A man who claimed to have diplomatic immunity and millions in the bank vowed that the White House would be calling Stamford police with a reprimand Tuesday after he was arrested for trying to skip out on a near $500 Richmond Hill strip joint bill, police said. The man, Eddy Morales, 39, of Weathersfield, was held on $230,000 bond after police discovered that he had nine warrants for his arrest because he failed to appear for numerous court dates in several jurisdictions in the state, police said. Morales was additionally charged with sixth-degree larceny after he was unable to raise any money from family or friends to pay his $467 bill at Beamers Cafe strip club Monday night. The manager told police Morales showed up with several other men at 8 p.m. and said he was entertaining some business associates and wanted to start a tab. After the champagne and lap dances flowed for hours, Morales went to pay his bill and was turned down by the credit card company, police said. At that point, Morales told the manager that he and his family were worth millions and he was welcome to call police in the matter…Morales was arrested and while in his cell told officers that his family was worth a half billion dollars and the White House would be calling with a sharp reprimand, police said. The White House call never came. [Stamford Advocate, earlier]

Do you have a question for us? About anything? Send it here with the subject line “What do you think of this, Dealbreaker?”

Q: If you had to assemble hedge fund all-star team, that would invest together for a year or five or whatever time-horizon we decide on (the All-Star Game, it’s them versus the market), which managers would be on it? Read more »

On an alarmingly regular basis, people send emails to Dealbreaker seeking insight, on all manners of business. “I just received an offer from [insert hedge fund here] and I wanted to know what you think of the place.” “I’m a high-yield trader looking to jump ship– do you have any leads on jobs or ideas about where I should look?” “I have a bet going re: who would prevail in a street fight, Jamie or Lloyd and need you to weigh in.” “Is it possible to have romantic relationships (one-night stands) while spending every waking moment at the office?” “Do you think Vikram Pandit is the person responsible for his Wikipedia page including the line ‘he then turned to business studies & finance and earned an M.B.A in 1980 followed by a Ph.D. in Finance from Columbia Business School in 1986, after publishing a thesis involving a crushingly complex financial puzzle, entitled “Asset prices in a heterogeneous consumer economy’?” “Coke or Pepsi?” “Medium or rare?” “Do you think Biff Basness has tried to have you killed?” “Are you still in touch with Gianna Beamers?” “How would you construct a Wildebeest costume? Don’t ask me why.” While we (I) have no real expertise in much of anything, you may have noticed that we are quite fond of expounding on topics which some would comment we know nothing about. With that thought in mind, we’ve decided to now answer your questions, whatever they may be, on a weekly basis, on the site* (all names/emails/identifying details removed, of course). Read more »

  • 07 Dec 2011 at 5:44 PM

We’ve Got Your Office Holiday Party Right Here

Are you employed by an organization that jumped on the Holiday Party Ban bandwagon back in ’08 and never got off, or chose to downsize what were once magical affairs where anything could happen to a bunch of people milling around in the lobby? This year, do you want all that to change? Do you want to be able to go hog wild and eat more than the one bag of chips allotted per employee? Do you want to propose paying a senior staffer for a lap dance and not have it be grounds for dismissal this time? You’ve come to the right place. Read more »

The meeting is said to be scheduled for 3PM, leaving the staff, Beamers girls, Morton’s bartenders and the guy who โ€œsells a whole lot of brown-bagged bottles of liquor to UBS employees every evening” plenty of time to freak out that they’re going to potentially told the bank is leaving the state. Alternatively, those who dream of a giant Costco taking over the 100,300 square foot space will have the entire day to salivate over potentially pillaging delicious and moderately priced cheesecakes every day after work. Read more »

  • 05 Apr 2011 at 2:13 PM

Dealbreaker NCAA Tournament Challenge: Final Results

From Pool Manager NakedShort (who you should all thank for running this thing): Read more »

But only if you are into winning things like Peter Lugers, Beamers, Patagonias, “I love Dealbreaker” buttons and the chance to say you owned the DBNCAATC. Read more »

UPDATE II: Second bracket is full. Go here to get in the third one.
UPDATE: Apparently we hit the limit on the first bracket so we’ve opened up a second you can sign up for here. NakedShort will reconcile the results and aggregate them at the end of the tournament. Password is the same (animalliar).

As you may have heard, March Madness kicks off tomorrow. Despite this being the most wonderful time of the year for many, there exists one financial services hack who wants to destroy it for everyone. He’s announced his plan to (anonymously) report any colleagues he catches filling out brackets and keeping tabs on their picks during business hours. Does he work at your company? Maybe! Should you take a stand regardless? Yes! How so? By entering as many pools as you possibly can, making it impossible for him to keep up with the amount of people and their various offenses he must rat out. To that end, we’d like to help do our part. Today we introduce the First Annual Dealbreaker NCAA Tournament Challenge. You don’t need a reason to sign up besides the right to say you won the DBNCAATC but as an aside, the winner will receive dinner for him/herself plus three colleagues and/or friends at Peter Luger’s, followed by an outing to UBS favorite Beamer’s, an embroidered Patagonia and an ‘I love Dealbreaker’ button.** Read more »