Robert Benmosche has a vineyard in Croatia take care of and the finest bathroom fixtures money can buy. And it would be nice to tend to his grapes and enjoy some time on the can without having to worry about the company he’s been tasked with turning around, and the government breathing down his neck. He’s threatened to leave before and if he did now, people probably woudln’t give him too much shit, since it’s what every AIG CEO does anyway. Tradition and whatnot. But he’s promised his little workers that despite the fact that he honestly cannot take Ken Feinberg being such a god damn nag, and he’d be a lot happier just taking off, Daddy’s no deadbeat. Today he reaffirmed that commitment. Read more »
AIG
Today the Journal has a story examining the effects of absentee CEOs, particularly those running some of our nation’s shittiest bailed out companies. Though there is the argument that these firms will never learn to stand on their own feet unless we stop coddling them, some feel the absence of daddy chief execs hurts employee morale, and so on and so forth. What does AIG commander-in-chief Robert Benmosche have to say about that? Shove it up your ass. As previously stated by Bobby himself, he can do just as good a job remotely in Croatia, where he has grapes to tend to and the finest bathrooms money can buy to take advantage of as he can in lower Manhattan. Also? He’ll be damned if he’s gonna fork over extra money to the government when Ken Feinberg is already raping his employees blind. Read more »
As you know, AIG’s fourth quarter results came in– not so good!. In any case, Bobby B. is happy and wants the world to know it. AIG reported a loss of $8.9 billion in the fourth quarter, which is an improvement from the $61.7 billion loss in the year-ago period. And this, my friends, is making Bobby “proud” and he wants to thank you. Yes you, all of you. He “appreciates the support of the people in this country.” Bobby is also very thankful to have such wonderful employees. Employees, who not only work at the most despised company, but who do so “with commitment and enthusiasm.” He’s “very impressed with their attitude and the willingness to roll up their sleeves and make things happen.”
Also, he’s got a plan.
Kudos to Matthew Goldstein who yesterday got a hold of AIG’s much sought-after Schedule A, “List of Derivatives Transactions.” Let’s hope that Hollywood optioned the AIG saga, because the story is too good to pass. (I’m digressing for a moment, but any thoughts on who could play Geither? Blankfein? Liddy?) While the unveiling of Sked-A identifies the 178 mortgage-related securities, or CDOs that AIG wrote CDS on, the fact that some people seem surprised at these, seems, well, surprising, to say the least.
SIGTARP Neil Barofsky- who is testifying later today- is adding oil to the AIG fire, saying in prepared remarks that French regulators were actually willing to negotiate AIG’s obligations after all. The claim further undercuts the argument the Fed has been using all along, namely that they didn’t push domestic counterparties to take haircuts as foreign regulators were unwilling and/or legally barred from taking discounts.
12:40 Hank, whose rosacea is flaring up like nobody’s business, has arrived to put Geithner out of his misery.
12:41 He’s happy be to be here and answer your questions, but just so you know, he’s got limited knowledge of the topics and not a lot of time, so let’s move this shit along. Seriously, nature walk at 1:45. The birds wait for no one.
12:53 Paulson: “All money printed is green.” Also the lead track on his new album. Not a coincidence.
1:00 Hank is not going to second guess the opinions of people, for instance, Tim Geithner. So piss off.
1:15 I love you Elijiah Cummings but why????????? Why do we have to keep talking about those mo-fucking AIG bonuses??
1:20 Interrupted by the iPad. Oh, Mock-Turtleneck is gonna pay for this.
9:55 5 minutes to show time. While we wait:
(I have it on good authority that Geithner and Paulson have rehearsed the above moves and will be performing them in lieu of opening remarks. Or they’ll just sit there and recuse themselves while turning red. It’ll be one of these two things. Hoping against hope…)
10:10 Rep. Towns: “The AIG counterparties were given a piggy-bank full of taxpayer money and told ‘help yourselves’.”
E-Towns invites everyone to join him in fixing the system. Come on down.
10:18 Rep. Issa comes out with the big guns– the old man and his dog, who told Issa bankruptcy would’ve been a better option, and who is putting together a jigsaw puzzle that will reveal a picture of Geithner shoving hundos in Lloyd’s g-string.
10:20 T.Geith’s eyebrows are not happy.
10:24 Geithner did what he did for the American people. He loves you all so damn much.
10:28 AIG was “the only fire company operating at the time.” So TG whipped out his hose, and did what he had to do.
10:40 This decision didn’t come easy. It was like Sophie’s Choice out there.
10:42 Can we take a guess as to what the girl behind TG is cracking up about?
Testicle bombers can apparently board planes freely despite being on terrorist watchlists and after having been reported to the CIA, but dammit, AIG emails will get a national security status.
Brothers in arms Timmy G. and Ben B. will stand for each other ’til the end. In an interview with Politico, Timmy boy warned that the financial markets would react negatively, Armageddon will come and there will be locust showers if Ben isn’t confirmed.
So there you go. He warned you. In the meantime, there’s no word from Ben supporting Tim in anticipation of his testimony, Wednesday about his (non-)involvement in the AIG saga.
Timmy G, who, as we know is getting really frustrated with the whole AIG bailout storyline, apparently had a nice convo with Warren Buffett, Jamie D. and Lloyd on the day AIG was bailed out, at least according to phone logs submitted by the Fed in response to a subpoena last week from the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee.
Tim- who will testify next week- is maintaining, he never “looked at AIG memos” and that he “wasn’t involved in any AIG decisions.” Actually, he doesn’t even have any idea what AIG is. That talk with the big boys? Wasn’t him on the phone. Now leave him alone. Go harass Ben.
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