Bear Stearns

  • 18 Aug 2010 at 12:06 PM

Nothing Can Get Ralph Cioffi Down

Last November, Matthew Tannin and Ralph Cioffi’s days were made when, in a in a flash of prosecutorial incompetence, the dream team who ran the two ridiculously named Bear Stearns funds– High Grade Structured Credit Strategies Fund and High Grade Structured Credit Strategies Enhanced Leverage Fund– were acquitted on charges of conspiracy, securities and wire fraud, and dodged 20 years each in the big house. There was no problem whatsoever with the fact that they’d painted a rosy picture to their investors as the bottom fell out of the credit market and they moved their own money out of the time bomb which ultimately cost clients $1.6 billion and, in fact, the jury was so impressed with how the team conducted their business that many indicated 12 ready and willing investors await. Before he was proven innocent, however, Cioffi had to do a little unloading of assets, the most valuable ones being a house in Southampton, one in New Jersey (he and his wife are now in a rental) and his prized Ferraris. Now he tools around in his wife’s Honda and if you thought that’d be a source of depression, you thought wrong. Cioffi says it’s a great little car. Read more »

Why wouldn’t the magician, philosopher, former Chairman of Bear Stearns and former friend o’ Jimmy not want to see his old pal, who he hasn’t spoken to since Bear was sold to JPMorgan (where Greenberg took a gig, while JC chose to spend his time perfecting the perfect panini to eat whilst baked)? According to a new interview with AG, it involves a desire to avoid stepping in shit. Also, Cayne impugned on the dignity of magicians.

IDD: If you ran into [Cayne], what would you say to him?
Greenberg: I would not like to step in horses—. So why would I stand around him? He’s a lying f—. Some of those lies in “House of Cards.” Lies about my wife — how could he bring my wife in that? How could he do that? He’s just a miserable, unhappy person…He said in the book, I understand, that when it came time for bonuses, I called the key men in and threw their bonuses on the floor and made them get on the floor and pick up their bonuses. Does that sound like me, really? Is that how you build a firm? A guy doing magic tricks, would he do that? Read more »

  • 01 Jun 2010 at 12:15 PM

Ace Greenberg Has Some Advice He’d Like To Share

It comes via his new book, The Rise And Fall Of Bear Stearns, and whether you’re a young whippersnapper who doesn’t know shit or an octogenarian who’s lost his way, you’d be wise to to listen to the guy.

It was sixty-one years ago that I left Oklahoma City.  But it seems like yesterday that my father called me aside at the train station and said, “I’ll give you three pieces of advice: never make fun of a millionaire, never hit a cripple, and never have sex with an idiot.”  The best of my knowledge I’ve remembered all three.

Read more »

  • 13 May 2010 at 3:02 PM

Waiting For Jamie Dimon To Do The Right Thing

When I think of JPMorgan CEO James Dimon, a few things come to mind. His (devastatingly good) looks. His charm. His jokes. His (alleged) illegal tire dumping. I also think of a guy who takes pride in his roots, which the Dimon family can trace back to a little European country going through a rough patch at the moment. And so I must ask–where the hell is the love? I’m not the only one wondering these things. I was out with some people who are paid to think about such matters last night and they were aghast at the notion hat JD has yet to use JPMorgan to bless Greece with his Croesus touch. People sincerely want to know why he hasn’t offered to buy the place for 1/100th of what it’s worth.  For the love of Jimmy Cayne’s roach clip, he did it for Bear’s trailer park of hemp and now, when it’s about family, JD is nowhere to be found? He needs to do something, show some freaking support for C’s sake, and if it’s not the suggestion I just made (which is should be), these are the options he must choose from: Read more »

12:10 Sure, it would’ve been worse to do it on 4/20 but Cinco de Mayo? Still pretty mean.

12:12 This thing is set to get underway in a few minutes. While we wait, I have a ton of items on the “wish-list” but beyond the obvious, I really, really want him to act like a stoned 17 year old who just got busted. “I know my rights, man.” “I’ve read the constitution.”

12:20 LET’S DO THIS. Reading of the prepared statements. Incredibly, CNBC thinks interviewing the CEO of Nike is more important than Big Jim, so you can follow along here.

12:30: Alan Schwartz maintains that Bear was awash– nay, drowning– in liquidity days before it went down for the dirt nap.

12:32: Jim concedes, “in retrospect, in hindsight, leverage was a bit too high.”

12:41: Angelides: Could you have done anything to prevent that weekend in March?

Cayne: Nothing. There was nothing that could have been done. We were taken down by hedge funds. Bear Stearns [and these words seriously just exited JC’s mouth] “was a big fat goose walking down the lane that’s about to be eaten up by competitors.”

Angelides: You were in Detroit that weekend, right? At a bridge tournament?

Cayne: That’s correct. Read more »

Paul Friedman, a former senior managing director at Bear Stearns, once famously said “we did this to ourselves. . . . It’s our fault for allowing it to get this far, and for not taking any steps to do anything about it.” He told William D. Cohan there was “mismanagement at the top” of the firm.

But now, Freidman is taking back his words. “I was interviewed at a time when I was looking for someone to blame,” he told the Financial Crisis Inquiry Commission. “I’m sure you’ve read things where I blamed people I’ve never even met. It has bothered me for two years” he said. “I am human.” Read more »

Except when I was hot-boxing it. You know how that goes, Mr. Chairman. You really need the area completely sealed off. I find using a towel helps. Anywhoooo….so, other than those times– always open! For example, one time a guy came in and wanted to know why my office smelled like pot, which I explained to him had nothing to do with me getting high at work, but rather the fact that I’d just gotten a new leather couch, and as everyone knows, new leather couches often reek of weed. Read more »

  • 03 May 2010 at 5:56 PM

Letter Reveals More Names in Galleon Case

Roomy Khan, one of the key cooperating witnesses in the Galleon insider trading case, used her extensive rolodex of insiders to gain access to secret market-moving information. Recently released court documents show that list of contacts could be longer than we thought.

So for we know about several of Khan’s associates connected to the case including Raj Rajaratnam, ex-SAC trader Choo-Beng Lee, Ali Far, Intel executive Rajiv Goel, Anil Kumar and Lenaxa Global Management trader Thomas Hardin (aka Tipper X.)

And last week, we learned that prosecutors are running “covert investigations” that involve two individuals occasionally mentioned in several interviews Khan had with federal agents. That info came to light in a motion by Rajaratnam’s seeking access to unredacted transcripts of the interviews. Judge Richard Holwell quickly denied Raj’s motion because of the ongoing investigation. Read more »