See if you can do it at Jefferies, where second year analysts were just laid off with two and a half months severance and seventy five percent of last year’s bonus. The best part is that, supposedly, management only canned the kids who’d already found alternative employment for their third year in big people world. Prefer the element of surprise/negative cash flow in your firing? Best to stick with the pros (Bear, Citi, DealBreaker, etc).
Profits at Jefferies shot up 48% during the second quarter, the firm said today. The surge was due in large part to everyone’s favorite legalized crack– investment banking fees. IB revenues were up 81% to a record $223.1 million from 2006′s $122.9 million.
This is one of those “better than expected” moments. Analysts had pegged net income growth at 39 cents per share and it came in at 45 cents. That’s a 15 percent beat over expectations. Pretty nice but not quite worthy of a celebratory dwarf-toss.
Dick Handler, Chairman and CEO applauded 4/1-6/30 as the “best quarter in Jefferies’ 45-year history.”
Congrats, etc, but come on, Dick. Better than the first quarter of 1987? We think not.
UPDATE: A VP with the bank confirms: “All I can say is that while there won’t be dwarfs, odds of strippers are high to very high.”
Growth in investment banking boosts Jefferies [MarketWatch]
Jefferies Press Release