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hamm/arnellOklahoma fracking billionaire Harold Hamm’s ex-wife cashed a check he sent her to cover the almost $1 billion awarded as alimony in their divorce, his lawyer said. State Court Judge Howard Haralson in Oklahoma City ordered Hamm, CEO of Continental Resources Inc. (CLR), on Nov. 10 to pay $972 million of his then-estimated $16.1 billion oil industry fortune to Sue Ann Arnall, his wife of 26 years. Arnall had appealed the award as too small. Hamm also appealed. Arnall’s cashing of the check, which includes interest since the ruling, doesn’t necessarily mean the case is settled, Michael Burrage, Hamm’s lawyer, said today in a phone interview. [Bloomberg]

Sad days.Spending hundreds of millions of dollars of investor capital on teddy bears and the Islanders will get you 10 to 20 behind bars. Letting it happen and then ratting them out at a convenient moment? That earns you a stern-ish talking to. Read more »

It's just... I get the feeling she's not being completely honest with us.Starboard Value’s Jeffrey Smith really does appreciate the “constructive and on-going dialogue” its had with the Yahoo! CEO, one which presumably did not include and awkward and inscrutable recitation of a children’s book. Indeed, he thought that he and Marissa were on the same page, re: selling a bunch of stuff and giving the proceeds back to shareholders rather than buying garbage no one wants with it, like CNN.

It’s just that he’s hearing things that worry him a little. And Jeffrey Smith can get a little defensive when he’s worried. So, he’d like to say in the nicest possible way: Don’t do anything stupid like making a big, headline-grabbing deal, unless it’s the one and only one we’ve given you permission for, or else. Thanks. Give Clarence Otis and the former directors of Darden Restaurants a call if you need it spelled out any further. Read more »

Write-Offs: 1.8.15

$$$ Meet the most powerful woman in hedge funds [NetNet]

$$$ S&P 500 Erases Loss for Year as Stocks Rally for 2nd Day [Bloomberg]

$$$ Mark Cuban: I can’t figure this market out [CNBC]

$$$ Ex-Goldman trader’s fund up 51 pct playing energy’s rise and fall [Reuters]

$$$ Officials in San Diego are trying to sort out how a 5 1/2-foot snake wound up in a toilet at an office building. [AP] Read more »

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  • 08 Jan 2015 at 6:18 PM

Henry Blodget Learns Something New (About Vibrators)

blodgetWhile staying at a “supposedly family-friendly hotel” in Las Vegas called SLS, Blodget made a heinous discovery: His mini-bar came stocked with an intimacy kit, a relatively typical inclusion for upscale hotels, that included two condoms, lube, and a minivibrator. Appalled by this revelation, Blodget observed, “I’m no expert in vibrators, but I was surprised to learn that one could fit in that little box.” That’s an actual quote. [Daily Intel]

  • 08 Jan 2015 at 4:58 PM

Phil Falcone Suffers Biggest Indignity Yet

philfalconeofficehockeystick-260x3371Sure, he’s suffered a lot of them over the past few years, what with having to constantly defend his passion project, LightSquared, to the naysayers (and there have been many), being banned from the securities industry for half a decade, and living next door to people who don’t appreciate the commitment he brings to the table re: scaring the shit out passersby on Halloween. But this latest one? Wherein he wasn’t invited to lace up his old skates and participate in the Harvard v. Yale alumni hockey game going down Saturday night at Madison Square Garden? It’s clearly the the harshest, core-cutting-est one to date, by far. Read more »

  • 08 Jan 2015 at 4:12 PM
  • Banks

Italian Police Would Like A Word With Credit Suisse

Ciao.Also, a look around its Milan digs. You know, just in case there’s anything sitting around about the Swiss maybe helping some Italians hide a few euros in Bermuda. Read more »

  • 08 Jan 2015 at 3:40 PM

The Ruble Is In The Toilet: What’s In It For You?

banya branchesAre you dreaming of a mid-winter getaway? Looking to indulge your caviar tastes on a Buffalo Blue Cheese Combos flavored budget? Want to visit a banya where you can be sure the branch-beating part of the experience is authentic? Thinking hypothermia would add a little excitement to your trip? Consider hopping a plane to Russia, ASAP. Read more »