Bear Stearns

  • News

    Did Jimmy Cayne’s Shitty Interpersonal Skills Accelerate The Downfall Of Bear Stearns? One Hedge Fund Manager, Who’s Been In The News A Lot Lately, Says Yes

    Most people, Dick Fuld/Erin Callan/LEH shareholders notwithstanding, agree that porn star and Greenlight Capital founder David Einhorn is a very nice guy and an extremely decent human being. New York magazine’s profile of the man of the hour corroborates the story, with anecdotes from Bill Ackman, who says he’s “a super-high-quality human being,” Greenlight employees […]

    / Jun 16, 2008 at 4:53 PM
  • News

    Scenario Contest Friday

    This man was spotted outside the Federal Reserve Bank of New York yesterday at 11:20 am.

    / Jun 13, 2008 at 12:25 PM
  • News

    Lehman Loses, Sign Of Things To Come?

    As you know, last night Columbia’s Baker Field played host to the big lacrosse match-up between Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers. We were supposed to go but decided instead, from about 6:30 to around 10:00 PM, after everyone else had gone home, to walk outside sans phone/wallet/keys, in order to test the efficacy of the […]

    / Jun 11, 2008 at 4:05 PM
  • News

    WaMu Hires Ex-Bear

    Washington Mutual announced this morning that it has retained the services Michael Solender, former general counsel of Bear Stearns, as its chief legal officer, reporting to (for now) CEO Kerry Killinger. The work probably won’t be as challenging without the many frequent interruptions throughout the day with queries such as, “Tell me again, what is […]

    / Jun 4, 2008 at 10:15 AM
  • News

    Alan Schwartz Declining Offer From JPMorgan Cayne?

    The Post reports that former Bear CEO Alan Schwartz may be having second thoughts about taking a job at Bearpont Morgan Chase. One source “familiar with the matter” says it’s the humanist in Schwartz that’s causing him to reconsider, claiming that the fact that more than half of Bear’s employees are without jobs (though not […]

    / Jun 2, 2008 at 12:00 PM
  • News

    Severance Watch ’08: Bear Stearns

    Apparently getting laid off by Bear Stearns in Dallas isn’t such a bad deal. First year analysts are said to be receiving three months severance plus a full bonus, according to a source familiar with the parting gifts.

    / Jun 2, 2008 at 10:49 AM
  • News

    This Changes Everything

    Kate Kelly isn’t the only one giving us an early preview of (what’s got to be) her forthcoming book on Bear Stearns! For his latest Trader Monthly column, out today, CNBC’s Charlie Gasparino hops aboard the J-Cay train, for a little look-see at what we hope in our heart of heart’s will be titled When […]

    / May 28, 2008 at 1:55 PM
  • News

    Imagine How This Whole Thing Would’ve Turned Out If They’d Gone With Bagels

    The second installment of Kate Kelly’s 3-part series on the destruction of Bear Stearns answered many questions. Among them: which clients pulled out in the days prior to the intervention (notably, a little shop called RenTec), where did Jamie Dimon celebrate his 52nd birthday (Avra, a Greek restaurant on East 48th street) and does Alan […]

    / May 28, 2008 at 12:18 PM
  • News

    Attention Job Seekers: One Whole Opening At JPMorgan

    Citadel has stolen yet another one of Jamie Dimon’s toy soldiers. Bill King is the third member of JPMorgan’s investment bank management committee to resign this week to join Ken Griffin in Chi-town, as the hedge fund’s head of securitized products, overseeing mortgage securities, asset-backed securities, and collateralized debt obligations. Dimon is said to be […]

    / May 28, 2008 at 10:30 AM
  • News

    Hey Kids, You Wanna See A Card Trick?

    Amid the turmoil, Alan “Ace” Greenberg, Bear Stearns’s 80-year-old former boss, attempted to break the tension in a lighter way. Wearing his trademark bow tie, Mr. Greenberg, who still trades, performed magic tricks to amuse colleagues. What the Journal doesn’t tell us, is that Old Man Greenberg did this every day just prior to the […]

    / May 28, 2008 at 9:37 AM
  • News

    Zap! Pow! Spliff!
    The Bear Stearns Meltdown In Easily Digestible Cartoon Form

    If this is the new Wall Street Journal, BRING.IT.ON. The Batman-looking cartoons plunked down in the middle of an A1 article are definitely something we will wholeheartedly get behind. Some suggestion to take things to the next level: a. Drop the pretense. Lose the text and make it one long comic strip b. You need […]

    / May 27, 2008 at 2:17 PM
  • whoops

    Of Course Bear Stearns Is Being Sued For Telling JPM It Could Buy 383 Madison Without Getting Permission From The Land Owner First!

    Would you recognize the place if *hadn’t* breached its agreement to give 383 Madison LLC, the proprietor of the property, the right to make the first offer on the building, before entering into a contract that provided JPMorgan an irrevocable option to purchase the building, regardless of whether or not the deal to create Bearpont […]

    / May 23, 2008 at 1:30 PM
  • News

    JPMorgan: Viva* Los Layoffs

    It seems like all we ever hear about is what a nice guy Jamie Dimon is, and how he’s a “giant among midgets” and his souvlaki is out of this world, but the direction he’s taking Bearpont Morgan Chase** is deeply disturbing and very much brings his judgment into question. Not two weeks ago JPMorgan’s […]

    / May 22, 2008 at 12:27 PM
  • News

    Layoffs Watch ’08: GE

    GE Commercial Finance apparently cut 500 employees today. Our tipster, who was one of the victims, had just moved over from Bear a year ago thinking he could “ride out the downcycle.” Just think– had he gone the other way, he would’ve still (probably) been out of a job, but could’ve scored some sweet BSC […]

    / May 20, 2008 at 4:58 PM
  • News

    Theory: This Was Actually Intended Soley For Jimmy Cayne But They Had To Send It To Everyone So As Not To Embarass Him

    The (very) internal Bear memo we just received is from December and yet, we feel the message bears repeating (at regular intervals, which perhaps is the case for the original recipients, who need to be reminded about this stuff). For the employees who’ve seen this before–whether you’re unsure about plans for the future or are […]

    / May 15, 2008 at 8:45 AM
  • News

    People Moves: Anyone Need A Lawyer?

    Supposedly, the lawyer who “mistakenly” included the clause about JPMorgan being responsible for Bear’s losses regardless of whether or not the deal goes through is “no longer with the firm,” as of this morning. For the life of me, I can’t imagine why. Personally, we feel he injected a much needed dose of comic relief […]

    / May 14, 2008 at 1:56 PM
  • News

    Jamie Dimon To Summarily Execute Thousands Of His Children To Show “All Are Equal In My Eyes”

    JPMorgan may lay off up to 4,000 of its own in the coming months. About half of the cuts are said to be related to making room for those “star” Bear Stearns employees replacing their Dimonette counterparts which, last we heard, included the entire bespoke correlation trading team. The other 2,000 are apparently being let […]

    / May 14, 2008 at 9:48 AM
  • News

    Just Wondering

    Now that Jamie Dimon has admitted that JPMorgan will make a billion dollars from the Bear deal, do you think he’ll stick to his previous promise to never again buy another failing investment bank at the last minute? BARTIROMO: You only had 48 hours to do the due diligence, correct? DIMON: That’s correct. BARTIROMO: That […]

    / May 13, 2008 at 10:14 AM

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