Jack Lew To Be Nominated For Treasury Secretary, Sent To Penmanship School

As you have likely heard, President Obama plans to put Tim Geithner out of his misery tomorrow by nominating Jack Lew for Treasury Secretary. Lew is known for being Obama’s White House Chief of Staff and also for having an absurd signature. And not like chicken scratch illegible-absurd, like not resembling anything in the alphabet, might as well have drawn an illustration of two alpacas fornicating/signed his name Mariah Carey absurd. And, should he be confirmed and subsequently have his name printed on a bunch of dollar bills, Lew will likely be forced to come up with something that actually looks like it spells “Jacob Lew” as opposed to what is he is currently signing receipts and important documents with, i.e. this:

Jack Lew’s Terrible Signature May Grace Dollar Bills Now [DI]
Related (and one of the many reasons TG can’t wait to GTFO): Timothy Geithner’s signature not fit for print [MarketPlace via DI]

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21 Responses to “Jack Lew To Be Nominated For Treasury Secretary, Sent To Penmanship School”

  1. Guest says:

    Of your two examples of absurd signatures, I kind of wish that the "illustration of two alpacas fornicating" was the link.

  2. Heyman Catcher says:

    Jack Lew Presents "Messin with Sasquatch!"

  3. Miffable MD says:

    So, anyone kind of pumped for the Matt article on Loeb vs. Ackman in Herbalife? Anyone alternatively going to be real fucking miffed if Shazar just copies and pastes Deal Book and Deal Journal pieces together and goes back to playing with his Chihuahua?

  4. Two For One Deal says:

    Did anyone else see the Taco Bell sponsored content? If they did a cross promotion with Vineyard Vines they could do really well I bet, especially since there's the added incentive you might run into N'08 taking advantage of the same deal and get to throw him in front of oncoming traffic.

  5. Hobbes says:

    That signature was destined for one of those trillion dollar coins!

  6. InfiniteGuest says:

    I'm no expert but that scribble looks like he was trying to write while being repeatedly kicked in the nuts.

  7. WTF says:

    Your new sponsored post things tends to f*ck up page loading.

  8. Im_a_Dude says:

    i knew i recognized that scrawl. its the hair on the peanut's character, Franklin

  9. Anagramist says:

    Jack Lew is an anagram of "Lack Jew", which is ironic, because if he becomes Treasury Secretary the department will not lack Jew in its senior management. Too bad his middle initial is not "B".

    • FKApmco says:

      Cause then we'd have Blew Jack and that would probably make Jack a very happy boy??

      • Anagramist says:

        I was thinking "Black Jew". Which makes me think of Rod Carew. Whose name is an anagram of "Road Crew". A signal that Jack Lew will be pushing more stimulus?

  10. Guest says:


  11. sohbet says:

    telling these little stories, here's a good idea: Have a point. It makes it so much more interesting for the listener.

  12. sohbet says:

    officers to investigate Blackstone's fishy financial transactions, but they wound up giving them