• 09 Jan 2013 at 2:56 PM

Jack Lew To Be Nominated For Treasury Secretary, Sent To Penmanship School

By

As you have likely heard, President Obama plans to put Tim Geithner out of his misery tomorrow by nominating Jack Lew for Treasury Secretary. Lew is known for being Obama’s White House Chief of Staff and also for having an absurd signature. And not like chicken scratch illegible-absurd, like not resembling anything in the alphabet, might as well have drawn an illustration of two alpacas fornicating/signed his name Mariah Carey absurd. And, should he be confirmed and subsequently have his name printed on a bunch of dollar bills, Lew will likely be forced to come up with something that actually looks like it spells “Jacob Lew” as opposed to what is he is currently signing receipts and important documents with, i.e. this:

Jack Lew’s Terrible Signature May Grace Dollar Bills Now [DI]
Related (and one of the many reasons TG can’t wait to GTFO): Timothy Geithner’s signature not fit for print [MarketPlace via DI]

Comments (20)

  1. 1
    Posted by Guest | January 9, 2013 at 2:59 PM

    Of your two examples of absurd signatures, I kind of wish that the "illustration of two alpacas fornicating" was the link.

  2. 2
    Posted by Dennis K. | January 9, 2013 at 3:03 PM

    Alpacas . . . hmmmm . . .

  3. 3
    Posted by Heyman Catcher | January 9, 2013 at 3:16 PM

    Jack Lew Presents "Messin with Sasquatch!"

  4. 4
    Posted by Miffable MD | January 9, 2013 at 3:27 PM

    So, anyone kind of pumped for the Matt article on Loeb vs. Ackman in Herbalife? Anyone alternatively going to be real fucking miffed if Shazar just copies and pastes Deal Book and Deal Journal pieces together and goes back to playing with his Chihuahua?

  5. 5
    Posted by Two For One Deal | January 9, 2013 at 3:49 PM

    Did anyone else see the Taco Bell sponsored content? If they did a cross promotion with Vineyard Vines they could do really well I bet, especially since there's the added incentive you might run into N'08 taking advantage of the same deal and get to throw him in front of oncoming traffic.

  6. 6
    Posted by Hobbes | January 9, 2013 at 3:54 PM

    That signature was destined for one of those trillion dollar coins!

  7. 7
    Posted by InfiniteGuest | January 9, 2013 at 4:04 PM

    I'm no expert but that scribble looks like he was trying to write while being repeatedly kicked in the nuts.

  8. 8
    Posted by Guest | January 9, 2013 at 4:11 PM

    Worst comment this year.

  9. 9
    Posted by Guest | January 9, 2013 at 4:12 PM

    I agree. Weirdly, when I made the suggestion in the opening bell comments, I got a sh!tload of thumbs down.

    -Miffed MD

  10. 10
    Posted by WTF | January 9, 2013 at 4:12 PM

    Your new sponsored post things tends to f*ck up page loading.

  11. 11
    Posted by Im_a_Dude | January 9, 2013 at 4:14 PM

    i knew i recognized that scrawl. its the hair on the peanut's character, Franklin

  12. 12
    Posted by Anagramist | January 9, 2013 at 4:27 PM

    Jack Lew is an anagram of "Lack Jew", which is ironic, because if he becomes Treasury Secretary the department will not lack Jew in its senior management. Too bad his middle initial is not "B".

  13. 13
    Posted by FKApmco | January 9, 2013 at 4:45 PM

    Cause then we'd have Blew Jack and that would probably make Jack a very happy boy??

  14. 14
    Posted by Guest | January 9, 2013 at 4:59 PM

    Eff you commentariat!

  15. 15
    Posted by 10thgradevocab | January 10, 2013 at 9:34 AM

    I'm picturing one grandiose joint article by Bess and Matt

  16. 16
    Posted by Anagramist | January 10, 2013 at 10:17 AM

    I was thinking "Black Jew". Which makes me think of Rod Carew. Whose name is an anagram of "Road Crew". A signal that Jack Lew will be pushing more stimulus?

  17. 17
    Posted by Guest | January 10, 2013 at 2:43 PM

    Go home and try this on your ladyfriend tonight, "I'm no meterologist but I can forsee that you'll be getting at least 4 inches tonight"

  18. 18
    Posted by Guest | January 10, 2013 at 2:43 PM

    shit… i meant 6 inches…

  19. 19
    Posted by Guest | January 11, 2013 at 8:11 AM

    Rirruto?

  20. 20
    Posted by sohbet | May 12, 2013 at 6:32 PM

    telling these little stories, here's a good idea: Have a point. It makes it so much more interesting for the listener.