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Want To Wake Up With Mandy Drury?

Or Becky Quick? Or Andrew Ross Sorkin? Joe Kernen? Jim Cramer? Because you think it would be a pleasant way to start the morning or, alternatively, a horrifying way sure to get you out of bed without delay? Now you can!

CNBC has launched an alarm clock app that allows you to select your anchor of choice for a daily wake-up call. Sadly, they are not personalized to the user but each host does wake you up in his or her own distinctive way (Sorkin says “It’s go time,” while Jim Cramer shrieks “WAKE UP AND BUY 100 SHARES OF BEAR STEARNS”).* Joe Kernen was very disappointed to hear Becky Quick’s line is not “Wake up, baby” but you can download the dulcet tones of Rick Santelli, so it’s not all bad.

Chairs: CNBC Launches Alarm Clock App [CNBC]
*Actually just “WAKE UP!” but a girl can dream. While we’re dreaming, perhaps “They know nothing!”? For version 2.0?

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19 Responses to “Want To Wake Up With Mandy Drury?”

  1. VonSloneker says:

    "Wake up and help me find my underwear, Baby"

    – Jackie DeAngelis & Kelly Evans

  2. DB User #1 says:

    Thanks for the tip, but I am happy with my MSNBC alarm clock app. I enjoy getting up to the roaring thunder of Rachel Maddows queefs.

  3. Scary times says:

    Will the Cramer one be accompanied by a text from his DB account?

  4. Guest says:

    I'd rather wake up to Shazar's chihuahua pissing in my ear than wake up to any one of those clowns.

  5. CoveredLong says:

    After reading the sponsored content, I've decided to hold out for the app that wakes me up with the soothing sounds of t.A.T.u's "All The Things She Said" and a fresh Taco Bell Loaded Griller.

    • Bored Guest says:

      Runnin' through my head, runnin' through my head…

      WELL! Day = ruined.

    • VonSloneker says:

      Soothing sounds of what??? Little darling close your eyes, there'll be no compromising…

      – Simple Minds

    • Donnie Wahlberg says:

      Dulcet tones of Santelli crooning 'Nothing at All' backed by O-Town.

      They gotta be working cheap these days, no?

  6. Guest says:

    Is there an option to wake up to Gasparino grunting while doing savage torturous squat thrusts in the Equinox steam room?

    -asking for a friend

  7. FKApmco says:

    Bessar: we need a DB app stat. Just think of the possibilities.
    Mrs Naked Short: it's not in our color palette
    Perma: a selection of 6 different quotes about WWI, WWII or battle ships
    VonStonker: a whinny (if you don't get this joke you are not a true DB reader)
    Me: anything you want me to say in any language
    Etc. etc. etc.

    Matt we will save for the insomnia app.

    • Clock Radio Quant says:

      East texas oil trader for those hungover mornings where you need something extra loud.

  8. Guest says:

    No clock for me either. I glued a picture of Bess's head to a canteloupe along with one of those chips in a Hallmark card that says "Happy Birthday, sunshine" and set it to go off at 5:30am.

    -Guy who realizes the real Bess doesn't actually get up that early but…

  9. Guest says:

    Can I get Jeff Macke screaming at me in tongues?

    • Keep This Going says:

      Dennis K bitching about his poor treatment on Dealbreaker? Dylan Ratigan talking about what meth-binge-inspired costume he's going to pull out that day?

  10. Erin says:

    I hear they archived the audio of Maria doung that Citi guy on the plane from Davos
    For use in future contract disputes.

  11. J. Gundlach says:

    Hmm, I wonder if something like this could help my employees get motivated in the morning.

  12. Pietro_F says:

    Will they include Reformed Broker talking out of both sides simultaneously?

  13. guest says:

    Headline is misleading…

    -Disappointed

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