishing the task at hand (and thereby pleasing your boss – aka me- in the process), please gently touch, caress and then lay my Dik…

    Embe Mutombo autographed basketball jersey in a bag and send to me via courier.

    Thanks!

    JG

  17. 17
    Posted by hmm | January 4, 2013 at 9:16 AM

    Well, Shazar, what do you say? You ready?

  18. 18
    Posted by J. Gundlach | January 4, 2013 at 9:17 AM

    No.

  19. 19
    Posted by Ian Gallagher | January 4, 2013 at 9:47 AM

    Shit I must have been out that day!

  20. 20
    Posted by Guest | January 4, 2013 at 9:47 AM

    When I type MIND BLOWING DISPLAY <GO> into Bloomberg, it says "You are not authorized to access this function." Sounds about right…

  21. 21
    Posted by broseph | January 4, 2013 at 10:11 AM

    Bloomberg has so many cute young female reps, and instead they send some creeper with a 5 o'clock shadow to do the demonstration. Go figure.

  22. 22
    Posted by Doug | January 4, 2013 at 11:11 AM

    amazing message GO BLOOMBERG…

  23. 23
    Posted by Momentus | January 4, 2013 at 12:05 PM

    There is no new ground to be covered here….

    -San Francisco

  24. 24
    Posted by HighFrequencyHater | January 4, 2013 at 1:31 PM

    In truth that's about the amont of insight i get from them every time i need to do HELP HELP <GO>

  25. 25
    Posted by UBS SUCKS | January 4, 2013 at 2:35 PM

    Chris Rodskog sucks

  26. 26
    Posted by Nick | January 4, 2013 at 8:36 PM

    Graffiti in the mens room at Goldman "for a good time punch <HELP> <HELP> "

  27. 27
    Posted by guest | January 7, 2013 at 10:34 AM

    aint nothing wrong with a little anal from time to time.

  28. 28
    Posted by sohbet | May 12, 2013 at 6:52 PM

    telling these little stories, here's a good idea: Have a point. It makes it so much more interesting for the listener.