bittergreen's Profile
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Entry: Opening Bell: 3.20.08
posted by bittergreen
Mar 20, 2008 8:15AM
I love the image of Jamie Dimon going and getting in the right side of a car on the Morgan side of 47th st. having the car drive 20 feet, and stopping and getting out on the left side of the car and going into Bear Stearns.
Also, Bear employees should take solace that JP Morgan employees had cots to sleep on during the blackout of '04 when all Bear employees got were lights, air conditioning, and functioning internet.
Entry: LOL? More Like ROFLMAOWPIMP!
posted by bittergreen
Apr 03, 2008 2:15PM
>> no way an MD writes 'lol'.
say former 2nd year analyst <<
MD/P's at Bear are roughly the equivalent SVP's at every other bank. And you get a VP title for showing up for work on-time for 5 days in a row.
Entry: Slow Is Fast, Fast Is Slow
posted by bittergreen
Apr 16, 2008 10:17AM
Online Safes... Genius. Now I'll finally have a place to store my GTAIII:Vice City 100% complete savegame file.
Entry: Hurry! Space Is Limited!
posted by bittergreen
Apr 16, 2008 1:23PM
CDO's allow you to gain access to a wide variety of assets (whether you want that exposure or not).
posted by bittergreen
Apr 23, 2008 12:29PM
Can we get a follow-up report on today's bathroom conditions on the trading floor of Power Merchants Group?
Entry: Yahoo Is Doomed To Marginalization (Oh, And Microsoft Too)
posted by bittergreen
Apr 25, 2008 1:14PM
Microsoft should jettison consumer software, consumer hardware, worthless internet properties and focus on pumping out a new version of Windows and Office every two years as a commodity product, and declare a dividend.
Entry: Keep On Predicting What The Fed Will Do-- Because Ron Would've Wanted It That Way
posted by bittergreen
Apr 30, 2008 10:54AM
I've got all my money (and a little leverage to boot) on the Fed announcing they are being taken private by Blackstone, and that the US is returning to the Gold Standard.
Entry: Donald Trump Thinks America Is About To Fail
posted by bittergreen
May 15, 2008 4:23PM
Last time I used Trump as a contrarian indicator, I shorted Cattle Futures after the introduction of Trump Steaks. I'm in the hurt locker now.
Entry: Imagine How This Whole Thing Would've Turned Out If They'd Gone With Bagels
posted by bittergreen
May 28, 2008 1:42PM
Anal_yst:
Alan Schwartz. Clearly a Muslim name if I've heard one.
Entry: Let's Get Serious For A Second
posted by bittergreen
May 29, 2008 1:08PM
While I believe it's entirely possible to hold 350 lbs. over your head for several seconds, I'm somewhat dubious of the mechanics of it.
So was "You go girl" guy on a the bike, when broker guy lifted him? How anybody could get a man on a stationary bike over their head with their compliance, would be a Herculean task of balance and core strength. Without compliance? no possible way.
So was "You go girl" guy in one hand, and the bike in an one hand, and a bike in the other? The only possible way, is that the broker lifted "You go girl" with both hands, then using one hand, suspended him in the air while he proceeded to pick up the stationary bike. Most plausible, but still unlikely. And why pick up the bike anyways?
Entry: Alan Schwartz Declining Offer From JPMorgan Cayne?
posted by bittergreen
Jun 02, 2008 12:23PM
Teach a course at the Learning Annex about how to make money in the Structured Finance markets.
Entry: Prince, Cayne, Moz: You Have No Idea How Much This Is Killing Them
posted by bittergreen
Jun 04, 2008 3:19PM
As a CEO myself, I can empathize with just how tough it can be to stock a compensation committee with crony's who are going to give you an oversized pay package.
Entry: An Omniuous Sign for the Battle of Yacahn?
posted by bittergreen
Jun 19, 2008 12:38PM
Nothing like a good round of cost-cutting to improve employee morale.
Entry: Bear Stearns Managers Arrested, Bear Stearns Minions Drunk
posted by bittergreen
Jun 19, 2008 12:44PM
My vote?
Outside in the alley, packing a bowl.
posted by bittergreen
Jun 24, 2008 12:29PM
Sweet. I'm in the market for investment bankers who walk around the street wearing sandwich boards. Would a check for $5 million be enough?
Entry: Are Taxpayers On The Hook In Fed's Bear Bailout?
posted by bittergreen
Jul 11, 2008 12:31PM
No need to raise taxes or stop spending. Just tack it on to the bill the Boomers have already racked up and our handing off to their children.
Entry: The Tip We Just Received Is Presented Without Comment, Because Words Fail To Capture The Absurdity Of The Situation, Though We Have To Wonder-- Did They Cut Off All Water To The Building? Yeah, That's What We Thought. The Soda Thing, However, Is Total BS
posted by bittergreen
Mar 19, 2008 9:46AM
Following in the footsteps of Bear Stearns. There wasn't free anything at 373 Madison. If wanted some water, and didn't want to pay anything for it, you were filling a cup in the Men's room.
Funny that having their employees paying for everything off a magnetic strip on the back of their employee ID didn't save Bear from liquidation.
GS might want to think about more drastic cost-cutting measures, along of the lines of re-evaluating their CEO's $80 million bonus.
Then again, forgoing bonuses by executives didn't save Bear either.