Immaculate Collection Of Garbage

Great news for the ninety three percent of DealBreaker readers who call themselves “serious” Madonna fans, publically or privately (don’t be ashamed of your shame, Carney’s also in the closet about this). You can now give U.K.-based Marquee Capital at least $19,000 for a minimum of ten years and hope that the Madonna memorabilia they’ve been quietly amassing to create “the world’s largest collection” of Madge crap, including outfits she’s worn and a signed American Express card, are flipped for mucho dinero. The firm’s CEO, Chetan Trivedi, says potential investors should get in now, before Madonna’s 50th birthday, when things like an empty water bottle fished out of the singer’s trash can will go for maybe twice the price of what it cost them to buy the bottle from the bum who dug it out in the first place, and triple what Madge paid for it originally. Marquee will also be selling items that previously belonged to Michael Jackson (his kiddie porn collection) and Elton John (same). Back to the scat play.
Does Madonna-Centered Investment Strategy Have A Prayer? [FINalternatives]

I’m sure all you rabid Stanley Burrell fans have known about/been discussing the news in chat rooms for weeks at this point but Carney sent me a “high-priority” e-mail this morning outlining the reasons—too embarrassing, for him, to mention—why it bears repeating so here and now: MC Hammer is launching, a new site MCH hopes will become “the Internet’s hub for sharing and watching dance videos,” this month. DJ will apparently provide “demonstrations and information about a wide variety of dances,” and also offer viewers the chance to judge user submitted videos, which should be good for a laugh. There’s no one on earth who wants to see this thing, via ad sales*, help MC get out of the $14 million in debt he got himself into in the mid-late ‘90s more than us but our inner cynical asshole is skeptical. We don’t disagree that Mr. Hammer inhales and exhales “this stuff,” and we’ll note that someone we work with has been waiting for what feels like years for a site to come along that will show the unwashed masses proper “Hands Up (Give Me Your Heart)” technique so he can “stop going to weddings and Bar Mitzvahs and watching people fumble around and fuck it up.” But other than that co-worker, who we like to call “Ron Blarney,” and a few sick freaks who get off on watching strangers look like idiots on the internet, who’s going to use this thing? And, more to the point, can any of these amateurs top this?

Read more »

  • 21 Nov 2007 at 11:55 AM
  • Fox

Fox Business Continues Edgy Hip-Hop/R&B Series

Only, spoiler alert, it’s totally boring. Nothing like the Jermaine Dupri interview and not even in the same league as the 50 Cent spot. As someone who attended a Boyz II Men concert as recently as a few weeks ago, and until then, had a Post-It on my computer reading “Remember to buy Boyz II Men tickets,” this was disappointing. And after all the points FB won with the Arabs! We’re not going to write them off just yet, but Neil Cavuto needs to think about what he’s done. (Dude didn’t even act smug or self-satisfied, though we did appreciate it when he said, “You guys look like bankers!” and “I thought the line of fans outside was for me” before LOLing his own joke and ruining it. ) Thanksgiving starts tomorrow, not today, bub. Shape up.

  • 30 Oct 2007 at 3:40 PM
  • music

Riddle Us This:

A. Why do the big 4 (accounting firms) feel the need to have a gay anthem?
B. If you had to pick a winner, would it be PWC’s (courtesy of ESPN’s TMQ) or Ernst and Young‘s?

  • 18 Jul 2007 at 2:25 PM
  • music

Why Trickle Down Economics Works

stones1_1.jpg Record bonuses for a good cause (the Keith Richards blood infusion program) From the Huffington Post:

THE ROLLING STONES played an intimate gig for 500 bankers in Spain – and were paid $5.4 million (GBP2.7 million) for their private stage show. The rockers’ two year A Bigger Bang tour is said to be one of the longest and highest grossing ever, having pulled in over $436 million (GBP218 million) to date. But that didn’t stop the musicians supplementing their income with an 80-minute set at a party organised by Deutsche Bank in the Catalan National Art Museum in Barcelona, Spain last week (12Jul07). And frontman Mick Jagger admitted he was delighted to be earning so much from the wealthy bankers. He told the crowd, “Thank you for having us. The best part is, it’s coming out of your bonuses.”

I guess someone had to clean up after the band, and bankers, after the set (and by this we mean all the underwear DB bankers threw on stage). Beautiful economic gears in motion…
Rolling Stones Play Private Deutsche Bank Gig, Paid $67,500 A Minute [Huffington Post]

  • 21 May 2007 at 3:20 PM
  • music

Backstreet Boys reunion tour coming to NYC!

backstreet.jpg The Backstreet Boys are coming to NYC, performing live at the Supreme Court of New York County. The still-wishing-they-were-pubescent outfit claims boy band impresario Lou Pearlman and Trans Continental Records (TCR) still owe around $4mm to cover subsequent career mistakes of individual group members. The group maybe should have realized they were getting a bum deal when they paid Lou over $29mm in 2000 to be freed from future contractual obligations in the first place. The current suit was originally filed in Florida but has since moved to New York because of the humidity.
Unfortunately, Lou Pearlman and TCR are bankrupt, and Lou has some legal troubles of his own after conducting one of the most lucrative (documented) Ponzi schemes ever. Pearlman used his Trans Continential Airlines aircraft leasing company as a front to set up a falsely FDIC certified savings program that promised a 6-8% return. Now, everyone is suing the hyper-extended LP (including a NYC dentist, and 1,800 others), and his assets are in liquidation (including his Rolls, with a steering column that gave Justin Timberlake just enough head room). He’s since left the country and no one can find the guy (authorities thought he was here until the last minute).
People (admit it) apparently bought 86,000 Backstreet Boy albums last year.
Backstreet Boys still got it goin’ on []

More Investment Rapping.

We’re not sure exactly what to make of this trend of investment rapping. First we had Mike Masdea creating his very own version of Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” to tout semi-conductor stocks. And now the team up at Canada’s National Post have gone an written an original hip-hop song, just in time for the Toronto Get Your Money Right Hip-Hop Summit on Financial Empowerment.
It’s not so bad, actually. We like the line about having “more shares than Sonny.” (Hint: Say it aloud and it makes sense.)
National Post investment rap [National Post]

  • 29 Aug 2006 at 12:18 PM
  • Analysts

CSFB’s Very Own Eminem: Analyst Karaoke

eminem.htmMeet Mike Masdea, a well-respected semi-conductor analyst at Credit Suisse in San Francisco. Recently it seems* Mike decided to add a little color to the blast voicemails the bank sends out to institutional clients with market recommendations. And by color we mean making his recommendation in the form of a version of Eminem’s “Lose Yourself.” He begins: “If you have just one shot, a single opportunity to seize the bottom of the cycle, one moment, would you capture it? Or just let it slip?”
If only all conference calls could be this entertaining. Mike Masdea, the new Eminem, deserves a medal. Who knew Silicon Valley was the next 8 Mile?
Right click and and download the file here.

* Editor’s note: Messages left with Masdea’s assistant went unreturned so we cannot confirm that this is definitely Masdea on this recording. But circumstantial evidence (email forward trails) strongly suggests it.