What Fate Awaits The Next People To Question Charlie Gasparino’s Reporting: A Continuing Series

As those of you who’ve followed the career of Charles Gasparino know, before he became a fixture on Fox Business, CG got his start at the Tampa Tribune, followed by Bond World, followed by Bond Buyer (and Newsday, the Journal, and CNBC after that). Since Gasparino remembers his days at BB fondly, as a time of working in the trenches, honing his craft, sporting the mustache and suspenders at left, and hitting the speed bag that hung over his desk in between stories, the rumor he heard earlier today that the publication might be closing struck a chord. With a wave of nostalgia crashing over him, and knowing that the community would look to him for direction in this time of sadness, Gasparino took to Twitter to post a 140 character eulogy, writing:

sad day if true: was told @TheBondBuyer is closing. gave a lot of us our start including @JoeMysak and even once paved the way for reform

Charlie’s reminiscence quickly turned sour, however, when an editor at American Banker (owned by the same company that publishes Bond Buyer) wrote that the publication was not in fact closing, as did a fellow named Richard Melville, who works for Source Media, Bond Buyer‘s parent company, and appears to have started a Twitter account today for the sole purpose of denying Gasparino’s story. And while moment earlier, Charlie was mourning the passing of his old stomping grounds, suddenly the gloves and the top three buttons on the nice black suit he’d worn for the occasion were off:

@richmelville had the ring of being true because the last time u guys broke a story was when I was there in 94

From there, all hell broke loose, as things often tend to do when people dare to question Gasparino’s reporting:

@HeatherLandy gfy; I said “sad IF true” u moron now go back to writing that muni bonds remain unchanged

@strobist u stand no chance putting me over ur knee much less raising a hand

@TheTechEconomy thanks dan ill keep that in mind the next time u break a story move a mkt which means i aint holding my breath

@seansposito @richmelville little known fact: who ever this guy is got two followers in addit to his mother when i ans one of his tweets

@seansposito @richmelville ur pathetic enjoy the american banker its probably ur last stop

@seansposito @richmelville ill be around long after ur in public relations making $50 a week or unemployed

@ManerdM i wear it as a badge of honor that i dont know who u are

@VendbienJon yes i need that steak sandwich medium rare when u get my dry cleaning

In times like these, as a public service and for the benefit of those who won’t have access to Twitter for the next few hours, we like to predict future CG tweets that people taking issue with his special brand of journalism will be on the receiving end of. So far, we’ve betting on:

  • “I’m surprised they didn’t shut bond buyer down after I left, woulda been the humane thing to do”
  • “[To a man] you’re lucky my mother always told me never to hit a woman”
  • “I love sparing with numbnuts like you, means I can skip the gym tonight”
  • “I think i’ve seen you before, weren’t you handing out towels in the men’s room at the Grand Havana Room last night?”
  • “I’ve eaten googootz that broke more stories than u”
  • “I said IF TRUE, as in, I’m hearing CG just pulverized your legs with his IROC-Z. If true, you’d be in a lot of pain right now.

Charlie Gasparino [Twitter]

(hidden for your protection)
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27 Responses to “What Fate Awaits The Next People To Question Charlie Gasparino’s Reporting: A Continuing Series”

  1. Guest says:

    CD's sources are consistently wrong. This tweet validates his record.

  2. Guest says:

    Chazza, DB is your oyster. Welcome. You do charts?

  3. yeah says:

    Stupid pasta eater

  4. Guest says:

    Charlie unzips his fanny pack of fury.

  5. Little Girlie Man says:

    Gaspo! unrelated to possible rage issues, any idea where can I pick up some good 'roids?

    (Nice 'stache, why'd you lose it?)

  6. Matt Levine's Ghost says:

    "You'll be working for leftover pizza at Dealbreaker with Shazar while I'm flexing my pecs for the 2014 Hottest Finance Journos Calendar"

  7. Diesel Gas says:

    Dis fuckin' guy!

  8. Bandersnatch says:

    "Tonight's top story: the sewers run red with American Banker's blood."

  9. Guest says:

    I always wince when I see written communications by a grown man containing constructions like "u" "ur" etc. The only thing missing is an LOL. I know it's twitter, but still.

  10. guest says:

    Gasparino – Try the f'ing decaf you spaz.

  11. Eliott Spitzer says:

    Way to go Chuckles. You continue to be the best thing CNBC has going for them :))))

    BTW – when was the last time you reported anything accurately? And was that necessarily "news" as you criticize others for "not breaking news and moving markets". Actually, you've never done either in your life as you are far too stupid to understand anything upon which you are reporting!!!!!! You have a career batting average for reporting accuracy that is lower than your double digit IQ!


  12. Tyrone Moustache says:

    Only the Soul Train has a soul purpose

  13. Guest says:

    Chaz testosterone logic: it's better to break a story that is complete bullshit than never break a story at all?

  14. BigFatMrsGasBag says:

    Yuz guys stop picking on my huzzy. Ya, he might be da biggest dope in the da media but he's my dope. He might be wrong 97% of da time, but I give him a bj da utter 6% of da time when he is right. i know he breaks gas rather den break news and he's had more jobs den Bill Clinton has hand blow jobs, I love to smelll dat gas as it curbs my appetite. Dats why I have gone from a robust 260# down to a svelt 257.5#. Dats why I love him so.

    Hurry home tonight honey as it is time for our bi-annual romp in da hay. I got da blue pills so yous can get it up and plenty of KY so dat both inches stay hard. I know dat you like hangin out in da mens room to overhear breaking news dat is usually not true – but you know dat fat chicks like me have tits dat really jiggle for you.

  15. Choopie says:

    Don't be mean to Charlie. Don't forget that he is a Pulitzer nominee!

  16. Brian Fantana says:

    60% of the time, it works every time.

  17. Guest says:

    Gasper has at least one follower and viewer – Bess. Beyond that, beats me.