Muffie Benson-Perella

Posts by Muffie Benson-Perella

An Interview With Benjamin N. Dover, III

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Muffie Benson-PerellaMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a “Bulge Bracket” bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school’s “French Club.” Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of “Muffie on Markets” (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.
Certainly history will write its own lists of heroes and villains with respect to the credit crisis. It is a sort of mandatory, cleansing practice that collates the pages of the current time of troubles. And, while many of history’s verdicts may form less than a consensus, it seems clear that the verdict rendered for Benjamin N. Dover, III will be one of the rosier ones.
Mr. Dover’s sometimes controversial, but always insightful observations writ large by the disclosure requirements of the SEC and FDIC public comment process have set the cutting edge for debate on everything from short-selling to the PPIP programs for the last several weeks. Here is a passage of his work:

Truth #1: Stock Market Crashes Are Caused By Stock Sales.
It should be painfully obvious by now that the market’s decline since November 2007 was caused by stock selling. Not even pernicious speculators like George Soros would dispute this basic truth. Similarly, the market’s steep fall after several large bank failures and the deepening of the economic crisis in September 2008 also was the result of stock selling. We can safely conclude, therefore, that had stock sales been banned in 2007 the stock market crash of 2008-2009 never would have happened. Logically, it follows that banning stock sales would also prevent future market crashes.

Agree or disagree, you simply cannot ignore his common sense approach to markets, finance and economics. But who is Benjamin N. Dover, III? Very little biographical information is available on the maverick finance expert, but I decided to find out. Accordingly, to lift the curtain on this modern finance mind I sat down with Benjamin N. Dover III at the Peninsula for his first public interview:
Muffie Benson-Perella: Benjamin Dover, is that British? Perhaps Irish?
B. Dover: I’m an American original. (Not be confused, of course, with Native American.) And I appreciate your calling me by my given name. For some odd reason, many people seem to find it amusing to use its abbreviation.

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Don’t Even Try To Blame Harvard For This Mess

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Muffie Benson-PerellaMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a “Bulge Bracket” bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school’s “French Club.” Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of “Muffie on Markets” (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.
Apparently it has become fashionable to bash higher education. And it seems to be even more fashionable to bash higher higher education and the graduate programs that compose it. It doesn’t take an in-depth understanding of non-linear systems in mathematics to draw a straight line right to the premise that bashing the highest institutions of higher higher education [(higher)3 if you will] has become the most fashionable. This little bit of social algebra is borne out by the number of no-nothing articles, petty blogs and opinionated op-ed pieces that have, of late, attacked no lesser a monument than the noble and proud edifice of the Harvard Business School.
A recent Bloomberg piece (written by a Columbia graduate, obviously) went so far as to suggest that a November task-force was formed at HBS as a reaction to scrutinize the ability of HBS to teach risk management and develop a case to facilitate that goal. Of course, this betrays a very poor understanding of the role of cases at HBS. Harvard cases are written to market to other institutions. Attempting to teach actual Harvard cases to Harvard students would result in a massive and near violent revolt of apathy and boredom. The width and breadth of world experience already under the skirt of the matriculating Harvard student makes any attempt to teach the trite and condescending prose that typifies the average Harvard case the height of effrontery. To the extent cases are discussed at all in HBS classes it is to critique them for their eventual redistribution to the Crimson-challenged. Clearly, the task-force discussed in the article is to distribute better risk management teaching expertise to the world and prevent the sort of melt-down that non-Harvard types seem to enjoy causing every 20 years or so. Despite all our efforts to place alumni at the top, and in key positions around the country, incompetent minions, listless staff and executives who cannot learn to take orders manage to scuttle our progress time after time.

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  • 03 Feb 2009 at 7:51 AM

Opening Bell: 02.03.09

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Picture 663.pngBanks’ Urge To Merge (NYP)
Union Bank of Wachovia? UBS and WB are in talks to possibly merge their wealth-management units, a la Morgan Barney.
UBS Talked With Morgan Stanley On US Brokerage (Reuters)
It looks like the more tax-evadey Swiss bank in town and Morgan Stanley *were* in talks wherein the latter would consume the formers brokerage unit – no reason is given for either member walking away from the table.
“Last month Morgan Stanley agreed to combine its brokerage with Citigroup (C.N) Inc’s Smith Barney unit, paying Citi $2.7 billion and initially taking a 51 percent stake.
Talks for a sale of the brokerage unit by the Swiss bank are not unexpected. Last summer, sources told Reuters that the bank was considering a sale of its U.S. wealth management business, formerly known as PaineWebber, as part of a review of its business.”
In quasi-related news, the Times has a piece on the IRS expanding its probe into UBS and the bank’s graceful attempt to defraud the US Tax System on a mind numbing scale.
“The Internal Revenue Service, which is participating in a broad federal investigation into UBS and its offshore private banking services, is widening its scrutiny to include ordinary accounts owned by Americans who work overseas, according to a person briefed on the issue.”
Citigroup Leads Tumble in Hybrid Bonds on Nationalization Bets (Bloomberg)
“The hybrids, which typically count as regulatory capital to cushion against losses, fell 11 percent last month in the U.S., more than they did in all of 2008, according to Merrill Lynch & Co. index data. Citigroup and Bank of America bonds lost as much as 34 percent of their value.
“The danger is the government’s going to take over everything and not pay anything,” said Gregory Habeeb, who manages $7.5 billion in fixed-income securities at Calvert Asset Management Co. in Bethesda, Maryland. “It could happen.”"
Citi’s been having a rough go at it lately (to put it lightly) – what with having to return their new plane and take on three hundred billion plus in capital from the government. Sadly but not that surprisingly, they’re looking at backing out of the marketing deal with the Mets, and while I’m sure they could use the money (the Mets) there has to be some kind of collected wiping of the sweat off the brow – you’d almost need a public relations team to handle the marketing nightmare.

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    • 02 Feb 2009 at 7:43 AM

    Opening Bell: 02.02.09

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    Picture 657.pngNadel Denied Bail, Plays With Soap-On-A-Rope In Shower (FINAlternatives)
    The problem is the scope of the alleged crime: it was too reasonable. If you’re going to commit an act of fraud (and get caught) the idea is to go so big that when people learn of the duplicitous act they’re forced to sit down and put their heads between their knees. You have to go for the “I literally shit myself when I heard about that” fraud. See: Madoff.
    Lehman’s The Place To Be (WSJ)
    Need a job? Try Lehman! New “CEO” Bryan Marsal has kept (slash brought back) about 320 of the original Lehman crew to help through the winding down of the company, and they’re looking for real-estate and derivatives people still yet. The dismantling is expected to take 18 to 24 months – I could see it going to 32 – which provides a rare form of job security in today’s market. There’s also this unsettling, albeit true quote: “Given the state of the world we’re in, the things I’m learning working on the largest bankruptcy in history are a set of skills that could be marketable for the foreseeable future.”
    In related, news the Financial Times has it that Lehman creditors could receive stock in lieu of cash:
    “The plan would allow Lehman to cordon off difficult-to-sell assets and wait for the markets to improve, preventing a fire sale of its holdings, said Marsal, co-head of Alvarez and Marsal, which is managing Lehman’s liquidation. It is now in its preliminary stages but, if it is adopted, the two standalone companies could be publicly listed within two years.”
    Steelers Win Sixth Super Bowl (WSJ)
    Thoughts? Favorite Commercials?

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      • 04 Nov 2008 at 1:12 PM

      See You There! (Maybe)

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      Muffie Benson-PerellaMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a “Bulge Bracket” bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school’s “French Club.” Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of “Muffie on Markets” (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.
      Many organizations found their real focus when forced underground, you know.

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      • 29 Oct 2008 at 4:11 PM

      The Closing Belle: Your Negativity Makes Me Want To Aspirate Repeatedly Into My Oxygen Mask

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      m2small.jpgMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a “Bulge Bracket” bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school’s “French Club.” Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of “Muffie on Markets” (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.
      I am sick and tired of all the doom-sayers going around and trashing the economy. Someone please explain to me how the economy can be “tanking” when an automaker is the largest market cap stock in the world, eclipsing an oil company? Does that sound like recession to you? When a middle-class yuppie car with so-so gas mileage is putting the black gold people to shame? I don’t think so.
      Then there is the hint that says all that needs saying: certain highly prestigious investment banks are back into the triple digits where they belong. Yahoo and AOL are in talks that will permit Yahoo to finally overpay for AOL. Casinos are back in vogue. Don’t give me that “dead cat bounce” thing either. That is so, so tired.
      Look, it is beyond depressing when Cramer is the only person who agrees with me. Let’s get on the stick ok?
      As you may or may not be aware, my birthday is this week. I’m expecting big things from the ‘rents this year. As such, you people need to get on it and start buying some shares. Get off the sidelines. The nation is looking to us for leadership. My birthday presents are looking to you for leadership. We have to set the pace. Sprint for the first few miles. Then we can relax, let the pack follow along, and lag back until a taxi comes along to take us to the finish. You know what I mean. I’m talking about consumer confidence. I’m talking about spending. I’m talking about boosting the debt loads again. I’m talking about patriotism.
      I realize that it looks a little like we have to behave ourselves and be good while Waxman is watching, but its just temporary. This is no time to cancel plans for Lech. This is not the time to postpone the engagement. This is absolutely not the time to cancel the sailing trip.
      As for your fear-factor rhetoric, I don’t want to hear it. Get your ass in gear and start buying baubles for your loved one. That is what is needed today. Purchase courage.
      Ok, you people, you are not listening. Just since I’ve been typing this you bombed the entire market. We were up to 970 on the SAP for god sake. You killed 40 points in 4 minutes. That is not cooperation. That is not the kind of leadership I am talking about. Is there a man among you? Even one? Am I going to have to find a date from Citibank for the Christmas party this year?
      I’m done for the day. I am going to borrow Aunty’s oxygen tank for a few minutes and then I am going for a well deserved spa day.
      I feel totally nauseous. You people make me sick.

      • 16 Oct 2008 at 5:06 PM

      The Closing Belle: Just A Touch Of White, Is All

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      Muffie Benson-PerellaMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a “Bulge Bracket” bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school’s “French Club.” Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of “Muffie on Markets” (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.
      I’m sure that a certain subset of my public understands the occasional difficulties implicit in the “work hard, play hard” lifestyle. You know who you are, my lovelies.
      Sometimes you just have to go with the flow a little on Wednesday after work. The blackberry starts buzzing around 6:30 or 7:00, with friends planning and plotting the evening’s entertainment. While most of my inner circle aren’t prone to childish bickering, they can try the patience with the back and forth over the “perfect environment for after work cocktails” debate. (Personally, I grow tired of ‘Netti since that tart Lauren is always there. I really don’t know who she thinks she is. Someone cares, I’m certain, that her boyfriend is from California, but I don’t know precisely who that someone is).
      And you get there, a little tired because you were trying to work a little less hard than usual and avoid that bastard of a Senior Vice President who keeps looking at your boobs and still hasn’t figured out that you can totally tell and your sponsor Managing Director is out of town and I am pretty sure that he is seeing someone else and I don’t mean his wife and that would totally make him a liar and I just don’t have time for liars at this stage in my life, so you probably have that first cosmo a little faster than you mean to and the second one is sort of in your hand before you know it.

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      • 13 Oct 2008 at 6:11 PM

      Some Of You Should Be Totally Ashamed!

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      Muffie Benson-PerellaMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a “Bulge Bracket” bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school’s “French Club.” Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of “Muffie on Markets” (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.
      All month people were crying and whining about how awfully-ouchie-devastating the market was. And then, last week, it was positively depressing the lack of enthusiasm and spirit some market players, who really should have known better, showed. Shame on you. Frankly, I am tempted to wonder after the patriotism of anyone who was doom-and-glooming last week.
      People forget awfully quickly that a few hundred points on the Dow is something like several trillion dollars. So, really, owning stock in Dow is really a big responsibility. It’s not for everyone. Just for the record, Dow was up 6.93% today, closing at $26.09.
      The broader market showed amazing spunk! The S&P 500 was up 104.13 (11.58%) to 1003.35.
      Also, people have totally ignored that prices for the average consumer have been dropping for weeks. Platts puts the weekly price of Jet A at $2.73 cents. That’s like a 15.0% drop in the last month! The operations of senior managers and the few prestigious investment banks still left standing because of their exceptional investment acumen are going to be much cheaper as a result of lowered fuel costs. Not to mention the impact this has on the recreational sector, just in time for the winter holiday travel season.
      The rest of the Muff Round-Up after the jump.

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