Big Auto

  • News

    Currency Singularity

    So unless you just crawled out of bed still in your Greenspan Underoos because you no longer have an office to go to, you probably know that General Motors is looking at a 2008 loss of $31 billion. Don’t worry though, because this is about what we expected. Perhaps it is our cynical side, but […]

    / Feb 26, 2009 at 11:07 AM
  • News

    10 Lions Versus 3 Gladiators

    The revolving door to the give-away party has started to turn, beginning with Chrysler which, after smashing through the floor of their own “worst case scenario” is back looking for $5 billion or so. Just to tide them over, you understand. Three top Chrysler LLC executives are to meet today with President Barack Obama’s automotive […]

    / Feb 25, 2009 at 2:00 PM
  • News

    Yeah, So That Car Czar Slot You Were Hoping For? Not So Much.

    You had to know that appointing a “Car Czar” with the kind of powers that might actually get something done when it came to Big Auto was just never going to happen. There is, after all, only one Lord of the Bailout, and he does not share power (unless it is via a gridlocked committee […]

    / Feb 23, 2009 at 1:33 PM
  • News

    We Totally, Seriously, Honestly Won’t Need Any More. Really.

    So GM is going to grudgingly accept another check for $4 billion. Is anyone else so numbed to large numbers at this point that $4 billion really doesn’t seem like much money? I mean, John Paulson spits $4 billion. Tim “The Safecracker” Geithner exhales larger sums while taking his afternoon nap. (And you believed that […]

    / Feb 17, 2009 at 10:40 AM
  • News

    GM Makes A Final Lap

    Just in case you weren’t sure, General Motors is in trouble. Big trouble. On top of all the other trouble you’ve no doubt heard about they are now planning to cut 10,000 jobs. Yesterday’s rumors are fact this morning as the flagging former giant begins to face the music. General Motors Corp., the largest U.S. […]

    / Feb 10, 2009 at 10:09 AM
  • News

    The Theta Theta Theta Sorority

    It says something that we credit Ford with some kind of great accomplishment insofar as they didn’t go begging for government handouts when GM and Chrysler debased themselves during Congressional Pledge Week. (“I want that bathroom floor shining in the light by morning. Here’s a toothbrush. If a sister asks, you must be able to […]

    / Jan 12, 2009 at 10:59 AM
  • News

    A Break In Bailout Nation?

    The longer the silence continues, the more it appears that Big Auto is facing some form of bankruptcy. Leaving matters in the hands of the current administration, rather than some initiative on the part of the legislature, certainly upped the odds that you’d see a Chapter 11esque move, but the long days of bailout silence […]

    / Dec 18, 2008 at 2:38 PM
  • News

    Big Auto’s Latest Suckers: The Treasury

    The Treasury Department said Friday it’s prepared to act to avoid any possible collapse of nation’s three largest auto companies given that rescue efforts in Congress have failed. “Because Congress failed to act, we will stand ready to prevent an imminent failure until Congress reconvenes and acts to address the long-term viability of the industry,” […]

    / Dec 12, 2008 at 11:03 AM

    Dealbreaker Afterdark: Big Auto In Big Trouble

    The Senate compromise looks dead at the moment. CNN is reporting that bipartisan talks have collapsed and the Senate bill looks dead. The pressure actually falls back to Pelosi now, who played a bit of legislative brinkmanship with the Senate and has now lost (baring some miracle tomorrow). GM will likely be the first victim, […]

    / Dec 11, 2008 at 10:47 PM
  • News

    Trials Of The Car Czar

    “…an administrator, provisional liquidator, conservator, receiver, trustee, custodian, or other similar official for it or for all or substantially all its assets.” Sound like the Car Czar to anyone? Yes. Us too. Know what else it sounds like? The 2003 ISDA credit derivatives definition sufficient to trigger CDS default provisions. Does the mere appointment of […]

    / Dec 11, 2008 at 2:09 PM
  • News

    Almost A Bailout

    Remember how the White House had like totally tied up that bailout deal yessiree-bob? And Democrats had it all worked out and were running that endlessly annoying “breaking news” ticker on CNBC even before the White House chimed in with that victorious (if droll) press conference? Ok, well, not so much. In fact, not at […]

    / Dec 11, 2008 at 12:18 PM
  • News

    Those Puppy Dog Eyes

    Hey, uh, GM. So, this credit thing, the bailout thingy, and this running out of money thing? Well, so… I’m not sure quite how to bring this up with you, but… we’re going to need payment from you up front from now on. What? Don’t look at me like that. We really can’t afford to […]

    / Dec 11, 2008 at 10:31 AM
  • News

    Freezing The Wages Of Sin

    I think the takeaway here is, really, that we shouldn’t worry that Jon Jon’s Cabaret (for those discerning Big Auto employees who might like to take in the view now and again) has halved the cost of a table dance (from $20 to $10) because all their margin is in food and drink, yes? It […]

    / Dec 10, 2008 at 5:18 PM
  • News

    CNBC Claims That The White House Claims That A Big Auto Bailout Deal Has Been Reached

    Ok, so Joe Kaplan is yammering in the White House Press Room via CNBC, I guess that makes it true. His yammering includes: Firms must meet an “economic definition of financial viability” (can’t wait to read that). They have to prove it by March 31 (can’t wait to see how this is evaluated). If they […]

    / Dec 10, 2008 at 11:05 AM
  • News

    Ode To The Drain

    Your favorite bailout and ours looks to be on the eve of a vote. True, roadblocks (if you will forgive the term) remain, like the Democratic complaint that firms should stop suing states with individual emission laws (seems a bit brash to force this to us, but we are due process hawks, unless Spitzer is […]

    / Dec 10, 2008 at 10:30 AM
  • News

    The Advantage Of Inaction

    Unsurprisingly, The Beard wants nothing to do with lending to big auto. Who does? (No one we hope). Still, its surprising to see someone with some backbone out there. To wit: While the Fed has used emergency-lending authority over the past year to aid financial firms, short-term debt markets and mutual funds, those decisions were […]

    / Dec 9, 2008 at 11:04 AM
  • News

    Wait For It… Wait For It…

    When it comes to superlatives, context matters. That is why you don’t get bent out of shape being impressed with the member of the Yale graduating class “most likely to run a small island dictatorship” or the law school student “most likely to win the Nobel prize,” or, perhaps, “the best martial artist Detroit has […]

    / Dec 8, 2008 at 12:43 PM
  • News

    Bankruptcy Is Not An Option (Except When It Is)

    The Chrysler hire of Jones Day for Armageddon counsel is looking less and less like a bluff. (Not that we thought it was to begin with, but not that we didn’t either). With Congress looking unlikely to just rubber stamp a bailout, and the rather pointed questioning, in particular of Chrysler, by the Critters, “If […]

    / Dec 5, 2008 at 3:45 PM
  • News

    Live Blogging The Pitiful Cries Of The Big Three

    10:42: At the moment, the execs are late. That’s what Congress gets for making them drive. Sen. Robert Bennett: Hey, I’ve got a brilliant idea. Why don’t we just have all the debt holders convert all their debt to equity. That would solve the problem of the large debt burdens these automakers have to service, […]

    / Dec 4, 2008 at 10:38 AM
  • News

    Fictions And Colored Facts From The Big Three

    1. “I took a train here.” (Jim Press apparently totally misses the point here. Why didn’t you drive? Right. Exactly). 2. “It’s not a bailout, its a loan.” (Not if you never pay it back it isn’t. And if all you need is a loan, issue more debt. Oh, wait, no one will lend to […]

    / Dec 3, 2008 at 1:27 PM

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