• 21 Mar 2013 at 5:27 PM

Bankers’ Tips For Saving Money Involve Putting Their Bitches To Work

By

One banker, who used to work at Goldman Sachs and now runs his own business, said he gets his wife to iron his shirts nowadays. “At Goldman there was a service in the basement where I dropped my shirts off for a fee, but now I ask Jane to do it for me,” he said. “The wife is doing the ironing,” another banker told us. “She’s not loving it, but she doesn’t want to get a job herself so is having to accept it.” [eFinancial]

Comments (12)

  1. 1
    Posted by Chuck Magoo | March 21, 2013 at 5:37 PM

    "It puts the lotion in the basket."

    -B. Bill

  2. 2
    Posted by VonSloneker | March 21, 2013 at 5:47 PM

    Yeah, now that he's not at Goldman I iron more shirts…but I'm giving zero blowjobs.

    - Jane

  3. 3
    Posted by DingALing | March 21, 2013 at 6:01 PM

    "She even goes out shopping for me. I asked her to iron one shirt when I left and there was another shirt on the floor in the bedroom when I got back"

    -Ex GS Banker

  4. 4
    Posted by PIMCO Tip Quant | March 21, 2013 at 6:15 PM

    Also, apparently taking a page out of Bill Gross' playabook is advised:

    The more money you have in your pocket, the more you will want to spend it. “Stop carrying a wedge of cash around with you,” said the ex-Goldman banker. “It reduces the temptation to tip people so much.”

  5. 5
    Posted by Guest | March 21, 2013 at 7:23 PM

    Don't make fun of my… er… his pain.

    - M. Levine

  6. 6
    Posted by Danker_Banker | March 21, 2013 at 7:34 PM

    If I tried to pull that shit on my wife I'd get a hot iron to the face.

  7. 7
    Posted by 12incher | March 22, 2013 at 4:15 AM

    Dude, grow a pair. You ain't no BSD

  8. 8
    Posted by Lazy | March 22, 2013 at 10:18 AM

    What kind of prick buys shirt you have to iron?

    - guy who buys non-iron shirts

  9. 9
    Posted by Guest | March 22, 2013 at 10:39 AM

    Shirts…sigh

    UBS Attire Quant

  10. 10
    Posted by Mrs_Slocombe | March 22, 2013 at 11:43 AM

    “Thank God, now I don’t have to run across town to take his shirts to the cleaner.”

    –X-Banker’s new hot 22 y’old assistant.

    “Thank God, my wife is stuck at home ironing my shirts— now I have all afternoon to bang my hot assistant”

    X-Goldman Banker…..and dude who was sick of half-assed, shitty blowjobs from Jane.

  11. 11
    Posted by UBS Garlic Quant | March 22, 2013 at 11:57 AM

    Shirts are the least of your concerns if you pick the wrong dish at lunch.

  12. 12
    Posted by IBD > Ops | March 22, 2013 at 6:25 PM

    The guys in front office.