As you all well know, Steve Cohen has been on a bit of a shopping spree lately. And while the SAC Capital founder is a fairly wealthy man and can buy most if not all of what his heart desires, it never hurts to have a little extra cash on hand (one never knows when an impulse purchase will present itself). That’s where you come in.

Cohen has put his One Beacon Court apartment on the market and has set the asking price for the place– purchased in 2005 for $24 million– at $115 mill. While the Observer notes that the East 58th Street duplex is a hike from Central Park and comes with no outdoor space of its own, it does include 9,000 square feet and servant’s quarters that you could easily dump a few gallons of sand in, throw up a couple of faux palm trees, and have yourself a nice little beach scene. Most importantly, you’d be doing the Big Guy a solid in his time of need. When he buys the Louvre you can say you helped make it happen. Act fast and he’ll probably throw in the life-size bobblehead and a couple of random chargers to video cameras and first generation Apple products.

The Rumors Are True: Steve Cohen Lists $115 M. One Beacon Court Penthouse [NYO]

34 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (34)

  1. Posted by Hindsight Guest | April 10, 2013 at 1:59 PM

    20% annualised – should have put the dough in his own fund.

  2. Posted by Icelandic Banker | April 10, 2013 at 2:11 PM

    Just out of curiosity… what are the common charges, and can they be paid by bitcoins?

  3. Posted by Icelandic Banker | April 10, 2013 at 2:15 PM

    $115 mill 2013 is only about $35 of my 2005 bitcoins collection.

  4. Posted by PermaGuestII | April 10, 2013 at 2:17 PM

    I'm sure it's some piece of priceless modern art but… what the fuck with the creepy life-sized bobblehead doll on the end table?

  5. Posted by Guest | April 10, 2013 at 2:22 PM

    I thought that the entire point of having $115M to your name was so that you could leave NYC for somewhere with sun, heat, and privacy, and never come back again unless you absolutely wanted to.

  6. Posted by NakedShort | April 10, 2013 at 2:23 PM

    I would have been very interested if he would have thrown in a couple of Rollies for the kitchen.

  7. Posted by Im_a_Dude | April 10, 2013 at 2:23 PM

    first i thought its Steve himself, then realized it had too much hair.

  8. Posted by NakedShort | April 10, 2013 at 2:27 PM

    Heres a tip: 1.21 gigawatts!!!!!!!

  9. Posted by Icelandic Banker | April 10, 2013 at 2:29 PM

    Just out of curiosity… what are the common charges, and can they be paid by bitcoins?

  10. Posted by Hobbes | April 10, 2013 at 2:29 PM

    Seems reasonable.

    – S&P Housing Analyst

  11. Posted by Cteve Sohen | April 10, 2013 at 2:31 PM

    Dudes really trying to impress Bess.

  12. Posted by Guest | April 10, 2013 at 2:37 PM

    I would very much like to make love to your billy goat.

  13. Posted by Guest? | April 10, 2013 at 2:37 PM

    OH MY GOD, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE!

    SALE!

  14. Posted by Guest | April 10, 2013 at 2:42 PM

    You need at least 37.5 billion to even be on Bess's radar.

  15. Posted by Fewdollarsmore | April 10, 2013 at 2:52 PM

    He would have sold it earlier but it took Steve Cohen some time to get Martoma to vacate the servant quarters.

  16. Posted by guest | April 10, 2013 at 2:59 PM
  17. Posted by Damien Hirst | April 10, 2013 at 3:09 PM

    I have a business proposition for anyone here with a cool $115MM. I'll make it watertight, fill it with formaldehyde solution, float a dead SEC agent in it and we'll sell it back to him for $175MM.

  18. Posted by Fort. son | April 10, 2013 at 3:17 PM

    sale

  19. Posted by Puck It | April 10, 2013 at 3:49 PM

    Y'know, Steve-o, you don't have to post your own cash necessarily. There are bail bondsmen who will lend against your real estate. Just sayin'.

  20. Posted by M.M. | April 10, 2013 at 3:52 PM

    Yeah, well, the jerk store called and they're running outta you!

  21. Posted by Falcone | April 10, 2013 at 4:08 PM

    or investors. Either/or.

  22. Posted by Bored Guest | April 10, 2013 at 4:26 PM

    How'd you find that?

  23. Posted by Guest | April 10, 2013 at 4:34 PM

    But where do you keep the sausage?

  24. Posted by Guest Guest | April 10, 2013 at 4:56 PM

    Leverage?

  25. Posted by Giest | April 10, 2013 at 5:09 PM

    487k for that goofy bobble head? Fuck Wall Street, I'm gonna take my kids shitty art projects and projects and market them to Hedgies.

  26. Posted by bernie | April 10, 2013 at 5:11 PM

    Perhaps, Steve should keep the place just in case. He might even sleep there, in order not get busted in front of his kids.

  27. Posted by Guest | April 10, 2013 at 5:15 PM

    There are dozens of us!

  28. Posted by Fewdollarsmore | April 10, 2013 at 5:19 PM

    Don't be mad if you got the binary sudoku wrong. It is a 50-50 chance!

  29. Posted by guest@guest.com | April 10, 2013 at 5:41 PM

    Did you really use the term "Hedgies"?

    You must be new around these parts.

  30. Posted by guest | April 10, 2013 at 7:33 PM

    He bought the beach house, so he could use the sand. Now he's selling his old Hampton house and now this to build up a cash pile to bury on the beach for when he's in jail.

  31. Posted by Matt's Auntie | April 10, 2013 at 7:41 PM

    not any more…

  32. Posted by Bromangroup | April 10, 2013 at 9:13 PM

    hahahah this is why I love this site

  33. Posted by Yaniv Vaknin | April 11, 2013 at 4:16 AM

    Boring. How about you and circle jerk having your weekly session at the appt. and fill it up with solution while sessioning?

    Oh… Must be YouTubeed

  34. Posted by travis | April 11, 2013 at 9:17 AM

    Sounds like a bargain to me

    -John Paulson